


a printed note

by hellwrites



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Almost everything, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Getting Back Together, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Kid Fic, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, Minor Samantha "Sam" Arias/Alex Danvers, alternative universe, and i changed many things from the show, btw lena isnt dead, but it will all be explained, i only took the main idea from the movie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-11
Updated: 2020-03-06
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:53:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 69,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21753289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hellwrites/pseuds/hellwrites
Summary: “Kara,I’m sorry to tell you like this but Ellie is our daughter.I need you to watch her for a week.I’ll explain everything when I get back,Lena.”Or, Supercorp The Game Plan AU
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 233
Kudos: 1219
Collections: Gays in Earth 38





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i'm sorry for any mistakes, english is not my first language, this is my first fic ever on this website

Kara treated herself with a cup of coffee before heading to work that morning.

Instead of flying, she walked slowly through the streets. It was a chilly morning, but the sun was there, shining shyly through the skyscrapers, touching the bare skin of her arms. As she moved forward, she felt the wind against her face, taking off her bangs from her eyes, a triviality that made her slightly smile. It was a human thing, as Alex told her, changing the hair to help coping with everything else in life and Kara was really surprised when it did work, at least in some level. As if she was someone else, someone new. Too bad she couldn't do it as many times as everyone else, because of her secret identity of course, but also because she was really lucky to hit the right spot using her laser vision through the mirror and wasn't really sure she would get it right twice. 

Everyone else around her was in a hurry, what reminded Kara of how her life was before Supergirl, running along with everyone else even though she could just fly, trying to fit in, although she had her doubts about ordinary humans being able to carry as many cups as she did at once plus a box with donuts. Still, everything was just so much easier before the cape. 

She smiled sadly, missing what not being Supergirl allowed her to have. When she was just Kara Danvers and didn't have to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders, she was allowed to make mistakes, the biggest of her problems involved getting Cat's coffee to her before it was cold and never mess up her usual order, not that she didn't like her current job, it was her dream job, but she had more time to just sit down and read the books she liked, to never miss a Disney movie's release date on the local theater, to drive back to Midvale every now and then and have some tea with Eliza, smell the sea.

And she had Lena. One of the few people in the world that knew her completely and loved every inch of her being. 

But, when Kara put on the cape, it came with a cost. A cost that, every single day, the moment after Kara first opens her eyes, she has to convince herself it is worthy. She mostly did it successfully, but then she would have to struggle against all the small things that reminded her of the woman she loved for the rest of the day and persist that she did the right thing. 

Supergirl was the right thing. She loved helping people, saving lives, and couldn't imagine how her life would be if she just stopped. If she only watched the news without ripping off her button-ups and running to the closest alley to take off to sky, like she used to do before, painfully holding herself back even though she could've stopped that fire, or rescued those hostages. She always had trouble sleeping after something like that happened, something that could have been avoided if she helped because Superman couldn't be everywhere. She used to lay her head down on the pillow and feel like a criminal, her head spinning around the millions of thoughts. 

So, Supergirl was the right thing.

And, when she finally reached CatCo, a few minutes later than her usual time, she greeted everyone around her with only a warm smile even though she was already feeling miserable and it wasn't even 10 o'clock in the morning. She entered the elevator, fixing her glasses uncomfortably as she stared at floor, trying not to make eye contact with the rest of the people inside it, avoiding the usual small talk as much as she could. After she had finally become a journalist, people were more willing to engage in conversations with her, as if she was suddenly worthy of their attention. Or it was because she didn't have to run around as much. Either way, it just wasn't a talking day for Kara. 

The immediate smell of coffee and the sound of furious typing as soon as the elevator door opened made her feel like home, uplifting her mood just a slight little bit, but even this bit was enough to push her through the day, that didn't have many promises of being a busy one. Last time National City faced a real crisis was about three years ago and it was the last time that she actually struggled to put out there everything the people needed to know.

She frowned when she saw that her table was occupied by a little girl, who was spinning on the chair worryingly fast. She approached slowly, searching in her memory if she had seen the little girl before, since she seemed extremely familiar. Her hair was blonde and curly, her eyes behind black round glasses with a thin frame were the same shade of blue as Kara's, 

"I think someone stole my chair", Kara joked when she was close enough for the girl to hear her. She immediately stopped spinning and looked at Kara with a concerned expression, as if she was afraid of being scolded, so Kara continued "It's okay, I barely sit there anyways."

"Okay." 

"I feel like I've seen you before. Who are you here with?" Kara asked her with her eyebrows furrowed as she searched on her mind where or when could she possibly have seen that girl before. It wasn't the first time someone brought their child to CatCo, even though Cat was a strict boss, she usually allowed that as long as she knew that child was there but wasn't bothered by their presence. 

"My mom", she answered, her blue eyes staring at her purple all stars as she kept swinging her legs back and forth. 

"Thats nice! And where is she?"

"She's right here."

"Oh" Kara nodded at first, thinking that the girl was shy and didn’t really want to communicate and feeling slightly ashamed for pushing the child to tell her anything, she was just a stranger after all-

Then, she realized.

"Wait. What?"

The girl leaned towards a yellow backpack that was placed below Kara's table and searched for something inside for a while until she found a piece of white paper.

"This is for you." She handed it to Kara, who took from her hands with a confused expression on her face. She unfolded the paper slowly as if she was defusing a bomb that could destroy half of the planet, but read the few words in a half second, going back to read it again, and again, and it still didn't make any sense.

It was a printed note with only a few words on it: 

“Kara,

I’m sorry to tell you like this but Ellie is our daughter.  
I need you to watch her for a week.  
I’ll explain everything when I get back,

Lena.”

Kara looked back at the girl, who now stared at her with expectancy, and Kara immediately understood why she looked so familiar. They had obvious similarities of course, the hair color, the eyes, but all the rest, every single millimeter of her face structure was an exact reproduction of Lena’s.

Was she really about to believe that girl was her child based only on resemblance and a simple note? 

Apparently, yes. 

“How did... How did you get here?” She stuttered, holding tight on the table with her free hand. That, of course, took off a piece of the wooden surface. Ellie’s eyes widened, and Kara immediately took a couple of steps back from the table, looking around to see if anyone else witnessed that.

“My mom brought me. She was going to wait for you but then she would miss the plane.” Ellie explained, back to staring at her shoes. 

Of course, Kara thought, the one day she decided she could go to work a little later than usual her ex, who she hadn’t seen or heard from on the past 8 years, dropped by and brought with her their child, hers and Kara’s. Their child. 

“Kara.” She flinched when she heard her name being pronounced by the girl’s sweet voice. Call her crazy, but she could’ve sworn that Lena used to say her name the same way, holding on the "r" a little bit, “You’re breaking the chair now.” 

Kara blinked a couple of times, only then noticing she was holding onto a chair. 

“Fuck. Wait. I'm sorry. You’re a child and I’m an adult. I shouldn’t swear. You’re a child. You’re my child. That’s... How... Okay, Kara, calm down. Calm down. I... Need... Air...”, her chest felt heavy and the amount of air inside that floor didn’t seem enough for her to keep breathing. A few minutes of flying around the city and she would be just fine, right?

“Wait, you can’t leave me here!” Ellie shouted when Kara started walking sloppily in the direction of the emergency exit, victim of an imbalance she has never felt before.

“I can’t leave you here.” Kara nodded as she repeated the girl’s words multiple times until she accepted them. It was her child. She couldn’t leave her. It was her responsibility now.

She then forced herself to walk back towards Ellie, reluctant to approach too much. 

“I knew this would be hard for you, so I baked cookies!” She found the bag of cookies in her backpack faster than she did with the note. She took one cookie out of it and offered to Kara, who just looked at it for a few seconds, as if waiting to be sure that it was actually happening. 

Kara slowly took it from her hand, not really in the mood for cookies (what, for her, was a worrying fact) but she didn’t want to upset the kid. After she took the first bite, her eyes widened when she realized that it was probably the best homemade cookie she had ever tasted.

“This is incredible” She said involuntarily, her mouth still full. Ellie then looked at her with the widest and brightest smile on her face, and that made Kara’s uncontrolled heartbeat finally slow it’s pace. 

“Did it help?” She asked, full of hope. 

“Yes.” Kara confirmed, staring at the girl with amazed eyes, “You said you baked it?” Ellie shyly nodded, her cheeks were flustered and she started nervously facing her shoes again, “What’s your secret?” 

“There’s no secret. I always follow the recipe, sugar, flour, chocolate chips” She explained, being communicative for the first time, Kara noticed, speaking with such confidence and property on a matter that usually a child her age wouldn't know much, “Some people like to make it crunchy so they add nuts, but I’m allergic so I just put more chocolate chips.”

“I can never get enough of chocolate.” Kara couldn't help but smile at her. 

“My mom says you’re the only person she knows that likes food more than me.” Ellie told her, and Kara’s heartbeat started to race once again with the thought of Lena talking to Ellie about her. What else did she tell her? Did she tell about Krypton? About her powers? About them? “Sorry! I didn’t want to upset you!” 

“You didn’t upse... Wait.” Kara analyzed the girl for a moment, as if she would find answers just by looking at her. She then continued in a lower tone, close to a whisper, “Did you hear my heartbeat?” 

Ellie nodded and recurred again to staring at her shoes. 

“Okay...” Kara breathed out but before she’s could start freaking over the fact that Ellie was part human part alien so she probably inherited more from Kara than just the enhanced hearing, she heard the familiar high heeled footsteps entering the room as most of the noise faded away, giving her something else to freak out about. Kara stood still, as if Cat wouldn’t notice her there if she didn’t move, while Ellie was leaning on the chair, trying to see whomever was causing such impact on everyone. 

And, of course, Cat stopped walking as soon as her eyes met with the girl’s, who smiled at her brightly. Cat couldn’t help but smile back and Kara was slightly intimidated by the immediate impact Ellie had on people.

“Hi... Little... Girl” Cat greeted her, “Who are you here with?”

“With me!” Kara quickly answered before Ellie could respond with “my mom” like she did earlier.

“Reporter salary is that bad that you’re in need for babysitting now?” Cat asked her, confused. 

“She’s not my b-“

“It was a favor to a friend.” Kara cut off Ellie’s phrase and the girl was visibly unhappy about that, “But it’s actually time for school, I just came to pick something up before taking her.”

“I’m sure the school gets even more interesting in the middle of the summer.” Cat half smiled and Kara was about to have a nervous breakdown. How could she forget they were in the middle of the summer? Actually, how could she remember it was relevant for something other than the weather? Cat had a son, she would know when kids had or didn't have classes, but Kara didn't have a child... not until minutes ago, so why would she know?

Great part of the people in the room were mostly paying attention to their dialog and were really bad at hiding it. But, noticing that Kara was failing her lying test, Ellie finally decided to play along. 

“It’s culinary school! I want to be a chef when I grow up so my mom signed me up for summer classes.” She explained and Cat nodded slowly, her eyebrows furrowed and her lips pressed, still suspicious, but decided to not insist on that. 

“Okay, that said, let’s get going.” Kara said in a hurry while she picked up Ellie’s backpack from the floor. The girl got up from the chair and she offered her hand to Cat, who laughed quietly at the formality before accepting it. 

“Cat Grant.” She introduced herself as they were shaking hands, both with small smiles on their faces. 

“Ellie Luthor.” 

Everyone but Ellie widened their eyes after that, and Ellie looked around with no clue of what was happening. Kara closed her eyes for a second, swearing quietly, they were so close to leaving without causing a scene or calling more attention. 

Kara faced Cat while grabbing Ellie’s hand, her desperate eyes begging for Cat to try to not let that information leave CatCo walls. 

But Cat just kept staring astonished as they walked in a fast pace in the direction of the elevator, Ellie trying to fast her pace to match Kara's.

“What happened?” Ellie asked when the doors closed, looking all the way up so she could see Kara’s face. Kara just swallowed, not knowing how to explain to Ellie that "she was a Luthor" and that for stupid reasons caused reactions on people. 

Lena was still news for a while after she left National City. People talked about the sudden move of taking L-Corp back to Metropolis, rumors went all around about her being afraid of Supergirl, since she left shortly after the new super shined into the spotlights. However, Lena Luthor was no longer there and her image slowly faded from National City news.

But Ellie had just announced to a room filled with reporters that Lena had a daughter. A lot could happen after that. 

"Well... your mother is a public person." Kara didn't find any better way to put it, but she should've expected that Ellie wouldn't understand what that meant, because the girl simply grimaced in response, "It means that she's famous, a lot of people know who she is... And her having a daughter is really surprising... Even though is not really anybody's business." The end of her explanation was more of a complaint than anything else.

"Oh.” That was all she answered, still trying to process the informations. The elevator reached the first floor and they walked out, still holding hands. Flying there would take less than five minutes, but, for some irrational reason, Kara didn’t feel safe to fly with Ellie. She was so... small and fragile. What if Kara dropped her? What if she hit a building? What if a flying alien decided to attack them? 

Ok, maybe Ellie was as made of steel like Kara was, but what if she wasn’t? 

In conclusion, the 10 minute walk was the safest option. 

“We’ll walk?” Ellie asked when they reached the sidewalk. 

“Yeah.” 

“My mom never walks on the street with me.” Ellie told her, “Our driver George always picks me up at school and takes us wherever we need to go. I like him. He likes One Direction, we sing their songs all the time in the car. But that’s a secret.” 

Kara frowned, wondering if Lena had something to be afraid of or if she worked that hard to just hide Ellie’s existence from the world. From her.

“That’s nice. But did she ever tell you why?” Kara asked cautiously. 

“She says it’s safer and that on the car reporters won’t bother us. They chase my mother many times.”

“So she hid you from them.” Kara concluded. 

“She didn’t hide me. But she never let me talk to them. She said she hates reporters.” Ouch, Kara pressed her lips almost in physical pain. But it wasn’t hard to guess that yes, Lena hid Ellie from reporters, she was just good at making the girl not realize it. 

“Okay. What about other people?” Kara insisted. Lena must’ve gone to much trouble to hide a child’s existence for so long. 

“There's Jess, and George, and uncle Jack, they’re all my friends.” Ellie answered, sounding proud of the micro list of people in her life, Kara's eyes slightly widened when she heard Jack's name, she wouldn't even imagine the two of them talking to each other again, imagine him knowing about Ellie's existence and being close enough for her to call him uncle. But the uncomfortable feeling that grew on her chest was there for something else.

They were lonely. 

“Where are we going?” Ellie asked nervously. Her curious blue eyes trying to take a look at everything around them as they walked. 

“To... My other work.” She told her. DEO was no place for a child, but Alex was there and Kara really, really needed her sister. 

“I get to go to Supergirl’s secret lair?!” Ellie exclaimed with excitement and started jumping as they walked. Kara was surprised she had to actually tighten her grip to keep holding Ellie and started to “shhh”, trying to calm the girl down. 

Super strength? Check. Yes. Definitely. 

Of course Lena told her that Kara was Supergirl. Because how could she even hide it with Ellie having powers of her own? 

“It’s not a secret lair. It’s called DEO, it’s a base of military operations.”, Kara clarified, feeling stupid afterwards since that probably didn't mean anything for Ellie. She wasn't really a natural when it came to kids, she did a terrible job when she had to babysit Cat's son once, and he was older than Ellie. When she had Ruby for an evening so Alex and Sam could go on a date, she did slightly better but the only way she found to keep her entertained was flying around the house with her because the little girl simply didn't want to watch the damn TV. And now she was looking after a child that she couldn't simply give back to her mother at the end of the day because she was the mother, "What I mean is that people there are really serious. It's a serious place."

“Oh. That’s not cool like a secret lair.” Ellie was genuinely disappointed. 

“I’m sorry, kid. But we have cool stuff there. Like swords.” It took her only a second to rethink what she said “Which you’ll stay away from, of course, because you could get hurt. But you’ll meet your aunt Alex." 

Alex was going to freak out completely. 

“Oh! Wait, wait wait!” She started jumping again and her little hands tried to reach her backpack that was on Kara’s hand. Kara stopped walking then, so she could take whatever she wanted inside it more easily. She then took a notebook whose cover was filled with sunflowers, the same color as the skirted overall Ellie wore over a lilac long sleeved t-shirt. Every piece of clothing she had on had a vivid color, what was completely opposed to the color palette of Lena’s clothes.

“Aunt Alex.” She said out loud as she wrote it on her notebook in clumsy handwritten letters. Kara observed her with curiosity on her eyes as they started walking again. 

“What’s this?” 

“Well we don’t know each other so I have questions that I wrote here and I’ll write everything new that I learn about you so I won’t forget.” Ellie explained and Kara held her breath for a few seconds, slightly alarmed by Ellie doing something that reminded her of herself. The chances of Ellie not being her daughter were lower by the minute... And that made Kara feel... Happy. 

“First question, is the most important one, what is your favorite food?” Ellie asked her, look expectantly at Kara, who didn’t even think before answering. 

“Potstickers.” 

“Mine too!” Ellie smiled as she wrote Kara’s answer below the question, “Once I ate potstickers everyday for a week!” 

“Woah, really?!” Kara was surprised. Was that little girl more hardcore on Potstickers than she was? Unlikely, but it was impressive nonetheless. 

“My mom wasn’t happy.” Ellie laughed as she remembered her mother's irritated yet already defeated gaze when she asked for Potstickers for the third time in a row, “I learned how to make them but mine are never as good as the restaurant’s. At least I think so.” 

“You can.... You can make potstickers? Are you serious? But you’re so little. And a kitchen is a dangerous place.”

“I’m not little, I’m 7!” Ellie protested and Kara couldn’t help but smile, again, “And I can’t cut myself, or burn, but don’t worry, my mom is always looking when I’m cooking because I'm messy.”

“So you were serious when you said that to Cat. You really want to be a chef.” 

“Yes! I want to learn how to cook everything in the world. My mom promised that one day we’ll make a trip and we will go to every country to eat all the food! You should go with us, Kara. You love food too.” 

“I... We’re here!” Kara was relieved to see the DEO building in front of her. She wondered what Ellie thought about her and Lena, about their relationship, about the reason why they never talked. But it was just too soon to ask. 

Ellie held Kara’s hand tight as stopped in front of the building, visibly nervous for being there. She was probably anxious for being in a new place, about to meet new people. 

“Okay, I need to change.” Kara warned her. Only a few people at the DEO knew her secret identity and that didn’t involve the receptionist, so she needed to suit up before going inside using the front door, something that she never did. 

“No! No, don’t leave me please.” Ellie begged her with visible fear on her blue eyes. Kara wasn’t ready for such a reaction, for Ellie being so terrified of being left alone. 

“It will only take five seconds. I promise.” Kara assured her, questioning herself if she should go down on her knees, people usually did that with kids, but she decided to just look down at her. Maybe say something to make her feel safer? “Wanna count?” 

“Okay.” Ellie nodded, letting go of Kara’s hand, starting to count after she heard the whoosh, “One, two, three-“

She stopped when Kara appeared in front of her once again, now with the blue pants, the red cape and her hair down. 

“See? I was even faster.” Kara winked and Ellie smiled at her brightly, her eyes slightly widened as she observed the version of her mother she was so excited to know. She raised her warm little hand, touching Kara’s chest crest with her warm fingertips.

“My mom told me it’s not an S. It’s Stronger Together. From your family from Krypton. Right?” Ellie asked her and Kara’s heart started to race once again. Lena raised Ellie by herself, she shut Kara out from even knowing she existed, but she kept in who Kara actually was. Told Ellie where she came from. 

“Right.“ Kara explained, "El mayarah."

“El mayarah.” Ellie repeated and Kara’s chest was filled with inexplicable joy. She never imagined she could have children on Earth and yet there she was, listening to her daughter speaking the language of Krypton. 

“Are you ready to go?”

“Yeah. I’m ready.” Ellie nodded and held Kara’s hand once again. 

And when they stepped out of the elevator, all the eyes were on them.

Not that Kara wasn't used to people staring at her. She was Supergirl, people were always staring at her wherever she passed through. But, at the DEO, her presence was expected, so everyone was used to see the Girl of Steel walking among them. What they were not used to see was the Girl of Steel using the elevator and bringing a little girl to the facility.

Ellie's grip on her hand tightened. She was certainly not used to the staring, or to the strangers in black carrying guns around, so her nervousness was to be expected. Her colorful clothes were standing out, so even the agents that were on the other side of the room noticed her there. Her heart was pounding against her chest, and Kara was about to say something to try and calm her down her she caught the sight of her sister.

Alex was concentrated on something going on her tablet, but then her eyes just followed everyone else's straight to Kara. She furrowed her eyebrows as Kara approached her, then put the tablet aside and crossed her arms in front of her chest. Kara had no idea of what could be going through Alex's mind on that moment, she was actually afraid to even try to guess. 

"Supergirl?" It wasn't much of a formal greeting that they tried to stick to when at the DEO, it was more like a what the hell is going on greeting.

"Can we talk in private?" She asked, begged, and Alex just nodded, looking at Ellie one last time before turning in the direction of the labs. The eyes were still following them as they walked towards the hallway, and Alex noticed that.

"I'm sure you all have something to do other than look at us." She shouted in annoyance, going full Director Danvers mode. All of a sudden, everyone seemed engaged in their own activities. Kara breathed out, feeling slightly more comfortable and, judging by her heartbeat, so did Ellie.

"Okay, can you go inside and wait? We wont be long, I promise." Kara looked at Ellie.

"Adult talk?" She asked, as if she was used to that happening all the time. Of course it did, judging by her mother's line of work that included constant meetings with clients, partners and potential investors. Kara wondered if Lena finally started to slow down at work after she had Ellie. 

"Yeah. Adult talk." Kara nodded and opened the glass door to the lab so Ellie could go in. Alex just watched the girl as she went inside and sat on the white couch placed on the corner of the room with a puzzled expression on her face.

"What's happening? Who is this girl?" She asked before Kara had the chance to start talking.

"My daughter." She said it loud and clear, fast and simple. Alex response was just a weird giggle, "Why are you laughing?"

"Because I thought I heard you say she's your daughter."

"But that's what I said."

"Kara, this is insane. How could you possibly have a..." Alex analyzed the little girl for a while, who was incredibly focused on writing something on her notebook, "6, 7 years old daughter?"

"Lena left her at CatCo with a note." Kara unfolded the paper and handed it to Alex, who took it while shaking her head in denial. She read the brief note and folded the paper again, pressing her eyes as if she had a headache.

“Okay, I know that you’ll always have a soft spot for everything that involves Lena, but really? You really believe this girl is your daughter solely based on a note that has no guarantee Lena even wrote?” Alex asked her, trying her best to keep her tone calm low.

“Of course not!” Kara defended herself, even though Alex wasn’t wrong because at first that was all it took for Kara to believe that, but she had more evidences now, “Look at her! She looks exactly like us, like me and Lena. And she knows about Supergirl, about Krypton, and she has Kryptonian powers! She’s probably listening to this conversation right now.” 

Both of them looked at the girl, who was staring at them. When she realized she got caught snooping, she looked back at her notebook.

"Shit." Alex mumbled after a facepalm, "I... How is this even possible? How could you get Lena pregnant? Okay, the time is coherent with the last time you saw each other and we could have missed something on your alien physiology... Or maybe she just went all crazy scientist and-"

"Alex-"

"Kara, I'm just-"

"You're gonna start-"

"I won't start anything, I just-"

"You hold grudges against Lena-"

"Just let me finish." Alex held her index finger up, what was enough to shut Kara's mouth, but she slightly rolled her eyes. She knew that Alex never forgave Lena for leaving and was always irritated just by the mention of her name. Lena used to be more than her sister's girlfriend, she was her friend and, while Kara dealt with what happened by being sad, Alex dealt by being angry. Because Lena shut everyone out, refused every attempt of contact that Alex and Sam tried to make. They respected it at first, Lena is heartbroken, give her some time, Sam tried to justify, but, even after many months Lena did not return their calls on her personal phone neither did she take the several messages they left with Jess. So they just stopped trying.

Alex then continued softly, placing one hand on Kara's shoulder, "Have you tried to at least contact Lena? I mean, now she has a solid reason to pick up the phone when we call her, if she actually left her daughter here."

"No... I haven't even thought about it. It's just..."

"Too much. I can only imagine." Alex squeezed her shoulder and gave her a reassuring smile. Kara was pretty sure that Alex was feeling and thinking a lot of things about the situation but she was keeping it together for Kara, and she felt really grateful for the sister she had. Then she reached for her phone on her pocket. Luckily, she never actually erased Lena's number from her contact list. 

She didn't pick up, not even after Kara tried three times. 

"This isn't right." Alex shook her head, "How come she just drops her kid and doesn't even want to hear from us?"

"I guess we'll have to wait until the end of the week when she comes to pick her up. It will be okay. We'll be fine." Kara was nodding nonstop.

"Did you ask her about where Lena went? Or what is she doing?" Alex pointed at Ellie with her head. Kara shook her head and Alex's eyes slightly widened with frustration, but she held it all back, Kara didn't need her snapping, specially because she looked like she was in the verge of a breakdown herself, "Okay, I'll try to talk to her, see if we can get some information."

Kara was still just nodding while Alex opened the door to the lab. She knew she could trust her sister who, unlike her, knew how to deal with children. 

"Hey, I'm sorry adult talk took so long." Alex greeted the girl, who just pressed her lips, as if she was intimidated somehow, "What’s your name?” 

"Ellie Lu- Ellie, just Ellie." She answered quietly, and that almost caused Kara physical pain. She was so young and was already struggling against her own name, like her mother had been doing for so long. 

"Okay, just Ellie." Alex joked and Ellie cracked a smile, "I’m Alex.”

“You’re Kara’s sister.” Ellie widened her eyes at the familiar name, the intimidation being replaced by curiosity as she pulled her alarmingly sophisticated and expensive looking pen, “Are you older or younger? Are you a secret agent? Is that why you work here?” 

“I see we have a future reporter right here.” Alex giggled as she sat by Ellie's side on the couch. Kara felt her heart skipping at the possibility of that little girl, her daughter, being like her, using her as a role model to anything. 

She leaned her back on the closest wall as she watched them talk, feeling grateful for having her sister around. She was Supergirl, but Alex was still the big sister who was there to help her deal with the challenges that were bigger than her, such as a seven year old that appeared out of nowhere. 

“Actually, I want to be a chef. It’s just that my mom is a scientist and she says it’s important to document things so you don’t forget.” Ellie explained and Alex was impressed by the use of the word “document”. 

“That’s really good advice. Well..." Alex's mind was going through the questions again, "I'm older, but I'm happy to know that it isn't that obvious. And I'm indeed a secret agent. Wanna see something really cool?" Alex asked and Ellie finally looked at her suspiciously. Alex took her badge from her back pocket and showed it to her, the DEO version of it. Ellie's eyes were inquisitive, at least until the badge changed after a quick tap on it to look like and FBI one, then she was totally impressed. 

"Wow!" She looked back at Alex, "It's like magic! That way no one knows where you really work."

"Now, tell me, isn't my disguise cooler than some glasses?" She shaded Kara and they both laughed hard. Kara looked with wide blue eyes and out her hand against her chest in a dramatic way. 

"What's your favorite food?" Ellie went on with her questions, her eyes staring at Alex excitedly.

"Hmm..." Alex held her chin and looked up as she tried to decide, "Probably pizza."

"I know how to make five different pizza toppings!" Ellie told her proudly and Kara smiled widely without noticing. Somehow, she was proud too. 

"That's pretty impressive. You're gonna have to make at least one for me. But... How about I ask you some questions now?"

"Okay." 

"Where did your mom go?" She asked carefully, her tone low and her hands resting on her lap. She wanted to keep things light. Kara was pressing her teeth against her underlip, waiting nervously for the response. 

"She didn't tell me exactly where she went, but she said it was far far away and that maybe she wouldn't be able to use her phone for a while." Ellie told her while staring at her shoes. Well, that would explain why she didn't pick up... At least this time. 

"Does she travel like this a lot?" Kara intruded, too curious about that to hold that question back. Lena was always a workaholic, Kara couldn't even count how many times Lena only ate because she stopped by with some takeout. And when Kara was too busy, she would always ask Sam or Alex to do it for her. How did she cope with having to raise a child by herself and running her company? 

"Not really, sometimes she goes for a day or two, but she never takes me with her. I usually stay with Jess or Uncle Jack while she is gone, but this time they were both busy, and she said that it would be unfair to them having to babysit for a week... and she said she doesn't really trust nannies, but I know she only says that because she is afraid I use my powers in front of people that aren't our friends." 

"Well, she's right, you really shouldn't do that." Alex's words were the same ones that were on Kara's mind. It was hard for her to keep her powers hidden at first when she had just gotten to earth, but it was easier for her to understand the consequences, she was a teenager already. But Ellie was a young child, everything was probably twice as hard for her. 

"Not without a cape, or someone would recognize me" Ellie smiled and Alex couldn't help but smile back at the girl mocking Kara like she did moments before. 

"Hey!" Kara protested. 

"We talk for five minutes and the sarcasm is all around. I'm sorry, Kara." Alex gave her an apologetic look, even though she wasn't really sorry, "Ellie, did your mom happen to give you a phone? In case of emergencies."

"Yes." Ellie nodded and searched for it inside her backpack, it was apparently under all of her clothes, but she managed to take it without having to take anything else out of it. It was a rather expensive phone for a child, its case full of rainbows and glitter. She turned the screen on and revealed a picture of her and Lena, what made Kara lean towards her direction to see better. Ellie was apparently holding the phone and taking the picture while Lena kissed her cheek with her eyes closed. They were probably on their living room, Kara could see a fireplace and a Christmas tree, both of them were wearing sweaters, Lena's was dark green with pine trees all around, Ellie's was red with what appeared to be some dinosaurs in the middle of it, the picture didn't really fit it all for Kara to be sure. 

They looked perfectly happy. 

Ellie unlocked the phone with her fingerprint and the home screen was just a mess full of games and no social media apps, so Kara guessed Lena probably had control over what Ellie had on her phone. She handed it over to Alex, who opened the contacts tab just to find only one number on it, Lena's. 

"I'll try to call your mom, okay?" Alex asked.

"Why?"

"Well, we love to have you here, but it was a little bit sudden-"

"She was going to wait for Kara at her work but she took too long to get there and my mom needed to get on a plane" Ellie explained, seeming a little bit overwhelmed by Alex insistence on Lena. Maybe she was afraid that Alex, or Kara, were angry with her mother. That was already enough for Kara to just leave that subject aside, at least for a while, but Alex gave it another try. 

"I just wanted to check on her, see if everything is okay." She reassured her. 

Ellie stared at her for a few seconds but consented, watching closely while Alex held the phone against her ear. There was no response whatsoever, and, since she would probably never ignore a call from her daughter, that was the confirmation they needed about Lena actually being at a unreachable place.

"Yeah, she is really without service. But that's alright, we could try again later. "

"Excuse me, director." A DEO agent stood by the door, "We could really use your help."

"I'll be right over." Alex told him and he nodded before walking away in a fast pace. 

"Will you be needing me?" Kara asked her, ashamed for hoping that they would need Supergirl so she didn't have to actually be with Ellie on her own. 

"We'll try to solve whatever it is without you. For now, take the day off from CatCo, go home with her. I'll be there later, I promise." Alex said, as if she read Kara's mind and knew that she didn't feel like being alone with the girl, but she had no choice but to do it, "Ellie, it was a pleasure to meet you but I need to get going with my secret agent stuff, I'll see you later, and I'll bring my daughter with me. You'll like her."

"You have a daughter?!"

"Yes, her name is Ruby, she's 12 but I'm sure you guys will get along.", Alex smiled at Ellie as she got up from the couch. Before she left the room, she squeezed Kara's arm once again and whispered, "Its going to be okay. I'm with you."

Kara smiled and nodded, biting back tears as her sister finally left. She then looked at Ellie, who was also looking at her, expectancy and excitement in those ocean blue eyes. 

"Come on." Kara offered her hand to her daughter, "Let's go home."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, kara remembers about her past and learns that people eat duck in china

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for all the kudos and the comments on the last one!

Kara held Ellie's hand tight as they walked in silence. 

It felt a bit awkward at first, since Kara had so many things she could ask Ellie, she didn't know anything about how the last seven years had been, she had so many questions but at the same time every time she looked at Ellie she panicked, couldn't get any words to come out of her mouth. Ellie on the other hand didn't seem to be bothered with the silence between them, her eyes were tracing every inch of her surroundings, so curious about all the aspects of the new and unknown world around her. The bookstore, the ice cream parlor, the park, and, of course, the coffee shop, that always brought the same moment back to Kara's mind whenever she passed by it. 

She had vivid memories of her first week in National City, when she moved in with Alex because she didn't have the time or the means to rent her own place when she got the job at CatCo. She really wasn't expecting to actually get the job, the interview was rather embarrassing, but as soon as she got it she was just so desperate to keep it because the position of Cat Grant's assistant was available almost every month and Kara didn't want to be one more that didn't last. The first few days were stressful for both Kara and Alex, since they were sharing the same space again and Kara simply ate all the food available in the house and occupied more than half of the double bed they were supposed to share, but everything worked out in the end. 

Then Kara made her first mistake since she started to work for Cat, with the irony of that happening right after Kara was so happy about her perfect record that she went to a bar to celebrate, even though she only had three friends in town, including her sister, and also couldn't get drunk, but at least she could still enjoy the evening out. The day in question started chilly, but it got significantly warmer as the hours passed and when Kara left the building to buy Cat her afternoon round of coffee, she left her coat hanging on her chair, the money that was supposed to pay for her order inside it's pockets. The barista at the coffee shop had just started there and she didn't know Kara, she wouldn't let her take the coffee and bring the money later. She was ready to accept her defeat and prepare herself for whatever doomed ending Cat would plan for her as soon as she returned empty handed when someone touched her shoulder, offering to pay for her order. She turned towards them, and found herself astonished when her blue eyes met the green ones of the well known younger Luthor. Lena Luthor. She wasn't in the spotlight as much as her brother was, but as soon as she was announced as the head of LuthorCorp's new office in National City, she was in the news for a while. 

And she was just so astonishingly beautiful. It was one thing to see her through a screen or on a printed page, another thing was looking at her directly while she gave Kara a warm smile. When Kara finally regained the ability of speech, she thanked Lena repeatedly for the coffee and asked her when it would be a good time for Kara to pay her back. Lena's response was that she would only accept payment in coffee. Kara laughed, but she was there again on the next day, at the same coffee shop, but this time with money on her pocket and time to sit and talk. 

And, when Kara finally reached the building where she lived, she was failing again at her daily mission of convincing herself that she did the right thing when she broke up with Lena. Of course she didn't.

But she didn't have time to dwell onto that, since she had more imminent things to worry about. 

She was holding hands with her daughter. 

Her daughter. A little girl who was clearly really excited to finally meet her, and Kara had no idea of what to do to not be a disappointment. About children, she was no natural with them. She never really thought over the possibility of having kids, not even while she was dating Lena. The only thing she knew for certain was that she wasn't prepared. Her apartment was small, she only had one bedroom. She had two jobs. She didn't know any bedtime stories. She didn't eat healthy, not that it made much of a difference for her as an alien but still. 

She stopped in front of her door and Ellie waited patiently while she looked for the keys. When the door was open, Kara opened space for Ellie to enter first. Since she was facing the opposite direction, her expression was a mystery to Kara, but she could tell Ellie was surprised, since her apartment was really small and the little girl probably lived somewhere four times bigger.

"Well, welcome home." Kara said awkwardly as she put Ellie's backpack on the kitchen counter.

"It's so colorful! In my house everything is black, white, or some other color that looks sad. And I can see the whole house from here." Ellie turned towards Kara with a smile, "In my house, whenever I have a nightmare I have to run through this huge dark hallway just to get to mom's room. Once I was so scared I went flying and broke the door"

"Oh Rao." Kara's eyes widened then she let out a small laugh, "I bet Lena wasn't happy."

"No." Ellie laughed too, but slowly her smile faded, "I mean, she never fights me when things like this happen because she knows it wasn't on purpose, but I don't like breaking things. I don't like when I do things I didn't mean to."

Kara saw so much of herself in those words. She would never forget the nights she cried, fearing that Eliza and Jeremiah would get rid of her after she repeatedly broke things around the house. 

"You need to be patient with yourself. It takes time to adapt to how strong you are and how fragile everything else is." Kara reassured her and Ellie's smile was back in place, "Now, are you hungry?"

"Yes!" 

"I was supposed to do the groceries..." Kara opened the cabinets to find not much inside, "Well, I'm gonna have to order food for us."

"Can It be Chinese?"

"You're thinking about potstickers aren't you." Kara smirked and Ellie looked guilty, "I knew it."

"We'll see who eats the most." She challenged her. 

"Oh, you're on." Kara laughed as she dialed the very known number of the Chinese restaurant. As she ordered an alarming amount of food for two ordinary people but probably just the right quantity for both of them, she watched Ellie go around the house to get a better look at the small details and thought about how things were going so natural and easy with Ellie. She was scared at first, but then she started to question herself on why did having her daughter around felt so much like home? 

"Who are these?" Ellie asked as soon as Kara was off the phone. She was pointing at the numerous pictures disposed in frames on Kara's bookshelf.

"These are my friends." Kara approached her, taking a closer look at the many pictures, most of them were taken on game night, some of them didn't even have Kara on them but she loved keeping all the happy moments around her. Except for the pictures of Lena, that were destroyed by Kara's heat vision on a day of rage and regret. She picked up the only picture that had everyone on it, at least everyone who was still around and Ellie would probably get to know later, it was taken by J'onn who held the camera smiling while he tried to fit everyone on the couch on the frame. It had been taken about a few months ago, "These two hugging are Brainy and Nia, Brainy works at the DEO with Alex, Nia works at CatCo with me. The one taking the picture is J'onn, who also works at the DEO, he is like a father to me and Alex, always watching over us. You know Alex, this one with the arms around her shoulder is her wife, Sam, and this girl here is their daughter, Ruby. We are usually together on game nights, that mostly happen on a weekly basis."

"Game nights?"

"Yeah, we play many different board games together. We'll probably have one this week, so you'll experience it. It's a lot of fun." Kara smiled at Ellie, but the little girl just kept staring at the pictures. 

"You have so many friends, Kara. I wish my mom had that many friends so we could have game night too. These games aren't as fun with only two people playing." Those words hit Kara hard in the chest, but before she could say anything, Ellie continued, "Wait, I know her."

Kara saw that she was pointing at Sam.

"Yeah?"

"I was... Um..." Ellie hesitated, staring at her shoes as she always did when she was nervous, "Messing with mom's things once, and I found a picture of them together. Were they friends?"

"Yes." Kara answered, carefully, "They've known each other since they were kids. Alex actually met Sam through your mother."

"Then why they don't talk anymore? Did they fight too like you two did?" Ellie asked.

There it was. Kara knew it was only a matter of time until Ellie started to ask hard questions, just didn't imagine it would be so soon.

"They didn't exactly fight. It's just... I don't think... It's just that when people split up, everything around them end up splitting too, I guess." Kara tried to find the right words to explain, "And then split ups make people sad. And sometimes they just don't want to talk to each other."

Ellie looked at her as if she didn't understand a single word that Kara said.

"I don't get it."

"It's complicated, I..." Kara sighed, how could she possibly tell Ellie how everything went incredibly wrong? How she broke up with her mother, who then didn't want to hear from Kara or anyone related to her, including her best friend, Sam, who was about to become Kara's sister-in-law at the time?

"It's okay. Don't be upset." Ellie pressed her lips, clearly frustrated with the lack of answer she received but understanding towards Kara. 

"I'm sorry. How about we talk about something else? For example, I really want to know how did you start liking cooking"

"Okay!" The change in the subject was welcomed and Kara felt extremely relieved. They sat together on the couch, Kara unsure of how close she should be, so they had a significant distance between them, "I was having a noisy day. Like, everything was so loud I could hear everything that was happening the building and on the streets and my head hurt and I cried, a lot. It happened sometimes, It doesn't happen that often anymore, just when something really loud goes off, like the fire alarm when I let something burn by accident." Ellie explained and Kara felt her chest tighten. She really had a hard time with her powers, maybe a harder time than Kara had, "I was with my mom on the bed, she was hugging me really tight, that usually helps the noises go away. The TV was on without sound, and there was this woman teaching how to make Eggplant Lasagna. It caught my attention enough for the noises to stop, and the next day I asked mom if we could try to make it. And we had the best time cooking together, I wanted to cook together everyday!" Kara's chest felt gradually lighter as Ellie's excitement grew while she talked, "I was happy we had something to do together, because science is hard and that is what she is doing all the time. I studied a lot and now I now many things about cooking that even she doesn't! It's so cool, because she knows a lot about everything."

"That's amazing. It's really good that you've found something you like that much so early in your life. I only realized I wanted to be a reporter when I was already on the same environment as them." Kara told her, keeping for herself the part where Lena unintentionally triggered Kara's pursue of journalism with a joke during a lunch date, when they were already dating for a couple of months. The moment Lena mentioned it, it was like Kara's path was clear from the start. She was a reporter, she was a seeker of justice and truth and, back then, she couldn't do it as a superhero, but she could do it by telling the people the stories that needed to be told. It became even more certain when she talked to Cat about it, and her boss just rolled her eyes and handed her the envelope with her resume, where Cat had written the word "reporter" over in a red marker. She knew from the start what was Kara's calling, and Kara just needed that little push to figure it out.

One more thing to thank Lena for. 

The doorbell rang and Kara checked through the door using her x-ray vision just to be sure if it was their food. That confirmed, she walked towards the door to pick it up. When she turned towards Ellie again, she found her in front of the shelf with her trusty notebook, looking at the photos then writing something down as if she was doing some kind of scientific research, probably writing their names and any other aspect she found interesting. Kara found herself smiling as she put all the boxes of food on the coffee table between the couch and the TV. 

"Are you ready?" Kara called Ellie's attention back to her, and the girl gave her a defiant look.

"Of course." She put the notebook aside and sat back on the sofa, watching as Kara opened the boxes. The awkward silence started setting as they ate. Kara's attention was more towards Ellie than towards her own food, the girl ate slowly, as if it was important to her to feel every single bit of the different flavors and seasonings. She sometimes felt the texture with a curious look before actually putting the food inside her mouth. It was kind of fascinating, and Kara felt extremely weird to be paying attention to such small details. 

"So, Um... How's school?" She thought of the most adequate question for a mother to ask. 

"At first I was super excited because it looked like a castle, just like Harry Potter, but I hate it there." Ellie told her, "Everyone is mean to me because I don't keep up."

"You don't keep up?"

"No. Some subjects are kind of hard, my mom helps me with my homework but at school I have to do it all by myself and I don't do it very well. If I like cooking why can't I just cook? Why do I have to know the perimeter area of a shape?" 

"That's what you're learning at school? I thought you were on... The second grade?"

"Yeah but there where I study they're advanced." Ellie sighed, "I try not to complain much to my mom because I know she only wants me to be safer in a place with fewer people."

"Well, we have to learn a little bit of everything, at least until you get older, than we can start choosing your own paths. But, about the school... I could try to talk to your mom about it, we could figure something out." The grin that grew on Ellie's face made Kara feel like she had just saved the world. Kara understood Lena's worries about Ellie's safety, but did she really have to suffer that much in return? Kara went to a ordinary school with her sister and, even though she also had a few problems fitting in, she was able to go through it just fine. 

Kara's mind went to darker spaces after that. She had no idea of how things were going to be when she met Lena again. What if things didn't change? What if she didn't let Kara get a say in anything regarding Ellie? She couldn't just take Ellie back to metropolis, right? At least not after Kara watching her without notice (not even about her existence) while Lena spent a week Rao knows where. 

"Kara.", Her daughter's voice brought her mind back to the safety of the room, "Can I turn on the TV?"

"Oh, yeah, sure." Kara leaned forward to reach the remote and handed it to Ellie, who turned the TV on and switched channels until she found what she was looking for. Kara analyzed it for a few seconds before she identified what it was, "Masterchef. I imagine you watch a lot of these shows."

"I do! I love Masterchef! It's kind of fun to see they messing up simple things, I can also learn a few stuff."

"This doesn't look that simple to me." Kara laughed, "What are they even cooking? Is that a... very different chicken?"

"They're cooking duck." Ellie said as if it was obvious and the confusion in Kara's face made the girl laugh, "It's not common around here but people eat it all the time in China."

"Oh." Kara was staring at the TV astonished, not with the information itself but with the fact that Ellie, who was so young, knew that.

"I also like Hell's Kitchen, even though the screaming guy makes me a little nervous sometimes. I don't think I would ever want to go to these things, to cook under a clock. Food takes time. And I'm messy." Ellie told her, Kara remembered hearing from her that she was messy before, "And there's Cake Boss! I love making deserts, specially the frosting so it looks pretty. Wanna see the birthday cake I made for my mom?"

"I... Sure. Show me." Kara accepted and as she watched Ellie looking for her phone she strongly wished that the picture had the cake and only the cake. 

And, of course, it didn't. 

The cake was placed in the middle of a glass table, it was round and covered with chocolate frosting, colored sprinkles with many different forms such as stars and hearts. The only thing about it that gave away a child was the one who made it was the letters that composed the "Happy Birthday" on top of it with obvious childish tracings. Lena was behind the cake, she was wearing a party hat and an over sized black t-shirt, the biggest smile on her face while her green eyes were looking at the candles below her as she leaned over them to blow them out. 

It was unbelievable how beautiful that woman looked. Kara clearly always loved Lena's CEO mode with all the dresses and the suits and the dark lipstick, the echoing sound of her heels against the floor. But that Lena, casual Lena, real Lena, was the one that had her heart. 

"Looks amazing." Kara said without taking her eyes off the picture, not sure if she was talking about the cake, or Lena, or both. 

The doorbell rang again and Kara's attention turned towards the door. This time, she didn't have to check through the walls to know that it was Alex, Ruby and Sam outside, she could hear their voices from where she was.

"Alex is here." Kara told Ellie before getting up from the couch to answer the door. As soon as she opened, their voices went silent as the three of them just stared at Kara with eyes slightly widened. She was sure all of them were thinking dozens of things at once, but apparently no one was able to get a single word out, "Are you guys going to... come in or?"

"Sure, yeah, sorry." Sam forced a smile to wave off the awkward moment and she was the first one to set foot inside the apartment. She was also the first one to look at Ellie from where she was, the little girl looking even smaller while she was seated on the couch. Sam couldn't help but speechlessly stare at her, as if she didn't believe the girl was real until that very moment.

Ellie was looking back at her, but she didn't move or say anything.

"Okay, so... Sam, Ruby, this is Ellie." Kara pointed the obvious as she walked back to the living room. 

"Hi." Ruby shyly said as she followed the adults to the living room, but no one sat down.

"Hey." Ellie answered in the same tone.

"So, you're the Chef Ellie I heard about." Sam smiled at her and Ellie returned it, somewhat surprised with Sam's words. Kara looked inquisitively at Alex, who winked.

"And you're Alex wife. And my mom's friend from childhood who doesn't speak to her anymore." Ellie basically reported everything she knew about Sam, who was definitely not expecting such a direct approach. Apparently, she didn't seem to feel offended or taken aback, Ellie's tone wasn't sharp and she knew very well how children had no filter. Still, Kara rushed to explain.

"She saw a picture on the shelf and recognized you, so I tried to explain-"

"That's alright, Kara." Sam reassured her, her eyes looking alarmed at the excessive amount of food in front of her, "I assume you guys weren't thinking about us when you ordered all of this, right?"

"No, but you can still eat it." Kara laughed. 

"Ruby, weren't you going to show Ellie that game on your Switch?", Alex said, hiding the obvious second intentions behind that sentence really badly, but Ellie didn't seem to notice or, if she noticed, she didn't care. Ruby looked back at Alex, with flustered cheeks and Kara gave her an apologetic look, "I told her how may games you have on your phone, Ellie, so she thought you might like some of the ones she has." 

"I have a Switch too but couldn't bring mine with me." Ellie told them.

"Why?" Ruby asked her, sitting by Ellie's side so they could talk. 

"Um... I... forgot. What color is yours?" 

"Mine is the blue one, I'll show you." Ruby raised her hand towards Sam, who gave her the purse that probably had the videogame inside it. 

The three adults exchanged looks before walking cautiously towards the kitchen and the girl's voices started to fade. Kara made sure of grabbing one of the potstickers boxes on the way. 

"How are things going?", Sam almost whispered, the kitchen wasn't far at all from the living room so if they really wanted their conversation to be private they had to speak in the lowest possible tone and make sure the kryptonian child's attention was somewhere else.

"Fine so far. I mean, I still have no Idea of what to do but we're getting along. We talked a little more. She hates her school." Kara nervously ate a potsticker and Sam looked at her slightly confused with the unconnected information in the end of her statement. 

"I am so angry at Lena." Alex let out as she probably looked for alcohol inside the fridge. Luckily, there was still some beer left from the last game night they had. Sam's eyes over her wife were full of reprehension, and Kara could sense only pure stress emanating from her sister's body, "How could she do that? To you, to her own daughter? I can't even imagine what she must be thinking right now. Why does she think you were never around? Have you stopped to think about it?"

"Alex..."

"I'm serious, Kara! Not only did she hid your own daughter's existence from you but she also just dropped the girl on your hands out of nowhere expecting you to play parent after keeping you from doing it for so many years! How come you're not even a little bit angry?"

Kara just looked at Alex, wordless, but her eyes said everything that needed to be said. 

"You're feeling like you deserve it, don't you?" 

Kara sighed and stared at the floor. 

"Kara!" She screamed her sister's name and both Sam's and Kara's eyes widened. The three of them peaked simultaneously at the living room and both Ruby and Ellie seemed concentrated on whatever they were playing. Then, Alex continued in a lower tone, "Kara, you didn't deserve this. This was too much. The moment there was a child involved everything changed."

"Alex, we both know very well how my mind was back then. If Lena told me she was pregnant I would probably have told her with even more certainty to leave me." 

Alex grimaced. She wanted to disagree, but she knew her sister was right. What happened eight years ago caused a strong impact on all of them, but three people in particular were the most damaged ones. 

"Babe. Let's calm down for a second. We didn't come here to throw stones at Lena." Sam's gentle touch over Alex's shoulders was enough for her to put her guard down. The sip she took form her cold beer may have also helped a little. 

"No. I'm sorry Kara. I'm just... So angry, you know? I loved her too, okay? I missed her too. I know she was heartbroken but I just wish she handled things differently, now more than ever."

"I know." Kara smiled sadly, and the tension around them slowly started to cease. There were a few seconds of silence, before Kara finally let out what was actually on her mind, "I think... I think it took me seconds to love her. To love Ellie. Is that strange?" 

"It was the same thing for me when I met Ruby." Alex told her and a smile grew on Sam's face, "I was so scared, because I had already fallen for Sam and I was like, what if her daughter hates me? What if I hate her? But when I picked her up for the first time and then she touched my cheeks with those warm and ridiculously little toddler hands I knew I loved her and I wanted to be her mother too."

"I think that moment for me was when she touched my suit's crest and she knew what it meant. And when I said what it meant in my language she said it back. She said it back." Kara's blue eyes were glimmering but she kept the tears inside, otherwise she would just be crying all night. 

The amount of affection she developed for Ellie in such short amount of time was frightening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> special thanks to barbara for being my beta reader


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, kara and ellie work as a team

"Okay, I think it's time for us to head home." Sam declared after Alex's fourth attempt to make a joke. In her defense, everyone laughed, but they did it exactly for not understanding, "Before I have to carry Alex to the car.

"Babe, come on. I'm not that drunk." Alex smiled innocently at her and Sam just rolled her eyes, but it was clear she wasn't actually mad. Kara couldn't even remember the last time those two had an actual fight. 

"Sure, you've been drunker, but do we want to reach that point? I'ts the middle of the week." 

"You're absolutely and completely right. Let's go." Alex got up from the couch a little too fast considering the alcohol level in her blood, but, luckily, her sister's reflexes were impeccable and she was up and holding Alex by her shoulders in milliseconds, "Goodbye, Ellie, and welcome to the Danvers."

"Thanks, Auntie Alex." Ellie grinned and Alex gulped, looking at Kara with wet eyes.

"I'm an Auntie now." She realized and Kara couldn't help but laugh at how emotional Alex got even when she was minimally drunk. 

"Yeah, you are. Let me help you to the door." Kara was smiling as she walked side by side with Alex in the direction of the front door, making sure her sister wouldn't loose her balance. 

"See you later. You're really good at Mario Kart. But I'm still better." Ruby joked and Ellie faked an annoyed look, then both of them giggled.

Sam was the last one to get up from the couch. As everyone said their goodbyes, she just stared at Ellie, clearly wanting to say something but not sure if she should. 

"Ellie." She called the girl's attention towards her after taking a deep breath, "I'm really glad your mom hasn't been alone all these years. That she had you. Thanks for taking care of her."

Ellie offered her a genuine smile as Sam caressed her golden hair.

"Bye, Auntie Sam." She waved when Sam followed her family out of the apartment. Kara was waiting for her by the door, Alex was still on the hallway, leaning her back against the wall as she waited for her wife so they could go downstairs together while Ruby was ahead of them, on her way downstairs.

"Thank you guys for coming here today." Kara thanked them as Sam wrapped her in a tight hug.

"We're here for you, whatever you need." Alex assured her.

"Oh, Kara, just one thing: This is usually the time that a 7 year old should be in bed." Sam winked.

"Sure. Yeah. Time to bed." Kara nervously nodded. 

"Good luck." Sam laughed lightly and took Alex's hand on hers, both of them walking together towards the exit. Kara waited until they disappeared from her view before actually closing and locking the door. 

Kara sighed and looked at Ellie, whose tired eyes were looking at the TV as she rested her head on her shoulders. 

"Okay, so... I think it's time we get some rest. Are you tired?"

"Not much." Ellie answer was followed by a yawn, "Okay, maybe a little."

"Right." Kara laughed, "Why don't you put some pajamas on while I make the bed for you?"

"Alright." Ellie agreed and got up from the couch, pulling her backpack with her as she walked towards the bathroom. When she closed the door, Kara walked to her bedroom and replaced the sheets on the bed for clean ones, also left a blanked over it. Then she took a blanket for herself and also a couple of pillows and left them on the couch. She was lucky her back was made of steel or she would have a hard time sleeping there, since her couch wasn't one of those that could make a decent bed. She then proceeded to clean the coffee table from the boxes of food and the beer bottles. When she was all finished, Ellie left the bathroom now wearing yellow shorts and a long sleeved shirt full of giraffes, she also had no glasses on, holding them on her right hand, "I'm ready."

"Okay." Kara nodded, but it took her a couple of seconds to realize that she would actually have to put Ellie to bed. So she walked to the bedroom with the girl following her closely. When they were inside, Ellie put her glasses over the night table and then levitated just enough for her to climb on the bed without difficulties, but Kara's heart skipped a beat when she witnessed her daughter actually using her powers for the first time. 

"Can you tell me a story? And can I choose what the story is about? And can It be about how was it when you left krypton?" Ellie asked.

"I can see you had this in your mind for a while." Kara laughed and Ellie gave her a pleading look, "Listen, I don't know if... This is an appropriate bedtime story."

"Please, Kara." How could Kara say no to those sleepy blue eyes?

"Okay, Okay..." Kara sat on the bed while Ellie smiled victorious as she laid down and rest her head on the pillow, "So... Um... Things were... Chaotic. Everything was trembling, and falling apart. My parents took me to the flight platform, where Kal-El's parents were already saying goodbye to him before they launched the pod into space, it's course set to earth. He was just an infant back then."

"And they sent him all alone?" Ellie questioned.

"Well, the pod was made for only one person, but my parents were sending me right behind him, to protect and care for him in this new planet. My mother..." Kara took a pause trying to push back the memories of the tears falling down her mother's face as she said her last words to her, "My mother told me that I would have powers on earth because of the yellow sun."

"Wait, the sun wasn't yellow on Krypton?"

"No, it was red. There are some planets out there with red suns and on them I... We, have no powers."

"And what happened next?"

"As my pod took off, krypton exploded, and it's explosion sent a shock wave that knocked my pod off the course and into the phantom zone, a place in space where time doesn't pass." 

"You saw krypton explode?"

"I did."

"I would be really really sad if earth exploded... And if my mom sent me away."

"Yeah. It was.... Really hard for me." Kara couldn't even begin to put into words how it felt to see everything she knew, everyone she loved, be blown away before her eyes, "I spent 24 years on the phantom zone, I slept the whole time so I don't really remember anything. Then, somehow I ended up on earth and my cousin Kal, that had already grown into a man, found me. He was also already Superman at the time. And I was still a 13 year old girl."

"Whoa, so you're actually older than Superman"

"Technically." 

"Then instead of you taking care of him, he took care of you?" 

"Well... He wanted me to have a normal childhood like he had, so he took me to the Danvers. He trusted them, he knew that they would take care of me, and they did. They helped me through my hardest times, adapting to a new wol."

"Alex's family?" Ellie asked and Kara nodded.

"Eliza and Jeremiah. But... Jeremiah... He died." Kara decided to not go deeper than that into that subject, "Not too long after I arrived, so it has been just the three of us."

Ellie just stared at Kara for a few seconds with thoughtful blue eyes before she leaned towards her mother and gave her a hug. 

At first, Kara was frozen into place, her heart racing against her chest. She wasn't expecting such direct contact, it hit her like a truck but after blinking a few times to get herself together, she wrapped the little girl in her arms. It was unbelievable how kind, caring and incredibly smart Ellie was, Kara barely believed that she was real even though she was felling the girl's body against hers. 

"I'm really sorry, Kara." Ellie whispered.

"It's okay. I'll always have krypton in my mind and in my heart. And now I have a little bit of it in you too." Kara smiled at her when she pulled away from her hug, "Now you go to sleep, little girl."

"Goodnight, Kara." Ellie mumbled as she covered herself with the blanked, visibly tired now.

"Goodnight, Ellie."

Kara couldn't sleep. 

The uncomfortable couch only held a minimal part of the blame but for most part it was her mind, that just didn't want to shut down. 

She kept thinking about how everything would have been different without the incident of eight years ago. She would have been with Lena when she found out she was pregnant, she actually pictured in her mind exactly how that would've happened, Lena would show her the pharmacy test from across the living room as soon as Kara came home from work, because she was so excited herself she just couldn't wait, and Kara, after a few seconds to comprehend what that meant, would just run towards her to hug her, spinning her around the house as she kissed her deeply. They would have to move into Lena's apartment, since it had multiple bedrooms for them to choose which one would belong to the baby and Lena had been living with Kara but she constantly had to travel between one house and another for her clothes, that single handedly would occupy the whole space of Kara's bedroom. 

Then they would paint the bedroom together, Lena would probably go with baby blue for the walls, since it was Kara's favorite color, and they would end up doing a poor job since most of the time they would just try to playfully paint each other, but then, after Lena had fallen asleep on the couch, Kara would go back there to polish and finish everything. They would go shopping for baby stuff and Kara would not be able to restrain Lena's total lack of awareness to the price tags while picking things out. Lena would stick to the useful stuff such as the cribs and the clothes while Kara would loose herself in toys, stuffed animals and baby costumes.

They would have a baby shower just for the sake of tradition and to have their friends and family around. And, when the baby came, Kara would have to keep herself together to just not fly with Lena to the nearest hospital. But everything would go just fine and they would have Ellie in their worlds by the end of the day. Kara would sing her lullabies from Krypton, the ones that her mother used to sing to her and the ones that she hear her aunt sing to Kal so he could sleep peacefully. She imagined that her powers would start to show around one year after she was born, Lena would call her desperate saying the Ellie just didn't want to get down from the ceiling. Kara would laugh through the phone but eventually she would run to her daughter's rescue. She imagined that her first word had to be darling, because that's how Lena called Kara all the time. They would go to the ice cream parlor together as soon as Ellie was old enough to eat ice cream, her mothers laughing at her while she struggled to get the ice cream inside her mouth rather than outside and failing miserably. 

"Kara! Kara! Wake up!" Ellie's voice brought Kara back to consciousness, she wasn't sure at what point her daydream became an actual dream, but it was already sunny outside. Her eyes reached the clock on the wall above the TV, it wasn't even 8AM yet. 

"Aren't you an early bird?" Kara smiled as she rubbed the sleep out of her eyes. She dreamed about the perfect life she could've had, then she woke up to the only thing about the dream that was actually real and, even if it was only one thing, she was endlessly grateful to have her.

"I made you breakfast! It's pancakes because it was all I could do with what I found on the kitchen." It was only then when Kara noticed the amazing smell inside her apartment. She sat down on the couch, Ellie looked at her with expectancy while fidgeting with her fingers. Kara laughed at that and finally stood up, but she didn't even have to actually reach the kitchen to see the size of the chaos. There was flour everywhere, on the table, on the floor, on the stove. The counters had multiple fingerprints all around them, and how many pans can you possibly need to prepare pancakes for Rao's sake? 

And, in the middle of the destruction, there was a plate on the table with four stacked pancakes covered with melted chocolate. They looked as good as they smelled.

"Ellie..." Kara didn't know what to say. She wasn't angry at the mess, just shocked. Even after the girl warned her more than once abou her small quirk. 

"I'm sorry. I know I made a mess but I'll help clean up." Ellie stared at her feet, embarrassed.

"Well... It's okay, It's nothing we can't fix later." Kara assured her, squeezing her shoulder, "Now, these pancakes look great!"

Ellie watched closely as her mother sat in front of the plate, grabbing the fork that Ellie left strategically right next to the food. Her eyes widened as soon as she had the first bite, the texture was soft, it had the right amount of sweetness that fit perfectly with the chocolate.

"Wow. This is amazing. Like, really amazing. How did you even do this?" Kara asked incredulously as she continued eating the best pancakes she had ever tasted. 

"Pancakes are actually one of the most simple things to prepare. I just followed the recipe."

"But these are no ordinary pancakes... You've just ruined all other pancakes in the world to me, thank you very much." Ellie laughed aloud at that and Kara smiled just at the sight of her making her daughter feel happy about herself, "Did you eat already?"

"Yep."

"Okay, so..." Kara checked the clock once again even though she did it seconds ago, "I need to go to work, want to take a shower while I eat?"

"I'm coming with you?"

"Is that okay?" Kara asked, but she didn't really have any other option. Everyone she knew that could possibly take care of Ellie was at work. There was Ruby who was on her school break but Kara didn't feel comfortable making one kid babysit another. 

"Yeah. It's just that my mom didn't take me to work with her, never." Ellie told her. Of course Lena didn't take her, or people would obviously speculate about who the little girl with her was, "I'm going then!"

"Okay. And thank you for breakfast!" Kara screamed the last part since her daughter just ran towards the bathroom with excitement, laughing when she apparently shut the door without even hearing what Kara said. It was lovely that Ellie seemed happy to do whatever Kara proposed. She took a deep breath at the mess around her, but she would have it all cleaned up within minutes if she used her super speed.

The kitchen was already cleaned up when Ellie left the bathroom. She was dressed in blue shorts and a stripped orange and white oversized sweater, also had the same purple all stars from the day before. She asked for Kara's help to tie her curly hair in a bun and, which made Kara slightly tremble on her feet even though it wasn't a hard request. Whatever task that made Kara feel like a mother was enough to give her chills, but she took a deep breath and did what Ellie asked, tying her hair on the top of her head, some strands of golden hair falling off from the bun even though she tried to avoid it, but it was the best she could do and Ellie didn't seem bothered. Kara then proceeded to get herself ready for work, she showered faster than Ellie did and they were on their way to CatCo before 9. Kara was nervous about how people would react to Ellie's presence due to the events of the day before, but, when they stepped out of the elevator, people just kept doing their jobs after giving them a look or two. 

"Kara! Hey! You didn't come in yesterday, I was worried, because we had that- Oh, hi, hi kid." Nia spoke in fast pace as soon as Kara put her purse on her table, her attention turning towards Ellie as soon as she put her eyes on the girl, who had already taken over Kara's chair. 

"Hi, Nia from the game night picture!" Ellie recognized her and Kara smiled while Nia gave the girl a confused look.

"Nia, this is-"

"Kara!" Cat Grant's voice was, of course, above everyone else's in that floor. Kara looked straight to her office where she remained sat down and with her eyes on whatever she was reading, Cat hasn't called her like that since Kara became a reporter, so Kara feared whatever would come next.

"Ellie, I'll be right back. Introduce yourself to Nia." Kara winked at her daughter before walking towards Cat's office, giving it a look towards her daughter in time to see Nia's shock face when she probably told her Kara was her mother. When she closed the glass dor behind her, Cat's eyes finally lifted from the paper on her hands to stare at Kara.

"What the hell is going on?" She asked slowly, not giving any further explanations since it was obvious what she was referring to. 

"Well... Ellie is my daughter. And Lena's daughter. Our daughter. But I didn't know about her until yesterday because well, you know, I didn't have any contact with Lena for the past few years. I have to take care of Ellie this week. That's about everything." Kara nervously explained and Cat just looked at her as if everything she said was in another language. Then she fixed her glasses, looked back at the paper on her hands and then back at Kara. 

Of course Cat knew that Kara was Supergirl. She managed to hid it during the first few months after her debut, even with Cat fussing over her wanting interviews and digging on every little piece of evidence to find out more about her, although Kara didn't really know until what point Cat was just pretending to not know, but things got easier for her after her boss knew that whenever she vanished from work she was probably out there saving lives. At first, Cat's reaction was to fire her, she needed all the time she could get to keep the city and the world safe, but she hired her again after Kara was able to convince her of how important being Kara Danvers was for her. Eventually, Cat became more than a mentor figure for Kara, she became a friend. 

"You're telling me you got Lena Luthor pregnant?" Cat started to bite the back of a pen.

"... Yes."

"Congratulations."

"Thank you?"

"How did she possibly hide this from the press" Cat's eyes were lost, as if she was talking to herself rather than to Kara, "I mean, she has been in the shadows since she moved back, just making extremely necessary appearances and I strongly believed it was due to the heartbreak after the breakup but... Wow. The Luthor knows her ways. I'm impressed. People don't impress me."

"Miss Grant." Kara started, afraid that Cat saw Ellie like the huge story CatCo would be the first to tell the world, "I would really, really appreciate we could kept things that way."

"Kara. How do you think that that girl's face and name isn't printed in every single newspaper out there already?" Cat's glasses were in the middle of her face again, of her eyebrows arched as she stared at Kara, "I threatened to destroy the career of whomever responsible for even a single rumor about it as soon as you left yesterday."

"Thank you. Really, thank you. Ellie doesn't really know the dimension of her name and-"

"Tell me" Cat interrupted her, clearly couldn't care less about what Ellie was or not aware of, "How was your first conversation with Lena Luthor eight years and a hidden daughter later?"

"I'll tell you when it happens." Kara muttered.

"Are you serious? She didn't even speak to you? It gets better and better, It kills me to keep this between us. I must really like you, Kara." Cat was repeatedly rolling her eyes, as if she was disgusted at herself, but Kara smiled, "One last thing. How are going to handle being here, being out there and being with baby Supergirl?" 

"Well I-"

"You're going to ask for the week off?"

No, she wasn't. But it sounded good. It would make things easier.

"Please?"

"Get out of here. And your daughter is cute." 

"Thank you, Miss Grant."

"Just one more thing." Cat called back her attention when Kara got up from the chair, "You know you two can't keep this up forever, right? The bigger she gets, the harder it will be to hide."

"I know. We'll figure something out. But for now..."

"Whenever Lena Luthor wants to explain where she kept her daughter all these years, you send her to me first. Now you're free to go." 

That went well enough, Kara thought with herself as she left the office. The only thing she would have to worry about was some bad guy wreaking havoc in National City. 

"Ellie, good news, we can go grocery shopping today." Kara smiled when she was back at her desk. Nia was still there, she held her breath when Kara got close and stared at her with slightly widened eyes. 

"Yes!" Ellie cheered, immediately getting up from her chair, "We get to go to the supermarket? Like, actually go there and pick stuff like they do on Masterchef before they cook?"

"Yep. That's exactly what we're doing."

"So... I don't talk to you for a day and you have a daughter now?" Nia's comment made Kara laugh, "Are you okay? I mean... This is huge."

"I am okay. I truly am." Kara smiled and Nia smiled back, still a little bit shocked with the information, but relieved to see that Kara actually looked like she was happy. Kara woke up that day feeling... Different. Lighter, "I'm going to be off for a week, but I could still help you if you need me."

"Oh, no no, I can handle it. You stay with your daughter." Nia assured her. 

"I'll see you at game night, then?"

"Oh, yeah, I wouldn't miss it. She said she would make me burritos." Nia looked at Ellie, who nodded in confirmation. Nia then whispered, "Can she actually do that?"

"You'll be surprised." Kara smiled, "Come on, little girl. Let's go."

Going to the supermarket was... An experience. Ellie had never been to one, which was part of the reason she was so excited. Kara let her inside the cart and she led them both through the sessions as a captain on her ship. She had pretty much the same impulses as every other kid, wanted to get everything they passed by, with the minor difference that, instead of chocolate or cookies, she wanted vegetables, seasoning, meat, and started to plan a number of dishes that were about three times the meals they would have for the rest of the week. Luckily, it didn't take Kara much to convince her that they didn't need to buy all those things at once. 

They spent a few hours there before heading home, a taxi was needed to handle the amount of shopping bags, that was a big one even after she convinced Ellie they didn't need to buy everything she thought they did. 

"I could help you." Ellie offered. She was sat on the corner of the table, eating a bag of chips while she watched Kara put all the groceries on its places inside the cabinets. She hadn't ask for Ellie's help, first because she had no idea of where to put things anyways, and second because she had something else in mind. 

"Actually, I have another job for you." Kara told her, Ellie's blue eyes immediately sparkled with curiosity.

"What is it?"

"I want you to teach me how to cook duck." Kara turned at her with a smiled and Ellie seemed surprised.

"Really?"

"Yeah. I got one when you weren't looking." She opened one of the bags and took the meat out of it, putting it over the counter, "Think you can do it?"

"Of course!" Ellie got down from the table, Kara smiling at her while she excitedly searched for stuff inside the shopping bags. She took a handful of seasonings from one of them, "So, we're going to need these, and... Potatoes! Roasted duck goes great with potatoes."

"Okay. Lead the way."

"Wash your hands, it's really important." Ellie commanded and Kara nodded, following the girl's orders as she gave them, "Then we have to wash the duck, a lot."

"Yes, boss." 

"Remember when I said I always follow the recipe?" Ellie asked her after she apparently had all the ingredients on the counter. Kara had just finished washing the meat by then, "So, that wasn't a lie but I actually... I cheat a little. Sometimes"

"What?" Kara laughed, waiting for Ellie to reveal whatever she was keeping.

"Duck is better if its crispy, and the best way to do it is freezing it. But then we need it to be in room temperature so we can actually start to prepare it. I don't have freeze breath like you, but I do have laser vision, so I usually freeze it in the fridge, and then unfreeze really fast with my eyes. But you're here now."

"Oh.... I see it." Kara laughed a little more, "Okay, let's do this."

Kara followed the instructions and froze the meat. Right after that, Ellie used her own powers to unfreeze it. 

"Yeah! Team work!" Ellie raised her palm at Kara and they high fived. "Now, we put the taste on it."

They did the rest of the job together, adding the sea salt and all the other seasonings before taking care of the potatoes with butter, onions and garlic. Kara did all the tasks that Ellie attributed to her, but she mostly just observed amazed while her daughter's small hands did such complex movements with extreme dexterity. Then, they gave it another round of laser vision, this time both of them doing it at the same time. At the end, they had a messed up kitchen with small portions of every ingredient around them on the floor and all over the counter, but an amazing smelled and very delicious looking duck on the dining table.

"Good work, Kara." Ellie looked up at her mother with a smile on her face. Kara was staring proudly at the final product that was in front of them, "It wasn't that hard."

"Yeah. It really wasn't. Not with your help."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter is going to take a while longer than usual, because i'm having a hard time writing it and i wont be home until sunday, but, if you're curious about a certain breakup, it will be worth the wait


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, the skies are red and a choice is made

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE READ 
> 
> -The tone of this chapter is different from the other ones on this fic so far, specially the first part, there is direct mention to violence, characters deaths, but i tried my best to not make it descriptive

METROPOLIS- EIGHT YEARS AGO

It was supposed to be just a quick trip to Metropolis.

All she needed were some files that she left on her desk's drawer, the one on the top left, she remembered exactly where they were, so it would make things even quicker. The pilot was waiting for her inside the helicopter on the top of the building, so they wouldn't loose any time, Lena couldn't afford to waste even a second on that day, the amount of meetings and paperwork she had to deal with was bigger than ever before. 

The door was unlocked but the lights were off, so she entered and walked directly towards the light switch, the only sound apart from the city noises outside were her heels against the cold floor. Her old office apparently looked exactly as it was when she left it, the same furniture, same artificial plants. On the very same moment that her fingers touched the switch, she felt a hard hit against the back of her head, making her unconscious immediately. 

When her eyes opened again, she felt her wrists tied to the chair's arms, heavy hands holding her shoulders. She was still too dizzy to even think about trying to identify whomever was holding her, also dizzy enough to take a few moments to understand the chaos that were before her eyes, happening through the office windows. 

The skies were red. The skies were really red.

"Oh! Good morning!" She didn't recognize the voice at first, it kept echoing behind her as if it was far way, her eyes were struggling to focus on a single point, spinning as she felt like she was going to pass out again. The hands let go of her shoulders and then Lex finally showed himself, standing between Lena and the windows, taking a bow as if he had just finished presenting a show. 

"Lex? What are you doing?" Lena stared at her brother, who smiled cynically. 

"Well, you didn't stick around when I told you my plan to exterminate the enemy, but I still thought it would be nice for you to witness it in action, because we're the only ones who actually care about each other's accomplishments, right, sis?"

It was two years ago when Lex revealed her what he had been so committed at working on: A way of killing Superman. He expected his sister to help, but she obviously didn't even consider the possibility of doing that, of helping him kill an innocent man that had done nothing but good to the world. That was when he suddenly thought that LuthorCorp needed to have a building at National City and sent Lena away to take care of it, while shutting her out from his life completely.

"What did you do?"

"Sorry I had to start without you, but I'll let you catch up." He turned Lena's chair to the right, so she could look at the TV's that were hanging on the wall, right behind her old desk. Each one of them was on a different news channel, all of them displaying a disaster, explosions, deaths. Lena gasped at the sight of that, specially due to the element that all those screens had in common: Lex's name. 

Lex was the one who caused all of that. Her brother had finally lost his mind.

And, from where she was sitting, she could hear the screams that came from the outside. 

"You look impressed. As you should. But I'm not finished yet." He turned her chair back towards the windows again, "What do you think of the weather today?"

"Lex-"

"Did you know that the red sun has an effect on kryptonians? That it makes them as human as us?"

"You turned the sun red just so you could kill Superman?" She couldn't believe that, even if it was right in front of her. 

"At first, yes." He started, his hands still holding the chair tight, "But then I found out something thousands of times more effective than any kryptonite cannon I could ever build. Do you recognize this man?" He showed her a picture. Her heart skipped a beat. She felt like she couldn't breathe.

It was Clark. Kara's cousin. Lex knew who he was. But how? 

Lena still remembered how it had been, when Kara told her where she came from. They were in Midvale for Thanksgiving, so Kara suggested they had a picnic at the forest, close to the waterfalls, they would never find a place like that in National City, so they had to take the opportunity. They mostly took leftovers from the dinner with them, but they also had to prepare a few sandwiches because food for Kara was never enough. When they arrived at their destination, they sat together in front of the waterfalls, its beauty before them still didn't compare to how beautiful Kara was in Lena's eyes. Lena then joked about how come Kara was able to eat that amount of food and she answered with "I'm an alien." while she ate a slice of pie, making Lena laugh aloud, at least until she looked back at Kara, who just stared at her with apprehensive eyes, then she finally realized that Kara was serious. She told her everything, from the destruction of her home to spending 24 years trapped in a timeless space. Superman's identity ended up being a part of the story, but she knew that she could trust Lena, even though she was afraid that being an alien could be a deal breaker for her. But all Lena did was hug Kara tight, as if she could somehow take some part of the pain of loosing everything from Kara's chest, but she couldn't, so she just held her. 

"What does this picture make you think?" He continued, but Lena kept quiet, her hear beating against her chest in such painful way she wished she could just rip it off, "I'll tell you what it makes me think. Average american citizen, coming from a mediocre family, somehow was able to seek higher education. You would never look at such unimpressive human being with no notable characteristics and think that this man is a god. Yet, he is. He flies around on a cape and has the world on his hands. The man of tomorrow, that's not even a man. Do you want to know what is better than killing Superman?"

"Lex, you don't have to do this. Please..." Lena croaked, her face wet with tears of fear. She doubt Lex would do anything to actually harm her, but she felt like somehow she could have stopped him. She should have tried harder. She should never have turned her back on him when he showed her how invested he was on killing the man of steel. She should've at least tried to do something.

At the same time, she also knew that there was nothing she could have done. Lex would never change his mind. 

And now, many lives were lost, more lives were at risk. If he knew about Clark, did he know about Kara? She didn't use her powers, but if he knew about the existence of another Kryptonian...

"Better than killing Superman, is making him wanting to kill himself and not being able to. Making him feel worthless. Making his life all about the guilt of not being able to have done anything other than watch." Lex pointed towards an specific point on the horizon. Lena struggled a little bit to see what he was indicating, but then it became clear. It was the Daily Planet, "I bet that place is full of nasty reporters right now. The end of the world happening and all they're worried about is writing it down. There's an specific reporter I particularly don't like and, according to the spy software I installed on their entrance system, she used her card, so she is inside right now. I think her name is... Lois Lane? She wrote things rather shady about me. But that's no reason to blow her up, of course not."

"No. No, don't do this you can't possibly be thinking about-"

"SHUT UP." He screamed, holding the chair tighter. Lena pressed her eyes shut, trembling at his voice, "Clark Kent. That is, my dearest sister, enough reason to blow her up." Lex looked at the watch on his wrist and pressed a button. That action was followed by a huge explosion right in the middle of the Daily Planet's building, causing it's top to fall over on the rest. Lena's eyes were widened, tears kept falling down from it. She tried to look away from it, but she couldn't move.

"Don't worry." Lex told her with a smile, "I made sure he was not inside."

He walked closer to the window, to get a better look at everything he caused. His eyes were full of pride as he nodded, perfectly content with his surroundings. He kept his admiration time for a few seconds, before walking back to Lena, showing her once again Clark's picture. 

"I'll ask again. What does this picture make you think? Does it remind you of someone? Because it rang a bell for me." He then showed another picture and that was when Lena snapped. She impulsed her body forward, trying to fight against him somehow, but she stood no chance. She didn't have half his strength, plus her hands and legs were tied. He just held her back in an effortless movement, then started laughing.

It was Kara. He showed her a photo of Kara.

"I'm so disappointed in you, Lena. I can't believe you fell for one of them. It makes me sick."

"You are not going to touch her." Lena hissed.

"I wouldn't bother." He started walking around the office. Lena tried to turn towards him, but it was worthless. She heard a button being pressed, then the skies started to gradually clear out, the natural blue growing over the red that it once was, "The thing about Kryptonians is that you have to go for the heart."

He stood in front of her again, this time holding a 9 millimeters.

But, before he could think about pulling the trigger, a red blast ran through the glass window, breaking it in a million pieces and then traveled trough Lex's body, not hitting Lena by only a few inches. She felt the laser's temperature close to the skin of her chest, it almost touched her, it almost killed her.

Her brother fell forward on the floor. Her eyes looked up, towards the figure in red and blue outside. His eyes were still red, and she had never seen so much hatred and anger on a person's face before. 

FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE - ONE WEEK LATER

"You can't keep this up, Kal. You just can't." Kara begged as her worried blue eyes stared at her cousin, who has sat on the floor, his head pending down, his hands covered in someone else's blood. She knew he was listening, even though it didn't seem like it was there. His body was only a vessel of the man he used to be. Since everything happened, he had never put on Clark Kent's glasses or clothes again. For him, he had died together with all his friends and his wife on the bomb explosion.

And all that was left was a vengeful Superman. That already had his vengeance on the responsible for the disaster, but still looked for more.

"After the Red Sun, Superman's Reign of Terror" was displayed in every newspaper, every magazine, every blog, every website, every channel. It was impossible to run from it, as much as Kara wanted to avoid it. The article featured most facts about the events of the Red Sun day, followed by the week where Superman stopped every single crime the same way: Beating criminals to almost their deaths. 

Almost. So she still had hope on him. Even though he already had one life on his hands, she had to stop him from having more. 

And she couldn't let Kal destroy everything Superman stood for. She knew how much being a hero was important to him. He only needed time. That's why she went after him on the only place she thought he could be hiding. The Fortress. She had been there only once, when she got a little bit older and Kal thought it was time for her to see the little pieces of home they had on earth. But, different from him, she knew what home actually looked like, and the Fortress looked nothing like it. 

"What am I supposed to do, Kara?" He whispered weakly, "They're all the same to me now. From the murderer to the smuggler. They're all bad roots that need to be cut off."

"You don't really believe that, Kal. I know who you are, and you are a man who believes in justice, in compassion. In redemption. All you need is... Time to clear your head. Time to heal."

"I sometimes think about what possibly went through her head. When she died, I mean." He mumbled, as if he was lost in his own world and didn't hear a word Kara said to him, "She knew I wouldn't be able to save her. But did she forget that for a second? Did she expect me to shield her from the fire? From the concrete?"

"Kal..." Kara gulped and touched his shoulders, trying to bring him back to reality, "Go home. Stay with your mother. Help her take care of the farm, you always said this helped you calm down more than anything else. Just... hang the cape. At least for a while. At least until Superman starts to make sense again."

"I can't just disappear. People count on me. People need me." He told her. Even at his lowest point, that was what he was worried about. That was why Kara knew he could still be saved, "Have you gone outside? Have you seen the chaos out there?"

"I could... I can..." Kara breathed out, trying to clear her thoughts and be sure of what she was about to say before she said it, "I can do it. I can be Superman for you. I can keep things under control for all the time you need."

She knew she could do it. She had the powers, so the rest she could learn with the time, just like her cousin did. He wasn't born a hero, he became one, built on his will to protect people and to make the world a better place. She could see herself sending bad guys to jail, fighting evil aliens, finally giving something back to earth after all those years of shelter. 

It was also her chance of setting her heart at peace. She never told anyone, but she had to carry the weight of failing on her mission for her whole life. She was supposed to take care of Kal, make sure he was safe, and she wasn't there for him when he arrived. Anything could've happened to him, yet he got lucky. She never had the chance to make up for not being there. At least until now. 

"You can't."

"Why not? We have the same powers-"

"It's not about that, Kara" He finally looked up at her, there were dark circles under his eyes, "I know you're as capable as I am. But, if you do this, Kara Danvers will be compromised. Forever. You'll put everyone you love at risk. You've seen what happened to Lois. Do you want the same thing to happen to Lena?"

"I-"

"I know you remember that she almost died that day too, right? Because Lex found out who you were. A kryptonian. Not a hero. A kryptonian. That was all it took." He insisted and Kara pressed her lips, her stomach turning just at the mentioning of what Lena had been through, "Just imagine how things will be when you put on the cape and the symbol and fly around the city. You'll make enemies, Kara. A lot of them. I kept thinking the target was always on my own back, but it wasn't. It was on Lois'. And it will be on Lena's if you actually do this."

Lex tied her to a chair and forced her to watch he accomplish his plans. He was about to kill her when Kal killed him himself.

She could never risk Lena's life like that again. 

So she had a choice to make. 

NATIONAL CITY - LATER THAT SAME NIGHT 

Kara's hands were on the doorknob, but she just couldn't turn it. 

She closed her eyes and pressed her lips, her free hand holding tight onto her cousin's cape, feeling it resistant texture against the tip of her fingers. She had the strength to lift a truck, yet she was struggling to gather the necessary strength to open that door. But she had to. She just had to.

When she finally did it, her eyes went directly towards Lena on the couch, she seemed to be finally sleeping peacefully, after so many days of barely sleeping at all. She had seen the world falling around her and witnessed the death of her brother right before her eyes. 

And Kara was about to break her all over again, even though she didn't actually have the time to gather the broken pieces of herself. 

She was a light sleeper, so, as soon as the front door shut, her eyes opened. She sat on the couch fast, putting her head against her forehead, probably a little dizzy for getting up so quickly then she looked at Kara with expectancy. Kara had told her she would go after her cousin, try to convince him to step down from being Superman for a while.

She just had no idea of what it would cost.

"Kara, are you okay? How did it go?"

Kara pressed her lips, pulling a good amount of air inside her lungs. Her back was still touching the door, as if she was afraid to get any closer to Lena, whose expectant eyes turned confused as she watched Kara just stare at her silently.

"Kara?" Lena got up from the couch, walking towards her girlfriend, but Kara raised the hand in which she held the red cape between the two of them, shaking her head negatively, begging for Lena to stay where she was, "Why do you... Have his cape? Did something happen to him?"

"He's fine. He will be." Kara's eyes were fixated on the floor bellow her. Lena could see that clearly something was wrong, so she decided to stand still, respecting Kara's space. 

"Did he listen to you?"

"Yes. He'll lay low. He'll focus on himself a little."

"That's good news." Lena gave her a genuine smile, even though Kara knew she wasn't okay. She made sure that Lena was sleeping when she left, otherwise she wouldn't have the heart to leave her alone. She had been so... Off. As if her mind was somewhere else all the time. Whatever it was, it wasn't in a good place, and Kara knew that, "It's actually great news. Then why do you look so disturbed?"

"But the only way... The only way I could convince him was promising that I would take care of things while he's gone."

"Wait. What?" Lena was confused, her eyebrows furrowed, "You're going to..." She gesticulated between the cape and Kara.

"Yeah. I have to. I mean, I could've done it sooner, you know that. I guess it took a disaster for me to finally step up and help my cousin."

"Come on, Kara, don't say that. Don't be so hard on yourself. It's not a crime to want a normal life."

"But I could've-"

"You couldn't have predicted what was going to happen. At least not you." Lena bit her underlip. She felt guilty, of course, even though deep down she knew she would never have been able to stop Lex. She warned Kara about her brother's plans as soon as she knew about Superman, she told her her refusal to help him develop whatever he plotted against Superman was the reason why Lex shut her out and sent her away. Kara, of course, told Clark, who said we would be alert. And... Well, that wasn't enough. 

"Lena, it was not your f-"

"Kara, no, its fine." Lena gave her a reassuring smile before Kara could even attempt to convince her she had no responsibility for her brothers acts, "This is not about me. It's about you. Are you sure about doing this? Putting yourself out there? And... Fighting?" 

"Y-Yes. I'm sure." Kara nodded. She somehow expected Lena to be opposed to the idea of her becoming a superhero, but she saw nothing other than worry on green eyes.

Not that it actually mattered anymore. 

"Right. Then you're going to need a suit. I know It has been a while since I did anything else than being a CEO, but I could go back to the lab and design something for you to wear." Lena's accent was showing as she spoke excitedly, and Kara's heart was aching at every single beat, "Maybe something Kryptonite proof if I could get a sample to study how it works-" 

"Lena..." 

"I want to help you. Of course I would rather you never risked your life but I know how much helping people its important to you, so I support you. You don't have to this alone and... Kara?" She stopped herself when Kara covered her face with her hands and started sobbing. Of course, of course Lena had to be supportive towards her decision, to offer to help, to remind Kara of how much of an amazing person she was and make what she had to do next even more difficult than it already was. 

"You have to leave." Kara just let out, her face still hidden in her hands so she didn't see Lena's eyes full of confusion as she stared at her.

"What?"

"If you're with me and someone finds out who I am you're going to be their main target. And what if I can't save you, like Kal couldn't save Lois?"

"Kara... Listen, what happened... I can't even begin to... Just because it happened to Lois doesn't mean it will happen to me."

"I can't risk it."

"I know its scary, but I'm... Human. I could die to anything, like a heart attack or an illness, you can't possibly shield me from it all, darling. And its not your responsibility to do so."

Kara knew that. She tried not to think much about it, but she knew that Lena was fragile and that she could lose her at any moment. But losing her to an illness would never be the same thing of getting her killed. It wouldn't be her fault. 

"These things are not the same as being kidnapped, or tortured, or blown up inside a building." Lena's eyes slightly widened at that, as if she never expected to hear something that cold and direct coming from Kara's mouth, "I... I don't know what I would be capable of, if something ever happened to you because of me-"

"There's a risk" Lena's voice was calm as she tried to calm Kara as well, "But I'm willing to take it."

"I'm not."

"You're not making any sense. I thought..." Lena's voice started to get croaked, "I thought we were okay. What happened? Why do you want to leave me so badly? What did I do?"

"I love you, Lena. I love you so much that it hurts me." They were both crying now, at a few steps distance from one another, "But this is bigger than us. I have to do this and I would never put you at risk because of my choices."

"I don't care about the damn risks, Kara!" Lena shouted, "You are a good person. You're brave. You're selfless. But you don't need to put in that amount of self sacrifice to help your cousin and-" 

"You always say that. That I'm selfless, that I do everything for others rather than for myself. So, just this once..." Kara took a deep breath, "Do this for me."

It was all that it took. 

Lena pressed her lips, nodding defeated as she stared at Kara, silently, her eyes as full of pain as they were of tears that rolled down her red cheeks. She walked towards the front door, stopping by Kara's side. She touched her right cheek, which made Kara's chest feel even tighter than it already was. She couldn't resist to Lena being so close to her, so she pulled her even closer by her waist, and kissed her, Slowly, painfully, feeling her warmth against her body for one last time. 

"I can't see you ever again." Lena whispered when the kiss was torn apart. Her face was still close to Kara's, "Because If I do...."

"Me too." Kara whispered back. She knew what Lena was going to say and she knew that for her, it would be the same thing. She could never have Lena around and not wanting to kiss her, to hold her. They stayed on each other's arms for a few more seconds, Lena hiding her face on Kara's shoulders, then Kara had to force herself to push Lena away. 

"Stay safe. Okay?" She asked Kara, her hand trembling as she held the door knob. Kara nodded, and watched as the woman she loved closed the door behind her. 

But she didn't leave. 

Kara heard as she just fell on the floor and sobbed, probably holding her knees against her chest, right in front of the door. The only time Kara witnessed Lena as broken as that, was the day that everything happened. She woke up and noticed that Lena wasn't by her side anymore, but, from the bed, she could hear her crying even though she tried really hard not to make any noise, holding her hand against her mouth. Kara went closer and held Lena tight, letting her cry as much as she needed on her arms. But, on the inside, Kara was so angry at Lex, for everything he had done. She never thought she could hate a person so much as she hated him. She probably never felt hate, until that man came into her life and caused that much damage.

But, on that night, Kara was the one to blame for Lena's pain.

And she couldn't stand it.

So she ran towards the open window and flew, as far as she could go. 

But she couldn't really run away from herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there will be another flashback chapter later on, following from where this one stopped, and it will be fully from Lena's perspective,  
> i hope this one cleared things a little bit


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, kara loses her temper

NATIONAL CITY- PRESENT DAY

"I lost again?" Ellie looked down at the Uno cards on her hands with disappointed and slightly confused eyes. 

"Yeah, I'm sorry." Kara offered her a small smile. It had been the fourth time they were playing, Ellie asked if they could practice before everyone came over for game night and, even though it would go against the teaching thing she was trying to do, Kara was thinking over the possibility of letting Ellie win the next one, just so she could feel a little more confident. 

"I'll never get good until game night time." Ellie sighed. 

"It's okay, you just need to learn how to use the special cards." Kara took a few cards from the mount to give a visual example, "You had a plus four, so you should have played it when I had one card left, that way you could buy yourself more time to win." 

"Oh I get it now." Ellie nodded, apparently less upset and a little more motivated to keep trying , "Again?"

"Alright." Kara laughed slightly at her persistence, "Don't worry, Lena didn't know how to play any games then she turned out better than us at Monopoly."

"She won a lot?" Ellie asked while she watched Kara shuffle the cards so they could start a new game.

"Yeah, she won for both of us. She was always with me" Kara told her with a smile as she remembered the great time she used to have with Lena at game night. The first time she attended it, the confusion didn't leave her face during the whole thing, she got even a little bit startled when people yelled at each other, and they had to assure her they weren't actually fighting. Kara thought she hated it, but she was actually looking forward for the next time and, as games night went, not only she understood how most games went she even made people hesitate to touch the Monopoly box again, it was almost impossible to win when she was playing too. 

It wasn't as hard talking about Lena with Ellie as it was with everyone else. Ellie didn't roll her eyes or judged Kara internally. She actually appreciated every word she could hear about her mother. 

"Why didn't she know how to play board games?" Ellie questioned as they observed the cards on their hands. 

"Well, from what she told me, she didn't have much time to do fun things when she was a kid. Her mother was very strict and wanted Lena to have a perfect record at school, she also had tutors at home, and was involved with projects with her brother-"

"Mom has a brother?" 

Oh shit, Kara thought instantly.

"Um... Yeah... But he passed away." She carefully answered.

"Were they best friends like you and Aunt Alex?"

"I don't think so. But I'm not the one who should be talking to you about him. You should ask Lena." Kara explained and Ellie sighed, already accepting that these were all the answers she would get on the matter. She actually knew how much Lena used to love her brother and how much his approval on everything she worked on meant to her. And she knew how much Lena felt guilty for being sad over Lex's death, as if she wasn't allowed to love him, because of everything he did. Kara wondered if he ever loved her back. Was he even capable of love? Or he was just pretending all along?

"My mom never tells me anything." Ellie complained, "She always say that she'll tell me when I'm old enough to understand, but I already understand a lot of things, so it's not fair."

"You just have to be patient, little girl."

"But I guess that her mom not letting her play much explains why my mom is so worried about me playing. She says she's happy I like to know about food but she says it's important I do kid stuff too, so sometimes we play together, we play dolls and create stories for them, or we dress up in costumes and play pretend! And there was this one time that her meeting was cancelled so we had the whole day and we built a huge race track all around the house and we raced with my remote controlled cars for hours. It was so awesome." Ellie giggled as she remembered and Kara laughed a little too. It was kind of hard for her to picture Lena just... Playing with a child like that. And apparently, she didn't just sit and played, she actually got into everything they did together. 

Then, the sadness finally hit her when she thought that she could have been there, doing all those things with them. 

"It sounds amazing." Kara smiled, trying to push away the negative thoughts. She would be there from now on. It was all that mattered.

"Did they have board games at Krypton? Or did you learn when you got here?"

"We only had holographic games, but they were all just educative. About science, or puzzles, or quizzes. They were never just for fun but I never realized because I didn't know anything different." Kara told her, "Game night actually started with the Danvers, so Alex and I decided to carry on when we moved out."

"Uno!" Ellie yelled and startled Kara a little bit, "Sorry, I just got excited."

"That's alright." Kara looked at her cards, she still had three and none of them could stop Ellie from winning, maybe if she played her blue 3 could make things harder since she would be changing colors, but she decided to just let the little girl be happy for once and played the red 6. Ellie then dropped her own card, it was a wild card.

"I won!" Ellie started jumping excitedly, the neighbors wouldn't be happy with that, but she was just so thrilled that Kara didn't have the heart to stop her. 

"You kept your wild card for the end?!" Kara asked with her blue eyes widened at Ellie's sense of strategy.

"Yeah, because then I would win with whatever color."

"Good girl." Kara nodded, proud of Ellie for learning so quickly. The doorbell sounded through the living room and Ellie finally stopped jumping. It would be her first time meeting Brainy and J'onn, so she was a little bit nervous. Kara didn't label her as a shy kid, but meeting new people seemed always a little bit harder for Ellie. As soon as introductions were made, it was like she felt safer to go on, "I'll get the door. Can you put the snacks on the table?"

"Okay." Ellie nodded, using her powers to go back and fourth from the kitchen to the living room in a inhumanly fast pace while she carried the bows with different kinds of chips, popcorn, and, of course, the burritos she had promised Nia earlier that week. Kara opened the door and everyone outside greeted her excitedly with hugs and "hey!", she found it weird that everyone arrived at once, but decided not to comment anything.

"Where's J'onn?" She asked when she noticed he wasn't among her friends.

"He'll come over later, he had to stay at the DEO for a while longer." Alex explained.

"If you guys need my help-"

"Relax. It's nothing too serious. Just an issue with a prisoner." Alex's tone didn't sound convincing enough for Kara. She was happy to have time to spend with Ellie, but she was worried about National City's well-being without Supergirl around. If something happened, she wanted to help, she told Alex that, "If we need you, we'll tell you, I promise." 

"Right..." Kara decided to just accept that for the moment as she closed the front door, then she looked around the apartment, trying to find her daughter, which didn't take too long.

Ellie was at the living room standing next to the table, that was now filled with all the food they gathered for game night. Alex and Sam waved hello to the girl before going into the kitchen, putting all of the beer bottles inside the fridge. Ruby joined them there shortly after, taking with her the soda cans that Nia and Brainy had on their hands. They would usually have someone bringing something stronger, but, since they would be having two kids around, they decided to take it easy. 

"Ellie, this is Brainy." Kara introduced them while they walked towards the living room. Ellie offered him her hand followed by a wide smile. Brainy awkwardly took it while his face was straight up studying the small human/alien in front of him, but his strange expression didn't seem to bother the girl. 

"And I guess you remember Nia." Kara continued with the introductions.

"Yeah. I made your burritos!" She announced and Nia laughed. 

"Oh, so that means we'll finally taste your cooking." Alex went to the living room with an open beer bottle on her hands, "Which reminds me, I brought you a gift."

"A gift?" Ellie's blue eyes sparkled with curiosity. Kara was also curious as she watched Alex taking a small wrapped package from inside her wife's purse. Ellie unwrapped the paper covered in rainbow colored hearts with caution, as if she was afraid of damaging what was inside, even if it was clear it was some kind of clothing. Her eyes widened when she identified what it was. 

A white chef's hat with her name on it. 

She rushed towards Alex, hugging her waist with maybe more strength than what she should with a human, but all Alex did was hug her back.

"I guess you like it?"

"Yes, a lot, thank you." Ellie confirmed, and Kara felt her heart warming, "I'm never cooking without this, never, ever."

"Put it on! Let's see how it looks on you." Sam asked Ellie, who immediately did it. The hat was almost a perfect fit, just a few inches bigger than it should, which was no problem since she would probably grow up a lot in the following months.

"Oh, god. She is the cutest thing." Nia commented. 

"Yeah." Alex and Kara said simultaneously and Ellie's cheeks turned red, all the eyes in the room were looking at her with extreme affection. 

"Thank you, Alex. This was very thoughtful." Kara turned at her sister.

"I'm sure Lena will give her the whole restaurant so I want to contribute with something." Alex whispered, pure sarcasm in her tone, and Kara just rolled her eyes, annoyed. 

"What are we playing tonight?" Nia asked excitedly, browsing the game boxes that were by the couch's side.

"I only had the time to teach Ellie how to play UNO, so how about we start with that?" Kara suggested and everyone nodded, taking their seats around the coffee table while Alex opened up some space in the middle of all that food for the cards to be played, "Then we can play something different later and teach her as we go."

"Sound's good." Sam's answer seemed to be the same as everyone else's.

"I hope she taught you well because I am the UNO boss in this house." Alex joked and Ellie laughed at her, her eyes defiantly staring at her aunt as she sat next to her wife.

"I won the last game we played!" Ellie claimed, "Right, Kara?"

"Not only she did, but she also made it impossible for me to win. I may have created a monster." Kara told them, and Ellie laughed again, "Are you all ready to start?"

"Yes. I have been practicing not counting the cards. I'm getting good at it." Brainy informed them, sounding proud of himself for the progress. Everyone praised him for his efforts in not unintentionally cheating on the games anymore. 

"I'm sorry but I'm going straight to the food, I'm starving, I didn't even have time to stop and eat today, Cat is insane lately." Nia took a burrito from the tray. Ellie watched her eat, her eyes full of expectancy. Kara helped her prepare those, mostly she just cut the ingredients and Ellie was the one who mixed them together, the actual hard part of the job. She tasted one after they were finished and, once again, she was surprised by how good it was. 

Nia's eyes widened after the first bite.

"You don't like it?" Ellie asked, worried.

"I... I can't even... This is so good. I can't believe you made this. And by yourself? How is that even possible? I'll never be able to cook like that in my life." Nia was in awe and everyone laughed at her reaction.

"Kara helped a little."

"All the credits goes to Chef Ellie. I just cut the stuff." Kara shrugged. Alex let the curiosity get the best of her and decided to eat one too. 

"Wow. You're the best addition to this family, Ellie. No one else is allowed to cook but her, Understood?" She was nodding while she ate. 

"Hey, I thought you liked my food." Sam questioned and Alex pressed her lips, "You lied?!"

"I had to get the girl somehow." Alex joked and Sam slapped her arm without actually putting any strength to it, "I'm just kidding babe, your food is amazing."

"Sure..." Sam's eyes were playfully suspicious. Ellie's cheeks turned red again at the amount of compliments and she tried to hide her face behind the cards on her hands.

"I won't even need to count the cards to win this time." Brainy was smiling at his cards, probably holding a lucky hand.

"I don't understand, what is counting the cards?" Ellie asked.

"It is a way of predicting other people's cards and the cards on the mount based on the number of each card kind present on th-"

"Brainy." Nia stopped him, and he understood he wasn't helping, "Let's just say it's a way of cheating."

"Cheating is wrong." Ellie told him and he just sighed.

"I never cheated on purpose, alright? I'm all about sportsmanship." He defended himself. 

"Brainy's brain functions different than ours. He thinks faster and deeper about everything." Kara explained to Ellie. 

"What do you mean? It's like a superpower?"

"Something like that." Brainy smiled at her and he seemed about to add something else to his sentence, but stopped himself when Alex's phone started ringing. The attention was on her while she took the phone out of her pocket. When Kara saw J'onn's name on the screen, she stared at Alex with a single raised brow. Alex said she shouldn't worry, but what if J'onn needed Kara's help and she didn't want to tell her? It sounded like something Alex would do, she was always trying to have Kara take it easy and now she wanted that more than ever. 

"J'onn, hey. All good? Are you coming?"

"Actually, no. I couldn't hold him off, he escaped." Kara wasn't even sorry for listening through, "He's a wrecking machine, TV is probably broadcasting him right now as he destroys everything on his path."

Kara reached for the controller fast and turned on the TV, switching channels until she found the news one. A huge alien that reminded her of a white martian, except this one was bigger and had a slightly darker skin with way more spikes, was jumping from building to building, running away from police helicopters. Kara didn't know where he was headed, but she had to stop him. 

Alex just exchanged looks with Kara, and she knew it was time for her to suit up and leave. 

"I'll be right back." She told them before walking towards the window.

"Kara, wait! Where are you going?" Ellie called her back, her eyes full of fear. Kara gave her a small smile.

"It's okay, I'll just deal with this bad guy then we can keep playing." She assured Ellie, who hesitantly nodded as she watched her mother walk away and fly through the window. 

She suited up in the way, It didn't take much flying for her to find the big guy she was after. She sighed when she noticed all the destruction he had caused and dived in his direction, punching him hard in the face, hard enough for him to fall from the building he was holding onto and hit his body against the floor, the impact cracking the road bellow it.

"Hey, big guy! Where are you headed?" She had both of her hands on her waist. The alien got up, his red eyes full of anger as he ran towards Supergirl like a juggernaut. Lucky for her, she was fast, so she flew out of his way with no problem. Unlucky for her, she underestimated him, because as soon as she took off, he jumped upwards and grabbed her leg, hitting her against the floor even harder then what she did to him. 

Before she could react, he punched her in the face, over and over again. Each one of his hands were the size of Kara's head and, even though she was super strong and all, she had a little bit of a disadvantage there. She was able to slow him down using freeze breath on his face, but it wasn't as effective as Kara had hoped it would be, since he still had the strength to lift her up in the air and throw her against the nearest wall. She fell on her knees and when he was about to hit her again, a laser hit his legs. Both Kara and the alien looked in the direction of where it came from, an dark alley on their right and, when Kara noticed the small silhouette standing in the shadows, her heart stopped. 

It was Ellie. 

Kara tried to be cool. To think clearly about her next move. So she took advantage of the distraction Ellie caused to punch the alien in the face, and then pull his arm to swing him and throw him as far as she could. He had to have a weakness, but Kara didn't know it yet and she didn't have time to find out. She had to take Ellie as far from there as possible. What if the alien decided to go after her? What if someone saw her? 

So she did something she had never done before.

She ran away from the fight.

She flew in the direction of the alley as fast as a lightning bolt and grabbed Ellie in her arms, just letting go of her on another alley, a few blocks away.

"What are you doing?!" Kara yelled at her, feeling her throat burn, "What were you thinking?! Someone could've seen you! You could have gotten hurt! Or worse!"

"But I didn't" 

"But you could've!"

"I was only trying to help..." Ellie told her with teary widened eyes, scared at Kara's angry reaction towards her. 

"I don't need your help!" She regretted as soon as she said it. The tears fell down on Ellie's face and the look she had on her eyes reminded her of the last time she saw Lena. All she could see was hurt, "No, that sounded wrong. I'm sorry. Wait, don't fly away!"

She tried to grab Ellie's arm before she took off but, surprisingly, the little girl was faster than her. Kara didn't even think about going after that alien again, even though he would probably end up causing more havoc. If he was just trying to flee, maybe the city wasn't in as much danger as it seemed, so she just took off and tried to follow Ellie as closely as she could.

Luckily, the girl was heading back home and ended up entering her apartment through the window. When Kara landed on the living room, she had already ran inside and closed Kara's bedroom dor behind her.

"Kara, I'm so so sorry. We tried to hold her back but-"

"It's fine. There's no way you could've done it anyways." Kara waved off her sister's apologies, "Where's that alien now?"

"I'm heading back to the DEO to try to track him down."

"I'm sorry I let him ran away. I just... I couldn't let Ellie-"

"No, don't even apologize for putting your daughter first, ever. We'll find him, don't worry about it." Alex shook her head. Everyone else on the living room just looked at them, unsure of what to do, "What happened? Why did she come back like this?"

"I yelled at her I... I said something... I feel terrible. I was so scared something could've happened to her... I'm the worst mother in the world. Maybe I shouldn't even..."

"Kara, calm down." Sam stepped up, holding Kara's shoulders while she sobbed, "It's okay, we all lose control sometimes, and say things we regret to our children. But we can always apologize and try to do better." 

Kara looked at her with teary blue eyes and tried really hard to believe in what she was saying. Maybe Ellie would forgive her. 

"Just give it some time." Alex advised, "For both of you to calm down. Okay?"

"Right." Kara tried to control her breathing. 

"I have to go, but I'll call you later to see how things are going." Alex gave her sister a tight hug, "Brainy, you coming?"

"Absolutely." He got up from the couch. Kara then noticed Nia wasn't there anymore, so she assumed Nia had left as Dreamer to try to help with the alien situation.

Alex and Brainy left the apartment, followed by Ruby and Sam, who offered to stay but Kara told them it was better if she dealt with the situation by herself. So, after everyone had gone, she walked towards her bedroom, still wearing her Supergirl suit, and slid the door open. Ellie was hiding under the sheets, curled in a pillow and crying quietly. Kara's heart broke at the sight of that and her shoulders felt heavy with guilt.

"I don't want to talk to you." Ellie sobbed when she realized Kara was there. 

"Alright. But I'll wait here until you do." Kara sat on the floor, resting her back on the walls while she looked at Ellie.

"I don't want to. Never ever." 

"Come on, little girl. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that, but I was just scared something could've happened to you. I know you only wanted to help, and I'm sorry."

"I don't care."

"What can I do to make it better?"

"Nothing. I hate you and I want my mom!" Ellie then started crying even harder and Kara pressed her lips, closing her eyes as she absorbed that she made her daughter hate her within three days of having her around. She worked so hard to build a relationship with her, to create a bond, and she ruined it so easily. She already loved Ellie so much and couldn't imagine how she could go on if Ellie didn't want anything to do with her anymore. 

Within a few seconds of silence, Ellie slowly took off the sheets that hid her and looked at Kara.

"Sorry. I don't really hate you."

"Oh." It was all Kara could make herself say. Even after Ellie taking it back, it still hurt to have heard that, but the relief was slowly setting into Kara's chest.

"I didn't know you would be so angry. I thought I could help. Because I saw you fighting on the TV and you were losing and I was afraid you could get hurt."

"Thank you, for wanting to help me. But you have to understand that what I do is really dangerous. I needed to train really hard to learn how to fight, how to properly use my powers. You're just a kid, Ellie. You can't follow me into danger. At least not until you're older."

"When I'm older you'll let me help you?" Her blue eyes were full of hope.

"Of course." Kara confirmed, even though she wasn't sure if she could actually ever do that, but it made Ellie smile, so she decided to just leave it that way, "But for now, promise me you'll never do that again?"

"Okay. I promise." Ellie nodded. Kara got up from the floor and before she could take a step forward, Ellie flew towards her and hug her tightly. Kara hug her back, kissing her forehead and feeling so relieved everything was okay again, "I'm sorry I said I hate you."

"I'm sorry I yelled at you."

"And I'm sorry the bad guy got away because of me."

"We'll get him. Don't worry about that." Kara reassured her, hoping that they would actually get the alien before any more damage was done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> motherhood is hard
> 
> small tease for the next chapter, anyone wondering where Lena is?


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, ellie tells the truth and learns some truths as well

"So, everything alright between you two?" Sam asked when they were sat down at the round table close to the window. Kara thought it would be nice to take Ellie to know her favorite Ice cream parlor, where they had the most variety of flavors and also served the most delicious desserts, including Kara's well known favorite. She invited Sam, Ruby and Alex, but her sister was still at work and would be joining them later. The alien from the night before was nowhere to be seen but the DEO was still dedicated to finding him and putting him back into prison. 

"All good." Ellie nodded while she ate her vanilla flavored ice cream cone with visible joy on her face. Things went smoothly after they understood each other, but Kara was terrified of getting in another fight with her daughter, even though it would probably happen again someday. Sam and Ruby got along extremely well and they still had their disagreements, so it would be okay, "Kara said she's going to let me help when I'm older."

"Oh. Will she?" Sam's eyes were on Kara's, who quietly begged her to just play along. 

"Yes. Right, Kara?"

"Of course." Kara confirmed, her guilty blue eyes staring down at her own huge ice cream bowl, that had four different flavors and she was already waiting for her chocolate pecan pie to arrive. That was the only place where she could get one as good as the one Eliza made. 

Her eyes lifted when she heard her name, or Supergirl's name, being said on the TV hanging on the wall on their left. Their attention turned to the screen as well, and Kara was ready to see the media criticizing her for just letting an alien threat escape, but what she actually saw worried her twice as much. 

"It was sent to us earlier today low quality images of what appear to be another laser coming from this alley, could it be the return of Superman or another Kryptonian among us?" The reporter narrated as the images of the fight were being displayed on the screen. The filming was from a great distance, whomever was filming zoomed as much as they could so the quality was low. It captured the moment Ellie's laser hit the alien's legs, but It didn't really reveal much about where the laser came from. 

Still, Kara's heart started to race. 

"Fuck."

"It's okay, the camera doesn't even get her." Sam immediately tried to calm her down. The waitress arrived at their table with the two slices of the pie, putting one of them in front of Ellie, who was sitting across from Kara, by Ruby's side since they were playing a multiplayer game together on their phones, and the other one in front of Kara, who thanked her with a smile. Sam waited for the waitress to leave before continuing, "Also, they're considering it was your cousin."

"But they're also considering another Kryptonian." Kara's voice trembled with fear. She looked at Ellie, who didn't seem not even near as worried as she was, resuming the game she was playing with Ruby. 

At least until her phone started to ring. Instead of a name, a number appeared on the screen, so it wasn't Lena or, if it was, she was calling from a different number. Regardless, Ellie's face was pale and her eyes widened as she stared at her phone as if it could explode and hurt her. 

"Pick up, maybe it's your mother calling from another number." Sam told her, she thought the same as Kara did. But Ellie didn't move. 

When she didn't pick up, the phone started to ring again, the same number dialing.

"Ellie?" Kara called her daughter's attention. 

"Oh boy..."

"What's wrong?" Ruby asked, worried. 

"I think is time I tell you the truth." Ellie looked at Kara, who had her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"What are you talking about?"

"I’m not supposed to be here." She confessed, not making eye contact with anyone else on the table. The phone was still ringing, but no one seemed to care about it anymore, "I’m should be at a summer camp, but I cancelled it using my mom’s email and then I flew to your work so I could meet you."

Silence. 

"What? Wait. What?!" Kara was blinking nervously as she looked at her daughter, who reached for the slice of pie in front of her and ate a piece of it, as if everything was fine, "Ellie! Talk to me. Lena has no idea you're here?"

"She has now, she probably watched the TV." 

"Ellie!" Kara's tone went high and Sam touched her shoulder, a silent way of telling her to lower it. Kara didn't even know what to think. What she was feeling. And Lena. Oh Rao. Lena was probably freaking out. She was going to kill Kara for letting Ellie expose herself like that, after so many years of successfully keeping her safe. 

"I’m sorry! I just... I just..." Ellie tried to explain herself, but started coughing out of nothing. She tried to clear her throat, but couldn't. 

"How could you do something like that? You can never lie to your mother about where you are!" Kara wasn't yelling, it was more like desperately begging, "This could’ve gone so so so wrong... And-"

"Ellie, are you okay?" Sam asked when she noticed Ellie's face turning red and her mouth turning purple as she struggled to keep breathing. When Kara realized that, her eyes widened, "I think she’s having an allergic reaction."

And Kara's mind went back to the day that she met Ellie. After she handed her the note who turned her life upside down. She also offered Kara some cookies that she had baked and, when Kara asked how could they taste so good, she said: Some people like to make it crunchy so they add nuts, but I’m allergic so I just put more chocolate chips.

The pie was almost entirely made of nuts.

"Fuck." Kara immediately got up from the table and took Ellie on her arms. She didn't care about all of the eyes inside the ice cream parlor staring at her as she ran towards the streets through the back door with her daughter on her hands. The door leaded to an alley, so she just flew upwards to the sky without even caring about suiting up. She bolted through the air in the direction of the DEO, she couldn't take Ellie to any hospital since they wouldn't be able to get anything in her, at least not with ordinary needles. She landed on the balcony of the building and she was so lucky that Alex was still there. If she had gotten there a minute later, her sister would've already left.

"Help! Please!" She screamed, even though everyone had already noticed she was there. A stretcher was brought fast and Alex ran towards her sister, who was putting Ellie down when she reached them.

"What happened?" She asked while she looked down at Ellie, who had her scared eyes open as she struggled to breathe.

"She's allergic to nuts. And I forgot that. I forgot that, Alex." Kara's hand went nervously through her hair while she watched her sister putting the inhaler over Ellie's red face. 

"Alright. I got this." Alex assured her, making a signal with her head for the other agents to follow her as they took Ellie away to a proper room where they had the equipment that could help her. 

Kara sighed, walking around in circles while her heartbeat was out of control. It was the second time in 24 hours that her daughter's life was at risk because of her. How could she ever forgive herself? How could she have forgotten about such an important piece of information about her daughter?

She only stopped walking when her phone rang. 

It was Lena. 

She lost her balance for a moment after seeing her name on the screen. She thought she would never see it again, yet there it was. It took her a couple of seconds to pick up. When she did, neither of them said anything immediately. Kara could her the heavy noise on the background and, when she heard a flight announcement, she knew that Lena was in an airport, probably coming to national city right away. 

"Kara?" Lena finally spoke, and Kara's heart skipped a beat. She leaned her back on the nearest wall and tried to keep it together.

"Lena." She gasped.

"I... I don't even know what's possibly going through your head right now, but I'm heading over there, so we can talk. Alright?"

"Lena..." It was like she didn't know how to say anything else.

"It will probably take an hour. Are you at h- your apartment?"

"I'm- No, I'll text you the address. Its just that something happened and-"

"I have to run or I'll miss my flight, we'll talk as soon as I get there. I promise." It was all she said before she hung up the phone. 

The following hour felt like forever. She had no news of Ellie's state, Lena could be there at any minute, there was so much going on and her mind didn't know what to focus on. She was spiraling between the horrifying sight of Ellie struggling to breathe on her arms, the fear of something going wrong and Kara losing her after she had just got her, and Lena, the woman she loved like she wasn't able to love anyone else, who she pushed away for reasons she didn't even believe in anymore, who was about to be face to face with her again. 

"Kara?" Alex's voice made Kara slightly jump, suddenly being brought back to reality. 

"How is she? Is she okay? How is she feeling?"

"She's fine. Her throat is almost back to normal, I gave her something to sleep during the process. It's okay." Alex squeezed her sister's shoulders.

"Thank you, Alex. For saving her. I don't know what I would have done if.... I mean... It was my fault.... I should've payed more attention..."

"Kara, you brought her here within minutes. You saved her too." Alex tried to convince her, but Kara didn't feel any better. She was glad her daughter was safe though, "It happens."

"Yeah, I have been just great with her lately."

"Come on, Kara, you're too hard on yourself. It's not an easy job, being a mother, and you didn't have time to prepare for it. Even if you did, it would still be hard. You'll make more mistakes than these, and it's fine, because-"

"Ellie lied to us, Alex." Kara cut her off with the truth. 

"Lied? About what?"

"Lena doesn't even know she has been here. She canceled her enrollment at this summer camp and she flew all the way here, faked that note, probably even changed Lena's number on her phone so we wouldn't be able to contact her." At least Kara assumed that she did that last thing, since Lena didn't pick up when Alex called using Ellie's phone, when she called Ellie her name didn't appear on screen and minutes later when she called Kara she used the number she always had, the number that Kara never deleted from her contacts. 

"That little brat." Alex's eyes were widened with surprise, "Is it too soon to say I told you so about the note though?"

"Alex."

"Okay, too soon."

"She's coming. Lena, I mean. She called. She saw the news."

"She called?" Alex's tone got higher in surprise, "Wait, what news? Did someone actually spot Ellie? Oh my god...."

"No, not quite, they only saw the laser, but I guess it wasn't hard for Lena to figure out. She's going to kill me, Alex. For almost exposing Ellie to the world. For letting her almost die."

"Kara, it's going to be okay" Alex's eyes were on Kara's and she held her sister's shoulders, trying to keep her calm, "None of these things were your fault, and Lena has no right to be angry at you, because nothing you could possibly have done could be worse than what she did. Right? It's great she's coming, because you two will finally talk and settle how things will go for now on."

"Alex..."

"It will be fine, Kara. I should let Sam know everything went well, then we can stay with Ellie." Alex took her phone out of her pocket, but before she dialed her wife's number and quickly updated Sam about Ellie's situation, she used her comms to authorize Lena's entrance to the building. 

"How long until she wakes up?" Kara asked while she followed her sister to Ellie's location.

"Not much, just a few more minutes." Alex sighed, and Kara could feel how annoyed she was. Still, she was able to hold whatever was on her mind until they got to the same room where Kara usually went when she needed help from the sun lamps. Ellie's eyes were closed as her body rested on a bed that made her seem even smaller. The sun lamps around her were on, and Kara assumed Alex figured it would help her as well as it helped Kara heal faster, "This is insane. Look at all the trouble this girl had to go through just to meet her own mother. How can someone put their child through something like this-"

"I was the one who told her to leave, remember?" Kara cut Alex off, "I was afraid that, if something happened to Lena, I would end up like Kal. Oh Rao, imagine if she told me she was pregnant back then? I would be a thousand times more terrified for her life and my decision about breaking up wouldn't change."

"Kara-"

"I was supposed to be Supergirl only while my cousin recovered. It has been almost ten years! He will never recover! But I realized later that I have never recovered too, from abandoning Lena when she needed me the most. For having to carry on all these years without the woman I loved just because I was coward!"

"You were not a coward-"

"Kara?" A third voice called their attention and they turned fast towards the source or it. Lena was standing at the door, someone probably had told her where they were, her green eyes clearly distraught while she looked at the two women. She didn't change much, except for the more mature lines on her face and her hair being at its natural curly state like she would barely let before, she wore the familiar CEO outfit with a two piece suit and heels, "What happened?!"

She walked inside in fast steps while she approached her daughter on the bed. 

"She had an allergic reaction, but she's fine now, I took care of it." Alex coldly replied before Kara could even think of an explanation. She expected Lena to look at her with nothing but anger, but Lena simply sighed in relief, closing her eyes as she caressed her daughter's warm cheek.

"She's a hard shell but still soft inside..." Lena was still looking at Ellie as she whispered that, more for herself than for the two women by her side.

"Yeah, we noticed." Alex crossed her arms in front of her chest and Kara knew that would not end well. She was thankful for Alex always standing up for her, but, sometimes, she wished Alex let her deal with things alone, she was no longer a young teenager in a new planet, "Nice of you to show up, by the way."

Lena stared at Alex and only then Kara noticed how hard Lena was trying to not make eye contact with her. 

"I came as soon as I found out-"

"That Ellie had to run away for her to finally meet her mother?"

"Alex." Kara tried to stop her, feeling her sister's skin burning hot against hers.

"I won't try come up with any excuses for how I handled things for the past few years, because I know that aren't any that will change the fact that I'm the one to blame." She finally looked at Kara, who felt her heart skip a beat and her hands were cold. Lena's eyes were directly on hers and, on the last time that happened, they were both crying and falling apart. She pressed her lips and looked away as quickly as she could, as if she kept looking at Kara the calm mask would fall, "When you told me to leave-"

"Mom?" Ellie's hoarse voice called their attention and they turned towards the girl in a flash. Her blue eyes were a little bit swollen and she looked like she was about to cry. 

"Hey, baby, how are you feeling?" Lena asked her softly, touching her arm. Kara was surprised Lena wasn't angry, at least she didn't look angry, what meant that she probably was angry but keeping it to herself. 

"I want to go home." She mumbled, looking at Kara and Alex, then back at Lena, "I want to go home with you."

Kara pressed her lips, trying to push away the feeling of rejection but being unable to do so. Ellie didn't want to be with her anymore. 

"We can only go when your doctor says you're okay. I'm assuming that's you." Lena looked back at Alex.

"She's fine, but you're not going to just come here and take Ellie-"

"Director! Excuse me." Brainy stopped by the door, his eyes widened when he saw the situation he had just walked into, staring at his fingers while he finished his sentence, "I.... The Alien has been located." 

"Perfect timing." Alex rolled her eyes, then she looked at Kara, who just wasn't in the right mindset to go out and fight whatever, but she let the Alien escape once, she couldn't ignore it.

"I'm on it." She answered quietly. 

"I won't leave town." Lena assured Alex, it wasn't hard for her to assume that was probably what Alex would imply before Brainy interrupted her, "We'll be at my old apartment in town. You can stop by later, Kara. So we can talk." Lena offered, and Kara just nodded, looking at Ellie one last time before she left. 

(....)

Her old apartment didn't feel like home anymore.

As soon as she left her office back in Metropolis she asked Jess to have someone come and clean it up, since it had been closed and empty for almost a decade, she also made sure the fridge would be full, she could never keep a half kryptonian child in a house without any food for too long. When she looked around, everything looked exactly the same as it was when she had left, even though when she left National City for good she wasn't actually living there anymore, just going back and forth for clothes. 

Ellie entered first, not even looking around before laying down on the couch in the middle of the living room. Whatever happened, it made her really upset, since she was always curious and excited about new things. 

"El..." She called her daughter's attention as she approached her and sat by her side on the couch. Ellie looked up at her with sad blue eyes, "We need to talk."

"I know you're angry at me." She said, looking down at her shoes just like she always did when she was embarrassed or intimidated. 

"No, I'm not angry at you. I mean, you can never lie to me about where you are again or you'll be grounded until you're 18 years old." She told her, not even wanting to think about how she felt when she realized where Ellie actually was. It was hours before, she was sat down at her office looking at some paperwork at the same time she made some changes on a prototype she had been working on for a while. The TV was on the background, the volume really low since she just let it on so she didn't feel so lonely, she wasn't actually paying attention to it but, whenever she heard the name "Supergirl", she just had to look at it, it was always stronger than her. When she saw the low quality footage of the fight that happened the night before, she thought she was crazy for even considering that the second laser could belong to Ellie. But she decided to call the summer camp, just to be sure. It didn't kill to be sure, right? Then the staff was confused because they had received an email from Lena days before telling that Ellie would no longer go to the camp. That was when she snapped and tried to call Ellie, but she didn't pick up. She tried to stop shaking, because she knew that, if Ellie was actually with Kara, she was safe. She had to be. 

"Okay."

"But I know that all of this was on me, and I'm sorry you felt like you had to go through all of this just to meet her."

"You kept promising me and you never brought me, three times mom!" Ellie reminded her and crossed her arms in front of her chest in frustration. Lena sighed, not believing in how she let things get to that point. It was all her fault, and she knew. 

"I know, and I blamed it on work but I wasn't being honest with you. The truth is I wasn't ready to face everything I left behind here and I didn't know how to tell Kara I kept our daughter a secret from her without making her hate me." Lena confessed. She never hid from Ellie who her other mother was and tried to teach her most of the things she knew about Kara and about the legacy they both carried from Krypton. When she finally realized that Kara needed to know about Ellie, even if she just told them to leave for their safety, she was never brave enough to go until the end. She once packed her stuff, had everything ready to go, but, on the last minute, she panicked and told Ellie she just couldn't miss this meeting that came up from nowhere. And Ellie was frustrated, but patient, at least it was what Lena thought, "At first it felt right but... It was a mistake. And I'm sorry."

Her biggest fear was the rejection. What would Ellie feel if Kara told them to go as far as possible from her? Even if it was for their safety? Lena didn't want to risk breaking her daughter's heart and breaking hers too, all over again. 

"It's okay mom, I'm not sad with you."

"Are you sad with Kara though? because you seemed pretty upset back there. What happened?" Lena asked her, caressing her hair. It was impossible to not love Kara and she knew that Ellie liked her a lot, specially after spending some time with her. She expected Ellie to beg her to stay and not wanting to be separated from Kara ever again, so her request to go home was certainly unexpected. What went wrong?

"I heard you talking and I heard you say that she told you to leave, and I was sad because I thought you both fought but it was what she wanted."

"Baby, no, it wasn't that simple." Lena shook her head in denial. She could never let Ellie resent Kara in any way, specially due to a misunderstanding or a choice of sides between her mothers. So, the only thing she could do was telling her the truth, "Listen, do you remember Kara's cousin?"

"Superman?"

"Yeah, Superman. A long time ago, when he was still a superhero, something horrible happened to him. A villain, who hated him a lot, found out his secret identity and he..." Too soon to talk about Lex, "He killed someone Superman really loved, his wife, Lois."

"Oh no... did you know her?"

"I did. She was an amazing woman, very kind, intelligent and persistent."

"But why didn't Superman save her?"

"Because he couldn't. The villain did something that took away his powers, he turned the sun red."

"Oh! Kara told me that the sun was red in Krypton, so that means no powers."

"Yes, no powers. Superman turned into a broken man who could no longer be a hero, so Kara told him that she would protect earth on his place, and that's when she became Supergirl. But she was afraid that someone could find out her secret identity, so she broke up with me, to protect me."

"She did it because she loved you?"

"Yes, and I didn't understand her side, I was angry, and I didn't care if I was at risk I just wanted to be with her... At least until I found out I was pregnant with you, then being at risk was the last thing I wanted for you, for us."

"If we stay here with Kara are we in danger?"

"I believe that she will do everything in her power to protect you if she needs to." Lena carefully answered, "There's also Alex, who is already very protective of you as I could notice."

It was to be expected that Alex was angry at her. Lena could've broken up with Kara but still maintain contact with Alex and Sam, but she didn't feel like she could handle anything related to Kara in her life, other than the child that looked so much like her. She knew she would ask about Kara all the time if she called them, if she went out with them. It would always be stronger than her and It would only make her suffer. 

"So, can we stay? Please? I really like her, mom. We went to the supermarket! For real, and she let me inside the cart! And we cooked together and we both used our powers like a team! It was so cool! She taught me how to play UNO too, and I won, she also has a lot of friends and they come over to play games, we didn't actually play much last time because of the bad alien but I bet we will next time. She said you're good at monopoly so you have to teach me."

"I see you had a great time with her." Lena couldn't help but smile. Ellie was so happy and Lena hated herself so much for keeping it from her all because she was scared, "And of course we can stay."

It was the least she felt she could do for her daughter. She would have to move the company back to National City, endure the press and the changes on the stocks, but it was worth it. That was actually the thing that worried her the least about moving back. She would have to build a established relationship with Kara again, they would see each other and they would have to keep it friendly, for the sake of their daughter. And, of course, she would have to go public about Ellie at some point. 

"Thank you!" Ellie hugged Lena tight, luckily not enough to crush her. Lena laughed a little, "I think Kara was sad because I said I wanted to go home"

"Yeah, I think she was, a little bit." Lena actually was sure Kara was upset, eight years without seeing each other wasn't enough to erase all she knew about her. Just by the look in her eyes and Lena knew Kara was hurt. 

"Can we go back there so I can tell her that I want to stay?"

"If she didn't come here yet it's because she's probably still busy, El." 

"Please mom?"

"Alright..." She had been strong and said so many "no" to that cute face, but she just couldn't do it this time, "Let's go."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I payed tribute to the movie in this one
> 
> HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERYONE


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, lena watches the news, drinks some wine, and holds the whole world on her hands

METROPOLIS- EIGHT YEARS AGO

Lena felt her eyes heavy as she watched the TV in front of her. She held a glass of wine that was almost empty, as well as the bottle on the table in front of her, next to her phone that had multiple missed calls, most of them from Alex and Sam. She was wearing a blue sweater that she brought by accident, it was Kara's and somehow ended up in the middle of the stuff that she had brought to her from her old apartment in National City. She didn't know why she was wearing that on the second consecutive night, but it was the only thing that actually helped her sleep, feeling Kara's smell and the soft texture that only her clothes seemed to have. 

Not even Christmas shopping, that people talked about every year as if there was something new to it, took Supergirl's place on the news, they were always about her. How the hero, who Cat Grant labeled as "Supergirl", defeated some villain or helped a cat get down from a tree. Some tabloids were also criticizing the destruction she caused around the city with headlines like "Doing more bad than good?". Either way, Lena wasn't really sure why she kept watching it all the time, she didn't feel like seeing Kara ever again yet there she was, spending hours in front of the TV seeing low quality videos of her fighting and people trying to speculate who she was, where she came from, what was her connection with Superman and where was he. Lena had all those answers already, so she rolled her eyes whenever she had to hear the journalists make terrible guesses. 

She furrowed her eyebrows when she heard the doorbell ring. She got up from the couch, holding on everything she could on the way to the door, a little bit dizzy from the alcohol. 

"Hey. Good to see you." Jack smiled at her when she opened the door.

"Jack? What are you doing here?"

"Well... I heard you moved back so I thought I could drop by. I haven't seen you in a while."

"You heard." Lena gave him an annoyed smile and he had a guilty face. She had been watching news all the time so there was no way she could avoid seeing a few stuff about herself, rumors around the reason why she left at the same time Supergirl emerged. A few of them insinuated that it had something to do with her relationship with the reporter Kara Danvers coming to an end and, of course, there were many insinuations about Lena following in her brother's footsteps. 

"I called, a lot, after.... You know what happened. But you didn't answer. Or called back. But that's okay, I know exactly how Lena Luthor shuts everything she doesn't want around in small boxes. Specially feelings." He was still smiling and Lena sighed, knowing she wouldn't be able to make him leave even though all she wanted was to be alone. They had dated a long time ago, before Lena realized that it wasn't what she wanted, but they remained good friends afterwards, even after she left Metropolis. He was always so good to her. And there he was, when she thought she had lost absolutely everyone and left everything she had behind. 

"You're not leaving, are you?" 

"I brought wine." He showed her the bottle of fine wine. 

"Okay, that's your passport inside, come in." She opened space for him to go inside and he followed her to the couch. Maybe it wasn't so bad that he was around. He was from Metropolis, and his presence could help her feel a little more like home in that place, while talking to Alex or Sam would just make her feel even more miserable for not being where home actually was for her. 

With Kara.

"So, Supergirl, huh." Jack started after noticing what was on TV.

"What's your take?"

"I think it's good for the world to still have someone to look up to. I mean, Superman vanished. Maybe he felt guilty for all of those people that died."

"Maybe." Lena answered, her eyes staring at nowhere as she sat back on the couch. 

"Well, I wouldn't blame you if you resent her, though. I mean-"

"Can we not talk about Supergirl, please?" Lena asked, filling her glass with more wine and only then realizing that Jack didn't have any. 

"I'll help myself." He told her and went off to the kitchen, he had been there before so he knew the place. Lena looked at the TV again, thinking over Jack's words, that he wouldn't blame her for resenting Supergirl, probably because that symbol and that red cape were the last things she saw right before her brother was killed in front of her. Her brother, who was a sick terrorist and she didn't have the right to feel for his death. She turned off the news when Jack sat by her side on the couch, "So, what happened?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're back home, you hate it here, you had a pretty good life back there in National City. I thought you and that girl Kara would be forever, you know." He offered her a weak smile and Lena had to struggle really hard against the tears. While she was dating Kara, she couldn't even imagine a reason strong enough to cause a breakup. She knew that woman was the one, Lena loved every bit of her being, every second she spent by her side were precious. She would never see it coming, "I doubt those rumors about the reason being the one we are not talking about are right."

"In a way." She whispered, luckily low enough for him to not understand what she said, "Is this an interrogation? I thought you came here to drink."

"I'm drinking." He laughed while he took a sip of his wine, "But I want to get things out from you. I know these things want to come out too."

"Well, Kara broke up with me. Are you happy now?"

"I'm sorry, Lena." He squeezed her shoulder, "I really am. I know you loved her. She's an idiot."

"It doesn't matter now. I'm back here, and I have a billion dollars company on my hands, because that son of a bitch I used to call my brother somehow left all of LuthorCorp to me."

"Your mom can't be happy about that."

"I have no idea, but it's not like she's poor. I think it's impossible for a Luthor to be poor, we have many things under our name. And I think that's where I'm going to start changing things."

"The name?"

"Yeah. I'll rename the company and use all of the technology Lex developed to do something good. Can you even start to imagine what I could do to stop climate change using whatever Lex used to turn the sun red?" She told him, and he smiled, happy to see that, even broken, Lena still wanted to create things. And, for Lena, the challenge with the company was just the perfect distraction from everything else. She bet she wouldn't spend every second thinking about Kara if she had her hands full all the time.

"That sounds promising. I'll be here if you need a hand. It has been a while since we worked together."

"That would be great, actually." Lena genuinely smiled, for the first time since she left National City. She was going to be fine. She wasn't as alone as she thought she was, and she would have an objective, "Thanks, Jack."

She got up from the couch to grab a corkscrew to open the bottle Jack had brought, and she was extremely confused when she opened her eyes and realized she was in a hospital bed. The loudest sound was the beep by her side, followed by the voices on the corner of the room, one of them belonged to Jack and the other was unknown, but she could tell it was a woman. She lifted her head a little and watched the two figures as they talked.

"Thanks again." Jack said, "I can't believe they would actually do this. I was worried because she got up for a second and passed out, she didn't seem drunk enough for alcohol to be the responsible."

"I'm not trying to excuse their behavior, but try to understand. There are still people from the Daily Planet in our hands here. Some of them were family, friends."

"It wasn't like Lena did anything." She could tell he was angry, and her eyes slightly widened when she realized what happened, even though she should've expected, she was still surprised. She didn't know why she was suddenly in the hospital, but people apparently refused to treat her. Because of what Lex did. Because she was a Luthor. 

"And that's why I'm here." She answered while wrote something on a clipboard, "I can only imagine how hard things must have been for her lately, but you really should try to keep her from drinking or this baby could get into serious trouble-"

"What?!" Lena exclaimed, giving away she was awake. Jack looked at her with surprise, probably more from what the nurse just said rather than Lena's loud voice. 

"Lena? Are you feeling well?"

"What baby?" She asked, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion as both Jack and the nurse approached her, "I'm not pregnant"

"I'm sorry, but... You are. I ran blood tests."

"It's impossible. Let me see these tests."

"I'm not sure if-"

"I'm a doctor." She told her. The nurse stared at Lena for a few seconds before handing her the clipboard she held. Lena browsed through the papers while Jack just watched with his arms crossed in front of his chest, he was looking at her with certain resent on his brown eyes, he probably believed Lena had been purposely reckless with the pregnancy or that it was the reason for the breakup between her and Kara, but the truth was there was absolutely no way she could actually be pregnant. She had only been with Kara since she met her, so it was impossible.

Kara. Who was an alien. 

So it was possible. She was actually pregnant with Kara's baby.

"Can you leave us alone, please?" She politely requested and the nurse hesitantly nodded.

"Of course. Excuse me." She said before slowly walking out of the room and closing the door behind her. 

"Jack. Can I trust you?"

"Of course you can." He pressed his lips as he stared at Lena expectantly. She was really pregnant, the tests wouldn't lie, and she didn't see how she could do that alone. She would need his help.

"Kara is Supergirl and she is an alien from a planet named Krypton." Lena told him, barely breathing between words.

"Oh-okay." He blinked a few times while he digested that information. 

"And I've never been with anyone but her for the past two years, so the only way I am actually pregnant is if it's with her baby, which may be possible-"

"Because she's an alien." He concluded and Lena nodded, happy he was following, "So you're potentially pregnant with a baby that can shoot lazer through their eyes."

"That could happen, yes."

"That's fine." His voice was squeaky and he felt his hands sweating.

"It would explain why I haven't felt any symptoms, maybe the pregnancy works differently. Either way, I need your help. I can't do this alone and I cant' rely on hospitals because that could expose my baby as an alien and since my relationship with Kara was public if this information is leaked it could expose her as well."

My baby, she repeated the words inside her head. It didn't even make sense for her how fast she cared for the safety of that baby, she only knew about them for a couple of minutes, but she knew she had to protect them. Lena had no idea of how to care for a child, she didn't really have any contact with small children except for Ruby, so she had no idea of what to expect. She also didn't really grow up around examples of what good parenting is supposed to be. But, somehow, she wanted that. 

She would never be alone again. 

"You're not telling her?"

"No. I can't."

"Why?"

"She broke up with me because she was afraid I could be targeted like Lois was."

"Lois? As in Lois Lane? But she was married to Clark Kent." It took him a few seconds to finally get it, "Oh. Oh. Oh no, Lena."

"Yeah."

"Fuck. A kid would be in way more danger if someone found out who she really is."

"I know." She agreed, but what scared her even more was the thought of flying back to National City, telling Kara about the pregnancy, and Kara telling her with even more certainty that she needed to leave. How could Lena possibly endure that?, "I didn't care if I was target but.... I cant risk someone else's life. I understand Kara now, finally."

"Okay. I'm here for you. Just tell me what to do."

And the first month went smoothly. Lena and Jack kept track of the baby's vitals and size as the time went, using the lab that she still had on her apartment. At first, the baby was developing slower than a human baby would, and Lena used that to her advantage, because she could still work normally and attend meetings in person while her belly didn't show, she also wasn't experiencing any kind of sickness or pain, it was almost like she wasn't pregnant at all. 

However, after three more months, the baby started to grow uncontrollably fast, growing the same amount a human baby would take six months to grow in a matter of weeks. After studying the baby a little, she came to the conclusion that, when she found out about the pregnancy, she was maybe already around four months into it, so that made it an eight month pregnancy and the baby, even though was finally bigger, wasn't ready to come out just yet.

That was when Lena stayed home as if she was hiding on a cave. The only people that knew about her pregnancy were Jack and Jess, she would never be able to hide it from her loyal secretary, and she tried her best to keep things going on the company, that she had finally renamed as LCorp, keeping up with the paperwork at her office and continuing to have her meetings but through Skype. 

Things started to get complicated on the last two months of the pregnancy, when she suddenly started to sleep for 12 to 20 hours straight. The baby started to drain all the energy it could from Lena's body, even though she was already eating twice as she remembered Kara used to eat. Lena then started asking herself if the pregnancy had been irregular and long because her body wasn't made to provide the strength that baby needed. Afraid that she could be jeopardizing the baby's well being, she decided to stay in bed for the rest of the pregnancy. It was a choice at first, but then she just didn't have the strength to get up and Jack and Jess were worried sick about her. 

The pregnancy had been unquestionably longer than an ordinary one, and the pattern was completely out of what they had as normal. 

Luckily, the birth wasn't as complicated as the final stages. It was a warm afternoon by the end of July when Lena woke up, unsure of how long she spent sleeping when she first opened her eyes. She checked the digital watch on the nightstand by her side and saw that she had been sleeping for only two hours, what was unlikely of her, at least lately. She looked around, hearing Jack's voice from the living room while he apparently talked to someone on the phone. He had been spending more time there after Lena lost her energy, he saw that as a signal that the baby could be out at any moment, so he wanted to be around. 

Her eyes widened when she realized the bed was all wet. She touched her waist and struggled to sit down on the bed. She didn't feel any pain, but she knew that her water broke. 

"Jack?" She called him, hearing his heavy steps as he ran towards the room, still holding the phone even though it seemed like he had turned off the call, "I think it's time."

"Alright. All good. Okay." He took deep breaths as he walked towards the bathroom right by his side. He turned on the water and, while the bathtub was filled with water, he helped Lena undress and then took her on his hand, carefully putting her inside it. That was when she first felt a contraction and she held the sides of the bathtub tight as she tried to release the tension. She could hear Jack nervously gulping, but both of them prepared themselves for what was supposed to be a normal natural birth. Many women did it, it was going to be just fine. 

It didn't last long hours and Lena didn't feel as much pain as she had been preparing herself to, even though it was still painful. She did most of the work by herself, and, when she felt the baby on her hands, she carefully put them against her chest and felt it's warm skin against her. It was a girl. And she wasn't crying, just calmly resting her head against her mother's chest while she took the first few breaths of her life. Lena was so tired, her forehead sweaty from all the pushing, her lungs struggling to manage pulling the air in and pushing it out, but she still had the strength to look down at her little girl and see her big blue eyes staring right back at her. She smiled, and Jack caressed the baby's cheek with a smile on his face as well. 

She named her Ellie, El, after Kara's real name, Kara Zor-El. She knew that, if the circumstances were different, Kara would love her endlessly, just like Lena already loved her. And, while she held her, she felt like she had the whole world on her hands. 

METROPOLIS- A WEEK AGO

"Mom?" Ellie's voice called her from afar as she heard the girl's steps against the wooden floor. It didn't take Ellie much time to find her mother, she was where she usually spent most of her hours: In her office. Lena was still working, but probably half as much as she used to, but she realized she could get a lot more done from home than she imagined. She was able to keep the company going, investors coming, clients happy, and spend quality time with her daughter, specially during her summer vacations.

"Hey, El. Need something?" Lena asked, her eyes still on the laptop screen as she typed in fast pace a response to an email, she just had a few more ahead of her, then she would be finally free for the day, "I'm almost done with these, then we can do whatever you want."

"Great! But I... I actually wanted to ask you something." 

"Alright."

"Can I... Can I go to a summer camp?" Lena's eyes lifted from the screen instantly. 

"What? A summer camp?"

"Yeah. They have all sorts of activities there, like chemistry, astronomy, sports, cooking, writing it's like a place where kids can find out things they would like to be when they grow up."

"I thought you already knew what you wanted to be." 

"Well, I think I know, because I like cooking, but what if I like... I don't know... soccer even more? I don't want to find out when I'm very very old." 

"El..."

"I know what you're going to say, that i'ts dangerous, that you don't want me to be alone and far away from you, that an accident could happen, but please! It has been a long time since I had any accidents with my powers and I don't have to stay for the rest of the summer, just for a week, then, if I do well, you let me stay more. Please?"

Lena sighed, feeling her chest heavy as she stared at Ellie, who stared back at her with begging eyes. One of Lena's biggest fears was having Ellie expose herself and her powers out there. She was just a child who couldn't even begin to imagine the implications that being revealed to the world was, she also didn't have full control of her powers, so accidents could actually happen. Since she was born, the most far she had gone from Lena was school, and her school was blocks away. It terrified Lena the thought of Ellie needing her and her being far away.

But she was also afraid that her over protectiveness was keeping Ellie from living. She never went out in public with Ellie, never took her to a park, to the movies, to the mall, she used to blame the paparazzi for that, but the main responsible was her fear and she knew it. She tried so hard to be a better mother than Lilian ever was, not that it was hard, but what if she was still a bad mother, just in a different way? It was a simple request, she would be around kids her own age for a week doing fun things. Just a week. What could go wrong?

"Where did you hear about this camp?"

"I took a flyer at school. Here." She handed the paper to Lena, who searched for a phone number on it.

"Look, I'll call them to find out more about this place, and we'll talk later, okay?"

"Really?! Thank you!" Ellie jumped in excitement and kissed Lena's cheek abruptly. Lena blinked a few times, a little bit stunned, but she felt nothing but happiness to see how happy Ellie was, "I'll go play, see you later!"

She then flew towards the hallway that leaded to her bedroom, and Lena slightly smiled at that. She then stared back at the flyer, the camp was located in National City, and that small piece of information made her heart skip a beat, but she dialed the number on the bottom of the paper. She talked with the woman in charge for about half an hour, making dozens of questions about the activities, the cabins, how many kids were there, their age, if it was possible to attend for only a week, if they could be discrete about a Luthor kid joining. All of the answers she received pleased her, but even if they didn't, she wouldn't have the heart to say no to Ellie, not after she was so happy with only the possibility of receiving a positive answer to her request.

When she had all the information she needed and wrote down their email so she could formally enroll Ellie, she ended the call and opened the drawer on the right side of her desk to put the flyer, in case she needed it later. The only other thing inside that drawer was a white envelope with Ellie's name on it. Lena sighed while she took it, she should have given that to Ellie a week before, on her birthday, it was supposed to be one of her gifts but, once again, Lena wasn't brave enough to do through with it. Inside, there were expired plane tickets to National City, meaning that they would finally go there, she would finally meet Kara... But Lena was still scared of the possibility of Kara telling them to leave for their safety or other outcomes that could become worse as the time passed and she kept Ellie's existence hidden. What if Kara never forgave her? What if she refused to listen or to even try to understand Lena's reasons? 

She threw the envelope on the bin next to her, but she told herself that on the moment she picked up Ellie from the camp, they would go see Kara. She couldn't keep pushing it away and maybe if they already were in National City it would make things easier. She owed it to Ellie. She owed it to Kara. And she owed it to herself too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was your last flashback chapter and now, after 7 chapters into a supercorp fic, they'll finally get to proper interact!!! yay


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, everyone talks like adults

NATIONAL CITY- PRESENT DAY

"What are you doing here?" Alex confronted Lena as soon as she saw her entering the main room of the DEO. There was a fuss of agents around the room, many of them sat down on computers and the rest looking at the big screens that displayed Supergirl's fight against the alien she went after. However, Lena didn't even need to look at the screens to notice that things were not going well for Supergirl. Everyone else's faces gave that away very quick.

"Ellie wanted to talk to Kara. And she, of course, couldn't wait until later." Lena explained.

"Kara is still in the middle of something." Alex pressed her lips, as if trying really hard to not be rude, since Ellie was there too. The girl let go of her mother's hand and ran towards the middle of the room. Lena tried to hold her down but the girl was obviously faster. Where she was standing, she couldn't see Kara being violently beaten up by a huge creature as clearly as they could see it in the middle of the room. She didn't want Ellie to be scared.

"Ellie, come back here." Lena called her as she followed her daughter, Alex doing the same right after. She glanced at the screen and grimaced when she saw Kara's head beating against the concrete floor. 

"Can I talk to her?" Ellie asked, Lena wasn't really sure to who. 

"Ellie, no. Let's go, Kara is busy." She told her, and Ellie gave her a frustrated look. 

"But she's losing!" Ellie said, desperately. 

"She will be fine." Lena tried to calm her down, holding her shoulders and slightly turning her away from the screens.

"Actually..." Alex said, taking off her earpiece, "Maybe it will help get her mind back here."

"Are you sure about this?" Lena asked, uncomfortable. She hated that Ellie was watching so closely as Kara was fighting, talking to her while she did it didn't make her feel any better. Just by remembering that Ellie was in the middle of an actual fight just a day ago made her feel sick. Alex, of course, just ignored her question and gave the earpiece to Ellie. It was too big for her, so she just held it against her ear. 

"Kara?" Ellie called, both her and Alex ignoring Lena's question.

"Ellie?!" Lena was close enough to hear Kara's surprised voice, it sounded like a whisper, "You're at the DEO?"

"Yes! I came to tell you that mom and I will stay here! I was so happy I couldn't wait." She told her.

"That's awesome news." Kara answered, breathlessly as she dodged her opponent's attacks. Lena couldn't really tell if Ellie was actually helping or just distracting her even more. 

"Now, come on, mommy, punch this bad guy in the face." And, as if Ellie said some kind of magic word, Kara actually landed a perfect punch, "Yeah! That was amazing!"

Kara then kept beating him up as if it was the easiest possible job. She hit him with her laser vision inside his mouth as he roared at her making him stunned by the pain. It took just a few more punches and he dropped down unconscious. Alex sighed in relief and she gave Ellie a high five.

"Good job, agent Ellie." She smiled at her niece before taking her earpiece back and commanding a team to capture the alien and put it back on prison. The agents were walking inside in fast pace as they continued to do their jobs, and it didn't take much time for Supergirl to land at the balcony. She smiled instantly when she saw Ellie, who ran towards her and hugged her legs.

"Hey, little girl. Thanks for the words of encouragement." Kara thanked her and Ellie grinned. Kara's look then shifted towards Lena, who hesitantly approached them. 

"Hi." She greeted Kara awkwardly, "Good... Punching. You're good at that."

"Thanks." Kara laughed a little, "Are you... Actually staying here? In National City?"

"I am. I'll just have to arrange a few things."

"Thank you. Really."

"Thank you?" Alex sarcastically laughed as she passed by. 

"Alex." Kara called her back and Alex turned towards them, "That's enough."

"What?"

"I know you're frustrated with what happened, I am too, but you're acting just like Eliza used to act and you hated it: You're making it look like I'm not responsible for anything that happens in my life and putting the blame in someone else. This someone else used to be you, and now its Lena?"

"Kara..." Alex eyes widened in surprise and so did Lena's. It took a lot for Kara to lose her patience, especially with Alex. 

"I love you, and I love that you'll always stand up for me, but this is between me and Lena."

"Very well." Alex nodded, and walked away before Kara could say anything else. She sighed, disappointed with her sister's behavior lately, but relieved that she finally let her feelings about that out.

"I'm sorry about Alex."

"It's alright. She's your sister." Lena waved off the apology.

"That doesn't excuse her being an ass to you."

"We have our history too. I never even said goodbye to her, Kara. I just left and-"

"Aunt Alex doesn't like you?" Ellie looked at her mother with confused eyes.

"Of course she does." Kara answered before Lena could think of a proper response to that, "Look, I still have some work to do, but if I could... Drop by later..."

"Absolutely. We'll be there waiting this time. Right, El?"

"Right." Ellie had a guilty smile on her face and started staring at her shoes. Lena grabbed her hand so they could walk outside together, "Bye, mommy."

"See you later."

Later exceeded Kara's expectations since things started coming up at the DEO out of nowhere, but Kara did everything she had to with an extra motivation on that day, still thrilled after being called "mommy" by Ellie for the first time. She felt like she had somehow accomplished the greatest mission and earned the biggest honor. After she was done with all her tasks, she was at Lena's doorstep ringing the bell around 10pm. It didn't take much time for Lena to answer, greeting her with a small smile after she opened the door. 

"Hey. I'm sorry I'm here this late, a few things came up."

"No problem. Come in, please." She opened space for Kara, who walked inside shyly as she looked at her familiar surroundings. The apartment looked pretty much the same as she remembered, there were some boxes on the living room, some toys that were apparently lego were all around the rug between the couch and the TV. It looked like Lena already had some of her stuff moved there and that almost impressed Kara, until she remember how rich Lena was, so moving wouldn't be much of a problem for her, "All done with Supergirl work today?"

"Yeah, things are good for now." Kara nodded as she followed Lena to the couch, she put some of the lego pieces out of the way as they sat down. Only then Kara was able to see what appeared to be a small village around an incomplete castle built with the lego pieces. The complexity of each element impressed Kara, "Where's Ellie, by the way?"

"I've put her to bed a while ago. Wasn't she sleeping at your place around this time?"

"Yes, sure." Kara badly lied and Lena gave her a suspicious look, but she was smiling. The two of them looked at each other, the awkward silence taking place between them. The most anticipated moment for both of them, the moment where they would finally talk, "Lena-"

"I'm sorry, can I- can I go first? Please?" Lena asked, and Kara agreed with a nod, "Okay. Listen, Kara, I'm really, really sorry that I kept Ellie from you all this time. It didn't make sense for me back then sacrificing our relationship because of the relative fear of something that could never happen, but, when Ellie was in the picture, I finally understood where you were coming from and I didn't want to risk her safety. Also, and this probably scared me even more, I was afraid of flying back here, telling you I was pregnant with the hope that we could do it together, and then you tell me to leave anyways."

"I would very likely have done that, yes."

"And then, as she started to grow up, I could barely live with myself, I guess the guilt of keeping you two separated became even with my fears and insecurities. She has so much of you, Kara. And I'm not even talking about her looks its... everything. She is just so sweet and innocent, so excited about the world, probably a walking ray of sunshine. It was impossible to not think of you in all moments whenever she was around. When I decided to leave everything else aside and just come to you, another fear came along, the fear of telling you the truth and you never forgiving me. I swear, I told Ellie we would come three times, and there was this fourth time where I never told her but I bought the plane tickets to give her for her birthday but I just... Panicked every time and... You didn't deserve being kept from her..."

"Lena, It's okay." Kara squeezed her shoulder when Lena started to sob, crashing down as she finally let all those feelings she had been keeping within herself for the past eight years. Kara didn't really blame her for anything, specially after hearing all of that. Lena made the choice she thought was best for Ellie, it didn't mean it was the right choice, but, in any moment, she did it in any sort of revenge against Kara for ending things with her. So how could Kara possibly hate her for that?

She wanted to be there for Ellie from the beginning, if she could turn back time and make things go differently, she would. But she couldn't do that, the best she could do was being there for Ellie from that moment on.

"It's not okay. I'm sorry, Kara. I really am."

"I know. And I understand the decisions you made. Because, if you came to me pregnant eight years ago... I would have told you to move from the country and stay as far away from me as possible. I was also afraid, afraid of being Supergirl and messing it up and putting everyone in danger, I felt like a timed bomb ready to explode. But, after the time went on I realized that I should never have broken up with you out of the fear of a possibility. I grew, I learned things, and now I know that I would fight until my last breath for my family if I needed to. If I can't have the ones I love close to me, then what is the point? So, I'm sorry too. I wish I could undo everything, so we could have done this together, but I can't, and I'm sorry."

They stared at each other in silence for a few moments, both with tears on their eyes, before wrapping one another in a tight hug that lasted long minutes, they hadn't felt each other in so long so neither of them wanted to let go. But they still had things to talk about, so, when they were both ready, they broke apart, Lena wiped her tears with the back of her hand and Kara did the same but with the sleeve of her sweater. 

"So, I have to tell you something. I asked my mother about the possibility of the pregnancy happening-"

"Wait, your mother? Your mother from Krypton?" Lena's eyes widened.

"Well, not her her, the hologram she left on my pod. It's a long story, honestly, the short version is that the DEO had my pod all these years and also my mother's hologram, that was programmed to give me answers about... The universe, as much as my mother knew. It's almost like talking to her again."

"I can't even imagine how you felt."

"I had a hard time for a while, but now I'm grateful that I have that small fragment of her with me." Kara had a genuine smile on her face, "But, well, she basically said... I can't be impregnated by a human male, my uterus wouldn't be able carry a human baby, but, I can impregnate human females.... If I... Mate them."

"If you mate them? What does that mean?"

"Well, basically means that I have to be strongly emotionally attached to this human and I have to... Have an orgasm. Only by my body touching yours would be enough for the pregnancy to happen, but the chances were really, really low. She gave me a percentage but I don't really remember exact numbers right now. But now I know how to prevent it! With red sun lamps. I mean, not that I'm assuming that we will do anything again and we would need-"

"Okay, Kara, I get it, thank you." Lena slightly raised her hands, begging Kara to stop talking.

"She also told me something about the pregnancy potentially being different than an ordinary human pregnancy, due to our DNA being different, so... How was it?"

"It lasted 11 months."

"Rao! That's a lot."

"Every test I did pointed at me being already 4 months into it when we split up. However, it took Ellie some time to start growing, I didn't even have any symptoms, that's why it took me some time to find out. But, when she started to grow, it was almost like all at once. I wasn't really sure if it was that irregular and that long because I'm human and my body isn't as strong as yours, but I guess I am now. The last few months were the only ones where it got actually difficult."

"What happened?"

"I slept most of the days. I didn't have the energy to do anything other than stay in bed, and I promise you I wasn't overworking myself before that." Lena assured her, but Kara furrowed her eyebrows, not really believing that, "I promise! The birth went smoothly, and El was born healthy, so that's all that matters."

"I love that you call her El."

"It's because of you, actually. Kara Zor-El." Lena's words made Kara want to cry again, but this time, with happiness, "I did my best to... Have you in her life somehow. I told her the little I knew about Krypton, and as many things as I could about you. I also I never let her call your family coat of arms "an S", I remembered how much that annoys you."

"And for that I'm very grateful." Kara laughed a little, Lena followed her right after, "Really, Lena. You could've tried to erase me completely, but you didn't, so thank you."

"It was the least I could do."

"When did her powers start showing?"

"She was 9 months old when she levitated for the first time." Lena told her with a smirk, "The first time with the laser eyes she was... five? She got upset at some cartoon and shot at the TV in frustration. It exploded. Almost started a fire."

"Whoa." Kara was speechless. She didn't expect things to have been this chaotic and was impressed that Lena kept everything under control.

"Slowly, she started to have more control over herself. It killed me how sad she got when an accident happened. I thought of putting red sun lamps in the house, I guessed it would inhibit her powers without hurting her but, if I did that, she would be used to them and it would make harder for her to be in control when she wasn't around them."

"It makes sense. She told me about how it upsets her too, and I'll do what I can to help."

"Thank you. Things will be easier for her with you around, I'm sure."

"And how... How are things going to be? From now on?" Kara was afraid to ask that, but she had to at some point.

"Well... I guess we have to figure out how to co-parent. I understand you have two jobs, one of them being a little bit unpredictable, so I think that Ellie should still live with me, here."

"Yeah, of course." Kara nodded, trying to clear off the thoughts of the perfect fairy tale where they would instantly become a happy family and live together as if nothing had ever happened, "It makes total sense, I also don't even have room in my apartment for her to have her own bedroom. I need to fix that."

"You can have her over whenever you want." Lena assured her, making sure Kara didn't feel left out or less of a mother for not having Ellie living with her,"I honestly don't know how to talk about her publicly and explain that we're both her mothers, specially considering our breakup and how much she looks like us. I just know I have to do it, I can't keep hiding Ellie."

"We could always make something up about insemination or in-vitro, maybe we could say we did it before the breakup."

"That sounds believable." Lena agreed. The doorbell rang and they exchanged a confused look. Kara lowered her glasses and looked through the door, sighing when she saw who it was.

"It's Alex."

"I'll open the door." Lena walked towards the front door, and Kara asked herself how could she seem so unbothered by how Alex had been treating her lately. She opened the door, and Alex silently stepped inside. Kara got up from the couch, giving her sister a puzzled look as she tried to find out what she was doing there, holding a bottle of wine. 

"I'm sorry, If I'm interrupting you guys." Alex said as she offered Lena the bottle, "I brought a peace offer."

"Wine." Lena slightly smiled as she took the bottle, "Why does everyone think they can win me over with wine?"

"Because they can." Alex playfully said, with no sarcasm this time. 

"Yeah, you're right." Lena admitted. 

"I'm here to apologize. For everything." Alex went straight to the point, "First to you, Kara, for acting like I had any control over your life. I'll probably still do that, but please tell me if I go too far."

Kara slightly laughed, but nodded, relieved that her sister was coming around.

"And second to you, Lena, for being an asshole and never giving you a chance to explain yourself, for putting all the blame on you. I just... Lose my damn mind when things are about Kara and I seem to never be able to see the bigger picture." She sighed, sounding really embarrassed of herself. She had been raised her whole life with the mindset that Kara was the priority so, even after Eliza herself had taken everything back and told Alex she was supposed to be her own priority, Alex still let that mindset take over her reason most of the times, " I thought over everything that happened, and I also talked to Sam, who luckily is the brain of the relationship, and I realized that I would do anything to ensure Ruby's safety, the same way you did for Ellie. Also, I was pissed off when you shut me out, when you shut Sam out. I mean, she had been your friend for so long, I've never seen her sadder then when you left with no notice. But you had too much on your plate, I know that now. So... I'm really sorry."

"It's alright, Alex. I understand."

"Thank you, for being understanding. That makes two things you're better at me at. The other is Monopoly. And I still hate you for that." She joked and Lena cracked a laugh. Then, they both hugged tightly and Kara felt extremely happy to finally see things falling into place again. 

"Where's Sam?" Lena asked, and Kara sensed she was worried about Sam being angry at her, since she didn't come with her wife. 

"She wanted to come and say hello, but we couldn't leave Ruby alone."

"Oh, of course."

"Don't worry, you'll see her tomorrow. Because we have been summoned to go to mom's place for the weekend.

"What?" Kara asked, nervously. Then it hit her that Eliza had no idea about her daughter, she didn't even think about telling her, she had been struggling to deal with that new reality and she didn't feel ready to share with other people who would struggle to deal with that too. But it was impossible to hide things from Eliza anyways. 

"She called and I kind of had to tell her the truth." Alex gave Kara an apologetic look, "She demanded we go to Midvale, because she can't come here anytime soon."

"Oh no, you mad at me I can take but Eliza?" Lena gulped and Alex slightly laughed. 

"Don't worry she is unable to be angry at anyone who isn't called Alex Danvers." 

"Well, Ellie can go with you guys, but I have things to do here, a lot of things. Like, so so many." Lena tried to run from the situation, but Alex just shook her head.

"No way, miss Luthor, she specifically said all of us and that means you too."

"Shit."

"So whatever you have to do you're solving it through the phone." Alex commanded, and Lena didn't even try to insist because she knew she couldn't escape from that, "Now I better get going."

"You're not drinking this with me?" Lena asked her, finding it weird that Alex would let go of an opportunity to drink.

"No, after all I've said to you and about you I think you deserve the whole bottle." 

"Fair enough." Lena smiled, and Kara saw Alex leaving as an opportunity for her to leave too. It was starting to get a little more than what she could handle, it all felt way too familiar as how things used to be before all the mess. She should be happy and thankful that things got resolved that smoothly, but of course it wasn't that easy. 

"I'm coming with you. Wait for me by the elevator?" Kara asked Alex, who nodded before leaving Lena's apartment. She looked back at Lena, whose eyes stared at her with expectancy.

"You don't really have to go, you know." Kara told her, feeling a little bit selfish for trying to talk her out of going to Eliza's place for the sole reason that she wasn't sure if her heart would make it through the whole weekend if Lena was there too. Being around family and not having Lena being her family the way she wanted her to be would be the closest to torture Kara would ever get, "I'm sure you have a lot to do."

"I do, but I can make it work." Lena assured her, and Kara pressed her lips, trying to hide her desperation over the fact she would spend two days under the same roof as Lena again without being able to kiss her. She wondered how Lena was feeling about that. Did she still feel anything at all for Kara?

Because Kara never stopped having feelings for her. While Lena had been living with the guilt of keeping Ellie hidden, Kara carried the weight of sending the love of her life away and never being able to take her off her mind. Lena remained the first thing she thought about in the morning, everyday, for eight years, at least until Ellie came around, then Kara started thinking about both of them. 

Kara and Lena. Each one with their own burdens to carry. 

"Alright. Then I guess I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yep. See you tomorrow."


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter they share a bed. sort of.

This is fine, Lena told herself as she watched the trees that were staying behind as the car moved forward in the direction of Midvale.

She had the chance to turn it down when Kara offered her a way out but, even though she tried to cling to it, her brain betrayed her and the words "I can make it work" slipped against her will. She had worked so hard over the years to keep her feelings for Kara quiet, it was a true struggle when absolutely nothing she did successfully made her love Kara less, because even the act of breaking up with her, the only thing Kara ever did that was able to create any resentment on Lena's mind, had been an act of love.

Going to Midvale would be like opening some kind of Pandora box inside her mind and all her fears would come out and wreak havoc.

These fears were not only her feelings for Kara, but also how she felt when she was around her family as well. Eliza was the most welcoming and loving person she knew, she made Lena feel wanted, feel like she was home, in a way that her actual family never made her feel. She didn't feel out of place while she was in Midvale, drinking tea with the Danvers women at the deck while they watched the waves from afar, watching Kara and Alex fight over who was supposed to do the dishes, trying to fit in Kara's single bed while they slept together (with the door open). Lena was living the absolute dream, with the woman she loved and wouldn't change anything about and her chaotic group of family and friends that Lena grew to love as if they were her own.

It would be hard for her to remind herself that she wasn't there as part of that family anymore. Of course, she was one of Ellie's mothers, but that was pretty much it, the only attachment she had to them and they would probably slowly push her away. For that, at least, she was ready. It always happened to her at some point.

"Hello? Earth to Lena Luthor." Sam's voice called her back to reality and she blinked a few times, only on that moment realizing how close they were from the house.

"I'm sorry, did you say anything?"

"I said many things, I'm not sure in which part I lost you" Sam laughed a little, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." She lied, badly, and Sam sighed, clearly not believing it. They were by themselves on that car, while Kara, Alex, Ruby and Ellie were on the other one in front of them. They split up like that since they didn't all fit in one car and so no one would have go alone. That also gave Lena and Sam the chance to talk, Sam had been really understanding towards Lena and everything she had to say, Lena also apologized for shutting Sam out, then they just talked about what they lost in each other's lives during the time they didn't talk. Sam told her about her weeding, that happened about a year after Lena left. She handled Lena her phone and showed her the pictures that she had, so Lena could actually see rather than just hear about it. Lena teared up a little when she saw Sam in her weeding dress, looking like an actual princess with a flower crown. The party was absolutely beautiful, everything looked in perfect harmony, the flowers, the colors, the venue. Sam and Lena had promised they would be each others bridesmaids and plan their weeding so, seeing how everything went without her, made Lena feel even worse for the choices she made.

Her mind also wandered around the fact that she and Kara would probably have married too, maybe even before Sam and Alex did, since they started dating first. Lena had been thinking about it around the time where everything went wrong. She was already sure that Kara was the one, but she wasn't ready to propose just yet. She loved the life they had together, and she was afraid of the implications that being married would bring to their lives. So she thought she could wait, she had all the time in the world to propose. And then, all of a sudden, her time was over.

She felt a little better when the conversation shifted to their kids. Lena was really shocked to see how much Ruby had grown since she last saw her, when she was still barely a child. Sam told Lena about Ruby's love for sports and how hard she worked to be in the school's soccer team, while Lena shared with Sam some of the most impressive things Ellie had done in the kitchen and a little bit about a few of the accidents with her powers. Slowly, it felt like nothing had ever happened between them, and Lena was really grateful for that, for how everything seemed to be working in her favor, at least once in her life.

For a long time, Sam was everything Lena had and, together, they found a family, the same family.

"I was really surprised you didn't do everything in your power to sit this one out."

"Me too." Lena laughed even though she didn't find the situation funny at all, "I don't know what happened."

"Your heart spoke for your head as it seems." Sam offered her a sympathetic smile, and Lena swallowed the truth: She wanted to go with them. She didn't want to be alone, "How did it go by the way? With Kara?"

"Like any conversation between adults about their children."

"And you two didn't touch the subject "you two" in any moment of this adult conversation?"

"What do you think?"

"Oh my god you're both insufferable."

"Sam, it's not like we're just going to go back together as if nothing ever happened just because we understood each other. Kara probably doesn't even feel anything for me anymore, most certainly after she found out I kept her daughter from her. She forgave me, of course, and that's even more than what I deserve so I don't feel like expecting anything else."

"Lena-"

"Please, Sam, just don't." Lena turned her head to the car window again. If she had to go through that weekend by Kara's side, she didn't need anyone calling her out for her feelings. She then finally recognized where she was, really close to Eliza's house, at least if she remembered it right, it had been a long time since she went there. When she looked frontwards she realized that she was right when she saw the two story gray house just a few meters from them. Sam stopped the car right behind Alex's, the garage was already occupied by Eliza's SUV, but luckily the front yard had enough room for both vehicles to share.

She looked at Sam, who was looking down and had her lips pressed, making that face she always did when she had something to say but was trying her best to hold it back, analyzing if it was her place or not. Before she decided, Lena opened the door and got out of the car. Ellie did the same a few seconds after, flying towards her mother, who opened her arms to catch her in the air. At first, she had a small heart attack at the sight of her daughter flying like that in the open, but then she remembered that it was safe, since Eliza had no close neighbors.

"Your first car trip! How was it?" She asked Ellie, who had her arms around Lena's neck.

"It seemed like it would never end, I didn't like it. And when I tried to play games with Ruby my head hurt." She complained and Lena pressed a kiss against her forehead as she watched everyone else getting out of the cars and stretching their legs. She expected Ellie not to like the trip, she was full of energy and had to be entertained and stimulated at all times, during the summer she had even more, so the source of all of that energy was most likely in her kryptonian blood.

"Look at the bright side, we're here now! You'll see the beach for the first time, you'll also meet Eliza." Lena reminded her and Ellie smiled widely. She was happy that her daughter would finally get to live and have all the experiences she looked forward to.

"Is she alright?" Kara asked as she approached them. Lena gulped, it was still hard for her to have Kara around, but she had to get used to it since it would become a regular thing, "She was pretty upset in the car."

"She's just not made to be sitting still for too long." Lena explained and Kara nodded. The awkwardness of the moment ceased when Eliza opened the front door, waving at them. Ellie then held Lena a little bit tighter, always anxious about meeting new people.

"Hey, little girl, it's alright. I was nervous before meeting Eliza too, but she happens to be one of the nicest people on earth." Kara assured her, and Lena loved how soft and caring Kara was towards their daughter, "Okay?"

"Okay" Ellie suddenly seemed more confident after Kara shared her own experience, getting down from Lena's arms and grabbing her hand. But, before they walked towards Eliza, she grabbed Kara's hand too, and they approached the front door together, Lena struggling to remain calm as they walked like that, like a real, happy family. Alex was the first in line for the hugs, her wife and daughter right after. When it was Kara's turn, her mother hugged her a little longer than she did with everyone else, whispering something that Lena couldn't catch. Her heart was pounding when Eliza looked at her, her eyes had only affection, still, Lena didn't feel any calmer, fearing that Eliza's anger towards her could be worse than Alex's was.

"It's so good to see you again, Lena." She told her with a smile, and Lena just smiled back, but she knew Eliza had more than that to say to her, she just wouldn't do it right away. Eliza's eyes shifted to Ellie, who looked at her with expectancy, "Oh, God, look at you. You look so much like your mothers!"

"I do?" Ellie asked.

"You do. You are the perfect mix between both of them" Eliza told her with a smile, Kara and Lena's heartbeats were racing as they watched those two interacting, "I'm Eliza, Kara and Alex's mother."

"I'm Ellie. Can I call you grandma?" She straightforwardly asked and Eliza laughed softly. Lena was always amazed by how fast Ellie shifted from painfully shy to comfortably outgoing.

"Of course you can. Now, come in, it must have been a long trip-"

"Look! It's the sea!" Ellie let go of her mothers' hands and jumped inside when she saw the sea through the windows at the back of the living room. Everyone around her smiled at her excitement, "It's everywhere! Yet I have never seen it before. Can we go swimming? Will you teach me, mommy?"

"First we need to bring our bags inside. Want to help me?" Kara asked and Ellie strongly nodded, following her outside, back to the cars. When they returned, Eliza's eyes widened when she saw the amount of weight Ellie was carrying, she knew the little girl had pretty much the same powers as Kara, but she was just so little and had on her hands a suitcase that was almost her size plus a backpack on her back.

Ellie was too excited to go to the beach, luckily Lena had foreseen that and bought her a swimsuit, the most colorful one in the store since anything else would probably disappoint her. Eliza had prepared lunch, but they decided to keep it for the dinner and prepare some sandwiches instead, so there was no risk of feeling sick for swimming after eating. Lena sat down on the deck of the house's backyard, that was directly connected to the beach so, from where she was sitting, she could watch as Kara and Ellie played in the water. Ruby, Alex and Sam were playing badminton, Lena was surprised to see how skilled Sam was at that, since the Sam she knew wasn't even close of an sports enthusiast, but she probably grew fonder of them as Ruby revelead herself to be an athlete.

"Don't feel like going in the water?" Eliza asked as she sat by Lena's side, she had been inside until that moment, preparing some lemonade.

"Not really. I hate what the salt does to my hair." She told Eliza, who slightly laughed.

"She looks like an amazing kid." Eliza commented as she looked at Ellie. Kara was apparently teaching her how to swim bellow the waves.

"She is. She is... Everything." Lena couldn't help but smile.

"I know how it feels. Trying to hide a little girl from the world while all she wants to do is see the world."

"It broke my heart every time I had to say no to her, or telling her to hide who she really was." Lena confessed, and Eliza's affectionate eyes were staring at her.

"Oh, lord, it was horrible for me too. Kara just... Didn't seem to understand in how much danger she would be if she exposed herself. Luckily, as she got older, things got clearer."

"That's what I'm hoping with Ellie. I have a feeling that she'll listen to Kara better than she listens to me, since Kara actually understands what she goes through."

"I'm sure she'll guide her." Eliza squeezed Lena's shoulder, and she was so surprised at the direction things were on. She didn't expect that heart to heart conversation with Eliza, she never really stopped to think that they lived similar experiences. She thought Eliza would be furious at her, she was even more protective of Kara than Alex was, she was the one who taught Alex to be like that after all. But, all that happened there was an experience sharing, a way of both of them to know they were not alone.

"I was scared that you would be angry at me." Lena confessed.

"Lena, of course that, from the moment I knew about Ellie, I started to wonder about the reasons why you kept her from us, but I know you enough to be absolutely sure you didn't keep her hidden out of any kind of revenge or anything of sorts. Kara ended things with you in the worst possible moment of your life and finding out you were pregnant with an alien baby after everything that happened... It was too much. Wasn't it?"

"Y-Yeah... It was. At first I was afraid for her safety too, all of that about being a target didn't bother me, until the moment where Ellie could be a target too. When I finally got over that, I was afraid that Kara would push us away If I came to her, and I didn't know how I would explain to Ellie that her mother wanted her as far as possible. And It was just... It was impossible to not be happy around Ellie, you know? But I never lost that feeling of undeserved happiness. Every time she made me smile, I felt guilty."

"You deserve every bit of happiness that she has given you. You had her interests at heart when you did what you did."

"I can't lie to you, I was also afraid for myself. Afraid that I would never recover if Kara told me to leave again. And ever more terrified that she could never forgive me, that she could hate me"

"Oh, sweetie, I don't think Kara would ever be able to hate you. What you two had was... Well, it's not my place to say anything." Eliza shook her head and tried to focus back on the subject, and Lena felt grateful at that, she wasn't sure she was ready to hear Eliza's take on her relationship with Kara, "But I understand where you are coming from. I wish things had been simple and that we could have been all together, every step of the way, but I also believe that some things are destined to happen in the right time." Eliza said, both of them looking at Kara and Ellie as they appeared to be having the best time of their lives. Maybe Eliza was right, maybe it only happened on that moment because everyone involved was ready to take it.

"I think you're right."

"Of course I am" Eliza joked with a smile on her face, "You're too hard on yourself, Lena. But you still have a family here."

Lena felt her eyes burn, again feeling like she didn't deserve that amount of affection or comprehension. Eliza wrapped her on a hug and she struggled not to cry, but a few tears rolled down her face anyways.

Only when the sun was setting they decided it was enough of the beach for the day. Eliza had made them roasted chicken for dinner, which was filled with a vivid conversation between all of them. Ellie and Eliza talked about the chicken recipe, Ruby filled them all in about the things she had been doing at school related to sports, Sam and Alex talked a little about work and about the remodeling of their home, Kara mostly just listened and commented, the same as Lena did, until they asked her about how the company and the moving was going. Everyone sitting there, casually talking, felt so right, so much like home, and Lena wished it never had to end. 

Eventually, Eliza told them she had the night shift at the hospital and would only be back in the morning so, even though the family had outgrown the size of the Danvers' house, they all would have a place to sleep on that night. Alex and Sam would be on Eliza's room, Kara and Lena would sleep on the sisters room, where each of them would have a bed so no awkwardness at all, and the girls would share the sofa bed since they were planning on watching movies until later (The adults shouldn't know about the until later part, but Ellie accidentally let it slip).

Lena fell asleep fast, she felt incredibly tired, maybe her mind more than her body. But, It didn't matter how tired she was, she would always be a light sleeper. So, when the small hands touched her shoulder, her eyes opened fast and alert, waking up from her dreamless sleep.

"What's wrong?" She whispered to Ellie, who was standing by the bed's side in her penguin pajamas, staring at her with wide blue eyes. 

"We were watching an horror movie and now I can't sleep." She told Lena, who sighed and sat on the bed as she rubbed her eyes. Lena glanced at Kara, who was still asleep, her peaceful face turned towards them as she breathed calmly while rested. 

"What movie did you watch?" She couldn't hide she was annoyed, since it was obvious a bad idea to watch scary movies before bed, even Ellie knew that. 

"I don't remember the name but there was a haunted house and some children and the house had a mouth with big teeth and wanted to eat them." Ellie's eyes got teary and if Lena was ever irritated she completely forgot about it, opening her arms to wrap her daughter in a tight hug. She was pretty sure Ellie never actually watched any scary movie, none of them ever caught her attention, and that movie in particular, Monster House, if Lena remembered correctly, was supposed to be for children. 

"Hey, It's okay, It's just a movie." 

"What's happening?" Kara whispered from her bed across the room, looking at Lena and Ellie with sleepy blue eyes, "Are you alright, little girl?"

"She's just scared of a movie she saw with Ruby." Lena explained.

"What movie?"

"I think it was Monster House."

"Oh Rao, I still have nightmares because of this one. Why would you guys even watch this?" Kara said and Lena grimaced, quietly saying "This is not helping."

"El, you can sleep here with me tonight, okay?"

"Mommy, come lay down here with us please?" Ellie asked Kara. 

"There's no way we can fit the three of us in one bed." Lena told her. 

"Oh." Ellie furrowed eyebrows and got down from Lena's lap, grabbing the bed by its side and pulling it towards Kara's bed.

"Hey! Stop, you're going to wake everyone up!" Lena complained and Ellie stopped for a second, simply lifting the bed enough for it to not touch the floor as she pulled it. Kara let out a burst of laughter at the scene, putting her hands over her mouth right after, "What's so funny, Kara?"

"Nothing, I'm not even laughing." Kara put on a serious face, at least she tried, but she was still smiling.

And Lena smiled too. 

"Better now?" Kara asked after Ellie laid down between them.

"Yes, now I'm protected through both sides." Ellie nodded. It took her a while to fall asleep, and both Kara and Lena were still awake when that happened, both of them watching their daughter to make sure she was okay. Ellie was mostly on Lena's bed, but her hand was resting on Kara's waist, hugging her as if she was a teddy bear. 

"She's so perfect." Kara involuntarily said, her eyes staring at Ellie as she peacefully slept between them. Even though she was there, Kara and Lena were close enough to each other to feel one another's breath against their face. Still, there was no tension. 

"Yes. She is." Lena nodded with a smile on her face. 

"It still shocks me when I see her using her powers." Kara whispered, still a little bit alarmed after seeing Ellie carrying the bed with Lena on it as if she was lifting an empty tray, "It must have been really hard for you to deal with them when she was little."

"It was frightening in the beginning. For example, when she started flying she would drop out of nowhere, as if she forgot how to do it for a second. I was sacred she would maybe fly across the window, break the glass and then fall all the way down from the building right over someone's head and kill them."

"That's... Specific." Kara's eyes widened in horror as she pictured that scene on her head, "And terrifying."

"I'm sorry. Ever since I became a mother I just can't stop picturing worst case scenarios."

"Yet you managed to do a lot on your own."

"Well, not totally on my own. I had Jess, who would always watch Ellie for me or help me with anything else I needed. Although once, when Ellie was three, she lifted Jess by her hand and flew with her across the house, so fast she knocked off many things from the shelves. Jess then called me desperate like the babysitter from that movie we watched together once.... The Incredibles" Kara almost laughed aloud, but she did her best to muffle her laughing with her hands, "There was also Jack, who was with me since I found out about the pregnancy. He was there during the labor too, and almost all the time while Ellie was an infant because we didn't know what to expect. So that makes it two people who I've told your secret to, I apologize if I couldn't."

"No, It's okay, I don't see how you could've not told them." Kara assured her. She spent a few seconds in silence, pondering over whether or not she should ask Lena something she was curious about. She decided to ask it anyways, "What does Jack think about moving back?"

"He totally supports it. He had seen my struggle to have the guts to tell you the truth, so he's happy I finally managed... With a little help from Ellie, of course."

"That's great. Really. Really great. When... When is he going?"

"Going where?" Lena furrowed eyebrows, confused at the questions and also confused at Kara's sudden interest in Jack.

"To National City."

"Why would he go?" 

"Well I thought... You two..."

"What? No, we're not back together if that's what you're thinking, He's my friend, I love him, but not like that."

"Oh. I'm sorry. For assuming." Kara apologized, embarrassed.

"That's alright." Lena shook her head, panicking on the inside at the thought that Kara cared if she was in a relationship or not, "Maybe we should sleep. Ellie is going to demand a lot from us tomorrow."

"Yeah, right, you're right. Goodnight, Lena."

"Goodnight, Kara."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who changed their username again, thats right, me! (this time i changed to match my twitter, I was told I should do that)  
> I'm also sorry this update took longer than the other ones


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, kara knows they need to talk and lena hates the game of life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BEWARE THE RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF FLUFF YOU'RE ABOUT TO WITNESS

And, in the next morning, Kara saw herself watching them sleep. 

She woke up with the sun rising. The birds were singing as they flew around the trees that surrounded the house, she could feel the smell of the sea and hear the waves as they collided against the rocks and the sand. The first thing she saw as soon as her eyes opened was Lena's face, peaceful as she slept, her head resting against Ellie's, who had some strands of hair over her face, her hand still over Kara's waist. 

Kara couldn't help but smile. After a few minutes of just looking at them and wishing she could wake up to that every morning, she heard the front door being opened and decided to get up from the bed to give Eliza a good morning. She managed to take Ellie's hand away from her body and put it over a pillow, so she wouldn't feel like anything was missing. She levitated so she wouldn't make any noises with the weight of her body leaving the bed. She used to do that whenever she needed to wake up before Lena did and wanted to keep her in her deep sleep. 

She only touched the floor when she was out of the room, walking downstairs as quietly as she could. Ruby wasn't in the couch anymore, so Kara figured she went to sleep with her mothers too, just like Ellie did. She saw Eliza's bag over the coffee table and found her boiling water on the kitchen. She turned towards Kara with tired eyes, but smiled at her.

"Good morning, sweetie. You're up early."

"Good morning, Eliza. How was work?" She asked as she sat on one of the stools. Eliza put a mug in front of her, assuming that she would want coffee as well.

"We had a calm night, actually. Mostly caring for patients who were already there with us. How did you sleep?"

"Great." Kara smiled again to herself as she remembered the scene she woke up to.

"I was thinking about making the office into a bedroom. The family is officially too big for this house and I can't have that."

"Are you sure?" Kara asked as she watched Eliza filling their mugs with coffee. Eliza didn't really use that office and she had been delaying making any changes to that room because of Jeremiah.

"Yes. I mostly do things in my laptop while laying on my bed so it's fine."

"I mean... Jeremiah's things."

"I guess It's time to let go. Right?"

"Right." Kara nodded and put her arm around Eliza's shoulders, hugging her from the side.

"And how does it feel? Being a mother now?"

"Oh, Rao. It's terrifying." Kara nervously laughed, "I was so insecure about it at first, and then I made so many mistakes with Ellie.... But I just already love that little girl so much. And she calls me mommy now. She used to call me Kara and now I'm mommy, that must mean that I did something right."

"Kara, she loves you."

"You think?"

"Of course. I can see in her eyes how much you mean to her." Eliza assured her and Kara sighed, happy that her daughter actually liked her, that she wasn't a disappointment as she feared she would be, "How was it? Talking to Lena again after so long?"

"Well... It was... Delicate. But we settled things down without any arguments." Kara told her, but she knew that Eliza was looking for a more complex answer. She flew to Midvale one night after having a hard day and cried on her lap as she let out all of her feelings. She could have talked to Alex, but she knew her sister would be biased so she looked for someone who would actually listen. Her mother, "We didn't talk about us, though. I wanted to, but I didn't know where to begin."

"You'll be spending a lot of time together now, so you should start preparing yourself for this conversation. Eventually, the tension will be just unbearable."

"What if I tell her that I still love her, tell her about all the times I almost flew to Metropolis to ask for forgiveness, and she says she just doesn't love me anymore?" Kara whispered. She had those times where she just wanted to drop everything and go after Lena, but she felt like she had no right. She was the one who broke up in the first place, so how could she just drop by and say "hey, I thought more about it and I guess we should go back together, sorry for the inconvenience".

"I told Lena yesterday that it was not my place to talk about your relationship, but you're my daughter so I'll just say it: What you two had was really strong, solid. You two were always unconsciously reaching for each other, always touching somehow, as if it made you two feel safer. The way you looked at her, as if she was your whole world and she was always smiling at you regardless of what you were doing. I'm old enough to know that love can end, yes, but yours hasn't. She was still smiling as she looked at you on the beach with Ellie, you were still looking at her as if she was the only person in the room as she talked during dinner last night. I know a lot happened but, please, just talk. See this as your second chance."

Kara absorbed those words slightly shocked at how much attention Eliza was paying to her and Lena, but she was right. It was her second chance and she would take it. 

She just didn't know when yet. 

"Good morning you two." Alex greeted them with sleepy eyes as she walked towards the kitchen.

"Fell off the bed?" Eliza joked at her daughter's grumpy face.

"Almost. Ruby isn't small anymore to sleep with me and Sam, but she doesn't seem to realize that." Alex sighed while she opened the fridge, looking for some milk, "I can wake them up if you want to sleep, mom."

"Oh, no, I'll keep myself awake at least until 7, I don't have a night shift again in a few weeks so I have to reorganize my sleep schedule." Eliza told her, "Did you make any plans for today?"

"Ruby was telling me she wanted to watch a hockey game in a nearby town. If we leave in the afternoon we can watch the game and be back here by 11."

"What about you, Kara?"

"I haven't... Made any plans, actually."

"I could hang out with Ellie if you want to talk to Lena." Eliza offered.

"Talk to Lena?" Alex arched an eyebrow at Kara, who pressed her lips, afraid that Alex would judge her even though she had resolved her matters with Lena the day before. 

"I should talk to her, you know. About us."

"You didn't talk about it?" Alex seemed surprised, "I thought you did. I mean, I walked by the bedroom in the middle of the night and saw you three sleeping together."

"We only did that because Ellie asked."

"Makes more sense." Alex nodded as she thought a little more on the subject, they wouldn't just get back together like magic after eight years apart and all that mess regarding their daughter.

"And I'm not going to propose we go straight back to dating like that, it's crazy, I just... Maybe start over? Start over sounds okay. I mean, I know that I still love her and I don't want to rush into things but I also don't want to pretend there's anything else. I know I've only seen her like, two days ago after 8 years apart and-"

"Kara. Breathe." Alex squeezed her sister shoulder as she gave her a reassuring smile. Kara followed her suggestion and breathed in and out a few times, "Listen, it is kind of soon, yes, but if you love her then you should tell her. You're both adults and have a daughter now, so you two shouldn't have any pending matters, or this relationship is going to be hard."

"I agree with your sister. Dialog and honesty is important." Eliza said and caressed Kara's golden hair. Kara was still nervous about everything and had no idea how she would approach Lena with that subject without pressuring her or scarring her away. So maybe she should wait a few days, at least until Lena was settled at National City again and was a little bit more used to having Kara around again. Nonetheless, Kara was also happy she had her family to support her, always.

"I'll talk to her. Just not today." Kara settled on that and her mother and her sister nodded, "Alex, do we still have those tents? I think I'm going to sleep outside with Ellie, like camping, she'll like that. It's also a good way to solve the beds problem, at least for tonight." 

"I think we do. I'll look for them at the garage later.

"Thanks."

"We should get breakfast ready. There are two aliens and a teenager in this house, they'll be hungry." Eliza told them, instantly lightening the mood, "Kara, what about you make some pancakes while I take a shower? Alex, take care of the juice."

"Sure." Kara started look for the necessary ingredients, "Ellie made me pancakes one morning, she made a huge mess in my kitchen but oh boy, those pancakes... So good."

"It's impressive how much she knows about food." Eliza commented, "She talked to me about the chicken yesterday and I felt like an amateur."

"I guess we all are amateurs if compared to her." Kara laughed.

"Then you should wake her up so she can make the pancakes herself, because if it's you the one who's cooking, change it to scrambled eggs, please."

"Do you have something against my pancakes?" Kara arched an eyebrow and Alex gave her a teasing look. Kara's hearing picked up Ellie mumbling something to Lena upstairs, "Lucky you, she's up."

"Thank God." Alex teased her and Kara punched her arm with no strength. Seconds later, Ellie was in the kitchen, followed by Lena. 

"Good morning!" Ellie greeted them all with excitement and Lena did it too, just a little less excited and way more sleepy.

"Good morning, little girl. Sleep well?"

"Yeah. But I'm hungry."

"As expected." Eliza laughed, "I was told you're the best cook in this house. Care to make us some pancakes?"

"Um... Eliza... Ellie is a little bit... Messy." Lena warned. 

"That's alright."

"What I mean is that she'll destroy your kitchen." She warned again and Ellie gave her a hurt look.

"Not if we help. As she cooks, we clean. How about that? The Super Kitchen Team." Kara suggested and both Lena's and Ellie's face brightened with the widest smile. 

"Okay. Let's do this. No, wait, not without my chef's hat." Ellie flew away from the kitchen, getting back to it a few moments later, this time wearing the hat. Lena furrowed eyebrows, probably asking herself where Ellie got that, but had a smile on her face as she watched her daughter going towards the kitchen sink, levitating a few centimeters so she could reach it and wash her hand, "Now I'm ready!"

Kara's idea actually was successful, and they were able to contain the mess Ellie left behind as she cooked their breakfast. When everything was ready, Ruby and Sam were finally up and they all had breakfast together. Eliza was fascinated by Ellie's talents and they spent the rest of the morning planning and then preparing what they would do for lunch together. While they did that, Kara was gathering everything she needed for the camp and Lena was busy in her phone during the whole time, getting a few work things done as well as monitoring how the moving and the remodeling of her apartment was going. 

By the end of the afternoon, after Alex, Sam and Ruby left for the game, the rest of them were in the middle of a The Game of Life match and Eliza had reached the maximum amount of time she could handle awake and kissed everyone goodnight before going to her bedroom upstairs. Kara took Eliza's car from the game board and put it back in the box. If she didn't leave, she would very likely win it, judging by the amount of 100.000 dollars bills she had. 

"I can't believe I lost my job again, this game is outrageous." Lena rolled her eyes as she took a new career card, "Games should not be based purely on luck, academically speaking, luck is a mechanic, but it needs to be balanced with skill, and that's what this game lacks. It forces me to spin the wheel and then it throws me a series of bad numbers that make me lose my job three times and still go to a vacation on a resort with my four children and pay 10 thousand dollars for each."

"I really want to know why do you know academic things about games." Kara laughed at her rant.

"Well, after our first game night I did some research... And read two or three books about how games are supposed to work." Lena confessed and Kara widened her blue eyes, surprised Lena would go that far for something so trivial, "Come on, don't judge me. I'm a nerd, you know that."

"Yeah, I know." Kara smiled at her, her eyes glowing as she watched Lena cheeks flushed, "But aren't all the games like that?"

"Of course not. For example, UNO, you pick cards from a mount, that is totally random, but there's management and strategy."

"There is strategy in Life too, you chose to go to college while mommy and I started working right away and make money and now you are poor." Ellie told her and Kara laughed aloud at her logic. 

"Young lady I hope you don't really believe that when you're 18." Lena laughed too, "And Kara, you owe me 10 thousand for this 10 you just got at the wheel."

"Shit."

"No bad words!" Ellie reprehended. 

"Do you have a swear jar or something?" Kara asked.

"She has more like a safe. All that money wouldn't fit in a jar." Lena pressed her lips, seemingly ashamed of herself for swearing too much, "And I only recently found out that I should have put in like, a dollar, not fifty, so I might as well pay for her college tuition with all of that."

Kara started laughing again and so did Lena. Ellie was watching them with a satisfied smile on her face. She enjoyed the time she spent with Kara, and with Lena, but it was the first time she was hanging out with both of them and it quickly became her favorite thing. The game went on and Kara was the first one to reach the retirement area. However, it was Ellie who ended up having the biggest amount of money, so she was the winner.

"Okay, little girl, I have a surprise for you: We're camping tonight."

"We are?" Ellie's eyes went wide and she jumped from the floor, "We are? sleeping in a tent in the forest and eating marshmallows and telling stories around the fire?"

"We can do all of that, yes. Except for the forest part, we'll have to stay here on the backyard, but it will be like camping on the beach, which is cool too."

"Yes! I love you!" She threw herself over Kara and hugged her neck. Kara gasped at her strength, but smiled as she held her daughter tight against her chest.

"I love you too." Her eyes met Lena's, who observed them with a genuine smile on her face. Kara felt like she was about to cry, so she let go of Ellie, "Now, come on, we have to get everything ready."

"Okay!" She nodded enthusiastically, "Mom! Let's go! We're camping!"

"What? No, you two are camping, I'm going to sleep in Alex's perfectly comfortable bed." Lena shook her head and Ellie pouted. Kara had mentioned to Lena that she intended to camp with Ellie, she didn't directly invite Lena, but she didn't let her out either. Her words were something like "what do you think about camping tonight?" and Lena answered with "amazing idea, Ellie will love it.", so it was kind of open. 

"Please mom! Pretty please?"

"El, I don't have a back of steel like you and Kara. I really don't want to sleep on the floor."

"It's not on the floor, it's on a blanket. Please, I'll let you have the fluffiest one." Ellie was still pouting as she stared at Lena with begging blue eyes. Lena was staring back, trying her best to win the silent battle but, eventually, she sighed, defeated. 

"Alright." She gave in and Ellie smiled, satisfied. Kara tried to hide, but she was as satisfied as Ellie with the fact that Lena would join them. She loved the last few hours she spent with both of them, and she wanted every extra second she could possibly get. 

”Great, I'll get the tents, you get the blankets and- And she's gone." Kara slightly laughed when Ellie flew away from the living room before she finished her sentence. 

"Kara, I'm sorry if you wanted this to be something between the two of you." Lena apologized with guilty eyes, "She's clingy with me, but that's totally my fault."

"What? No! I'm happy you'll be with us." Kara let out preparing herself to rephrase that but, even though she wasn't planning on having the conversation about her feelings with Lena anytime soon, there was nothing wrong with dropping hints right?, "I mean... Actually, yeah, I meant just that."

Lena's green eyes slightly widened at Kara's words. Kara also picked up a significant raise in the pace of her heartbeat.

"I'm back!" Ellie announced, throwing the many mattresses over the couch. 

"Wow. You brought every single blanket you found." Kara smiled, "But that's okay, we'll be able to make a great bed for your mom's not-made-of-steel-back."

"Ha. You're so funny." Lena rolled her eyes, but the smile was still on her face as much as she tried to look annoyed. 

They took everything they needed outside to start putting their camp together. Kara took care of the tent with Ellie while Lena gathered a few wood logs that were in a corner of the backyard. Kara made sure to prepare the most comfortable bed she could make with those blankets and a few pillows, Lena pulled the beach chairs down from the deck and put them around where the fire was going to be set. When they were all finished, it actually looked very cozy. 

Kara used her laser vision to put the logs on fire and she sat on one of the beach chairs. Ellie sat on her lap, resting her body over Kara's and Lena sat on the one across from them, she had the only blanket left around her body, the night was starting to get chilly, but hopefully the fire would help with that.

"That's a whole lot of marshmallows." Lena observed when she saw the three packages by Kara's side.

"Well, Alex and I love it, here is the only place where we can actually put them on fire, also I'm kryptonian, so..." Kara explained as she put the marshmallows on a stick.

"That seems to be the explanation for everything."

"Too bad I can only use this excuse with a select number of people."

"I always used my laser vision to heat marshmallows." Ellie told her.

"I did that too, but somehow it takes some of the sweetness away and it doesn't get as melted as it should on the inside." Kara explained, giving her some of the marshmallows that were ready for her to try. Ellie widened her eyes in surprise.

"You're right. With fire is way better." Ellie nodded as she ate the rest, "Okay, story time now! But no scary stories, I found out I don't like them. You go first, mom."

"I don't really know any stories except the ones we read together." Lena told her.

"Then tell some story that you lived! Mommy told me you have a brother, tell a story about him."

Lena's eyes were on Kara's, who widened hers in fear. She should have known that one way or another Lena would find out.

"I'm sorry, I let it slip but I didn't say anything else." She apologized immediately, "Actually I also said that he died, but that was all, I swear-"

"It's fine." Lena cut her off, her tone was stiff.

"Maybe I can start, I have dozens of stories" Kara suggested, trying to make things better.

"No, I actually have one." Lena said, for Kara's surprise, she was actually willing to share something about Lex, "I was about five, six years old, and I wanted to run away from the Luthor manor. My father was in a business trip and my mother had put me in time out for something absurd that I no longer remember. So I went to my room and put some clothes inside my backpack, the only thing I still had from my biological mother was that backpack, and Lilian had tried to throw it away three times but I always ended up taking it back."

"That's mean." Ellie commented as she ate her second stick of marshmallows. Lena was still holding her first one.

"Yeah. When I was about to leave, my brother caught me. He asked me where I was going and I told him, and he said he would come with me. He didn't even take anything, he just grabbed my hand and we walked towards the forest. I think we only walked for five minutes, It had rained during the day so there was a lot of mud and our feet kept getting stuck. So Lex stopped walking and he said that we should make something that would allow us to go faster and without getting our shoes dirty, and after we did that we would try to run away again. So we started working on something like a hover board, it took three years to get it ready, that project was actually what got me into science in the first place. But, the point is, that Lex used that so I wouldn't run away at all. He wanted me to stay."

"Mom, why did your brother die?" Ellie asked. Kara was listening closely, that story was actually new to her too. 

"My brother was a bad man. I guess... He got what was coming to him. Unfortunately."

"But he was nice to you."

"Only to me. And only sometimes." Lena explained, "Kara, you're on."

"Okay." Kara nodded, part of her feeling sorry Lena had to revisit her memories about Lex, but another part grateful that she finally talked about him again, maybe she needed to. 

"Tell a story about you and mom." Ellie asked. Kara's eyes met Lena's again, but she was just observing, waiting to see what Kara would come up with.

"Right. A story about me and mom. Your mom. Okay.... Let me see... There was this one time that we were here in Midvale and there was a carnival."

"I never went to a carnival." Ellie told her.

"We will fix that, don't worry. But, anyway, I suggested to Lena that we could go, and she told me the same thing, that she never went to one, so the suggestion became an order and we went. We played many games there, and I confess I cheated on one so I could get her a huge stuffed penguin."

"Liar! You told me you didn't use your powers to hit that can." Lena was shocked at that information.

"I wanted to impress you!"

"Darling, back then you had just told me you could literally fly I don't think I could be any more impressed." Lena told her while laughing and Kara's heart skipped a beat when she herad Lena referring to her as "darling" once again, but Lena didn't even seem to notice that she did that. 

"Wait, you got mom Mr. Red Scarf?" Ellie questioned.

"You still have it?" Kara asked Lena with surprise on her eyes. Lena's cheeks were red as she nodded. 

"She does and she never lets me touch it." Ellie complained.

"Come on, El, you can have every single stuffed animal on earth but that one is mine." 

"See?" Ellie pointed at Lena and Kara laughed loudly. She was so happy Lena actually kept that small piece of their past. 

"Well, me, your mom, and Mr. Red Scarf went to the Ferris Wheel. When we were at the very top of if, your mom squeezed my arm so strongly that she broke her fingers. She was scared of heights and didn't want to tell me."

"Oh, mom! That must've hurt."

"Like hell."

"Tell me more." Ellie asked and Kara didn't take a fraction of second to think of another one. As she shared with Ellie a few fragments of their past, she remembered how incredible her life with Lena used to be. How she missed it. How she wanted it back. How she finally had a chance to actually live that life again.

As the stories moved on, Ellie's eyes struggled to keep themselves open, until they finally closed and she fell asleep. Kara got up from the chair gently, holding the little girl on her arms.

"I'm going to put her inside." Ellie whispered to Lena, who nodded, getting up to.

"Do you think we'll fit in there?" 

"If we squeeze."

"I'll go in first, then you put her, then you get in." Lena instructed and Kara nodded, following her towards the tent. Lena got inside, trying to occupy as less space as she possibly could. Kara carefully put Ellie by Lena's side and she pulled Ellie a little closer to her. Kara then got inside, closing the door after she was in. Lena slightly laughed when she looked at their situation, confined inside that small space just so they could make Ellie happy.

"The perks of motherhood." Lena whispered to Kara, who gave her a small smile.

"I wouldn't trade it for nothing."

"Me neither." Lena agreed, "Hey, Kara. Thank you, for this wonderful day. Ellie had a lot a fun. And... I had too."

"I had the best time too." 

"Goodnight, Kara."

"Goodnight, Lena."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved writing this chapter, I hope you guys enjoy reading it too  
> next update might take a while though, because I'll be travelling for a few days
> 
> disclaimer: I took the opportunity to nerd over games i'm sorry but i had to (and I love the game of life(I usually have more luck than lena had))


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, kara has problems with salt

Kara greeted Lena with a wide smile when she opened her apartment's door for her. 

She tried to smile back at Kara but before she could she started coughing, covering her mouth with a handkerchief.

"I'm sorry." She apologized and gesticulated for Kara to go inside. Kara furrowed eyebrows, studying Lena's face. Her nose was red, she was pale and had dark circles under her eyes, visibly sick.

"What happened? You look terrible."

"Thanks a lot." Lena laughed as she closed the door behind them, "It must have been the weather when we slept outside." 

"Oh, I'm really sorry. It got really cold at night, we should've thought of that."

"It's alright, It was worth it." Lena waved away her apology before she started coughing again. 

"You're not thinking about going to work like this, right?" Kara asked her, worry in her eyes as she stared at Lena. She was at her apartment to pick Ellie up so they could go to the carnival, since she never went to one and she would most likely love it. Lena was supposed to go with them, but she had a lot of work to do with her company reopening happening by the end of that week. Kara suggested they could go on another day, but Lena insisted she didn't want to spoil the fun.

"I have no choice, Kara. I have a lot of things that I have to take care right now-"

"Mommy!" Ellie's excited voice called their attention towards the hallway, from where Ellie ran towards them and hugged Kara tightly. 

"Hey, little girl! You're so pretty today." Kara complimented her daughter, who had a carefully made crown braid in her hair and wore a baby pink dress over a grey long sleeved tee. Lena was probably the one who did her hair and Kara asked herself where did she learn to do that so well. 

"Thank you, you look very pretty too." Ellie smiled at her, "Do you want to see my new bedroom?!"

"Oh, sure." Kara nodded and Ellie pulled her towards the hallway, excited to show Kara how her new bedroom looked like. Lena followed them closely, a small amused smile on her face as she walked behind them.

They stopped at the third door to the right, that was already open when they got there, and Kara's eyes widened while she studied her surroundings. The walls were pastel blue, except for the one where the bed was placed in front of, which was in a very light shade of grey. One of the walls was entirely occupied by shelves, that kept her many toys and a few books in a chaotic way, Lena probably had Ellie put away her toys after playing with them and she did it her own way. On the floor, over a fluffy rug, there was an enormous doll house filled with small furniture, dolls, and a few monster trucks around them totally out of context. 

But what caught Kara's eyes before everything else was the House Of El coat of arms above Ellie's bed that emitted a dim blue light, the same color as the rest of the walls. She held back tears as she bit her lip. The colors, the symbol above where she slept as if it protected her, it made Kara feel for a second that she was back at Krypton. She then looked at the framed pictures that were by the bed's side over a nightstand, not expecting to see a picture of her among all the ones that had Ellie and Lena.

"I took it when you weren't looking." Lena explained after she followed Kara's eyes. The pictured showed Kara and Ellie, two days ago when they were playing board games at Eliza's place. They were both laughing while leaning over the board, and Kara's mind went straight back to that moment where she actually caught Lena with her phone in her hands and told her to put it away. 

"Thank you." Kara smiled at Lena, who smiled right back at her, "Ellie, your room looks amazing."

"A little bit messy though." Lena complained and Ellie gave her an exhausted look.

"I put everything back on the shelves! Almost everything..." She defended herself, but her eyes were guilty as she looked around and detected all of the toys that she left behind, "Can I put the rest away when I come back, please?"

"Of course." Lena nodded, coughing again right after, this time way more rough than before. 

"Lena, you should really rest." Kara unconsciously put her palm against Lena's forehead, who slightly bolted with the sudden contact. Kara grimaced when she felt Lena's skin against her palm warmer than it should be, "Pretty sure you have a fever."

"Kara, it's okay. It's just a cold, I'll survive." Lena put her hand away and walked back towards the living room. 

"You're not going to get any better without rest and proper fluids." Kara told her as she followed Lena. Her blue eyes were evaluating the brunette while they walked, she felt her heart pounding as she considered the idea on her mind. She had to take care of Lena, right? She was clearly sick and most certainly would just ignore that fact and do business as usual, but, if Kara stayed and watched over her, she would take care of herself, actually Kara would take care of her, either way, she was staying, "Which I'll provide for you."

"What? Kara-"

"I don't want you to get any worse and I know you're going to work as hard as you always do regardless of how you're feeling."

"You don't have to do this because, like I said, it's just a cold."

"I think she's right, mom. You don't look well." Ellie gave her take and Lena looked at her with furrowed eyebrows.

"Oh, so it's you two against me now?"

"Yep. So you democratically lost. Now, go lay down on the couch." Kara demanded with her arms crossed in front of her chest. Ellie had the same pose, and Lena couldn't help but laugh at them before following the instructions. 

"I'll stay here taking care of your mom, but you can still go if you want, Ruby and Sam will be with you. Is that okay?" 

"Okay!" Ellie nodded. Kara expected her to be disappointed, but she looked actually even happier for some reason. She ran towards Lena on the couch and kissed her cheek, "Bye, mom, I hope you feel better."

"Have fun, El. I love you."

Kara took Ellie to the car and kissed her goodbye before walking back to Lena's apartment. When she was inside again, Lena was sneezing against the handkerchief and had her computer on her lap, displaying her email inbox. 

"Hey! No work!" Kara scolded her. 

"Come on, I'm resting, but with my laptop. Isn't that allowed?"

"No."

Lena sighed and rolled her eyes, but closed her laptop and put it on the coffee table in front of her. She then started rubbing her arms, trying to warm them up somehow.

"Are you cold?" Kara asked even though the answer was obvious. Lena was wearing a sweater that looked perfectly warm, specially for the weather on that day so, if she was still cold, she definitely had a fever. 

"A little bit."

"Where can I find a blanket?"

"Same place they used to be." Lena quickly told her, and Kara furrowed eyebrows, she couldn't even remember the last time she had been to Lena's apartment before the breakup, so she obviously didn't remember where anything was anymore, "I'm sorry. There are some folded in one of the bottom shelves inside my closet."

"Okay. I'll be right back." Kara disappeared in a flash and came back in another one. Lena pressed her lips, she wasn't really used to seeing Kara using her powers, she did it sometimes when they were together, but back then Kara was still devoted to the idea of being as human as she could be, so she hardly ever used them. 

She was ready to be handed the blanket, but Kara carefully unfolded it and put it over Lena's shoulders instead. Lena thanked her before Kara headed towards the kitchen, Lena's cheeks feeling even warmer than they already were. 

"I'll make you a chicken soup. Do you think you have the ingredients?" Kara asked, she didn't exactly have to scream since there weren't any walls between the living room and the kitchen, but speaking loudly was necessary. 

"Probably. I live with Ellie, remember? I must have every possible edible thing you can think of." Lena laughed.

"I don't think I have ever seen you sick before." Kara told her as she looked for everything she needed in those cabinets, that were almost overflowing with food, so Lena wasn't exaggerating at all. 

"I don't really have a low immunology system, so that's new." Lena confessed, "Are you sure you want to do this? I'm really fine, I mean I'll be fine."

"You're not getting rid of me." Kara hummed from the kitchen as she separated the ingredients she would use. 

"Shit." Lena joked, but she was happy that Kara cared about her enough to cancel her plans and stay with her and make sure she would be okay. Even though she was happy, there was also that part of her that would always haunt her like a shadow, that part that questioned if she really deserved it, if she deserved any kind of affection coming from Kara. She tried to push the shadow away, "Just a question, did you get any better at cooking after these years?"

"Why doesn't anyone like my food?" Kara whined, the memory of Alex mocking her over pancakes a couple of days before sparkling in her mind. 

"Well... It's just not your strong suit. It isn't mine either, I can't remember the last time I tried to cook and it ended well, maybe that's why we were given a prodigy as a child."

"Makes sense. Lucky us." Kara laughed, "Unfortunately, all you have today is me."

"Sounds more than enough." Lena told her with a small smile and Kara smiled too, biting her underlip as she faced the ingredients in front of her, carrots, onions, the chicken of course, she didn't really remember step by step how to make that soup, she had seen Eliza preparing some for Alex once or twice, so she decided to go for the obvious. While she prepared the ingredients, she peaked at Lena above her shoulder to see what she was doing. At first, she turned on the TV in a very low volume, it was on a kids channel, probably because Ellie had been watching before, but Lena didn't bother changing it, she just settled at whatever that cartoon was and lie down on the couch, resting her head on a couple of pillows, finally giving in to the tiredness she was feeling. 

While Kara was cutting the vegetables, her phone vibrated on the kitchen counter and she was delighted by the notification she got from Sam, the miniature of the picture giving away it was a picture of Ellie warmed Kara's heart even before she actually opened it. Her little girl had a wide smile on her face while she held one stick of cotton candy in each hand. Kara texted back dozens of heart emojis and locked her phone again, cooking with a smile on her face from that moment on. 

It was about one hour later when Kara was all done with the soup, Lena had already fallen asleep. Her body was resting over the couch, her hands pending down as her chest slowly moved up and down. Kara put the bowl of soup on the coffee table as gently as she could, the glass barely making any noise as it collided with the surface. She walked towards the bathroom, getting a little lost in the hallway with so many doors on it, Kara was pretty sure there were places on Lena's apartment she had never been to. She looked in the cabinets for something that could bring Lena's fever down. 

She returned to the living room with pills and a cup of water. Kara thought about just letting her sleep, but she needed to get at least some food in her system, she could sleep more later, so she touched Lena's shoulder and her green eyes blinked a few times, as if she was trying to find herself for a moment, but she relaxed when she looked at Kara, who watched her with a pitiful smile on her face.

"How are you feeling?" Kara whispered.

"Dreadful."

"I'm all finished with the soup." Kara showed her the bowl where she had put it. 

"Thank you, but I don't think I can eat anything right now."

"You have to try, you haven't eaten anything all day."

"Please, Kara, I'm tired." Lena mumbled, her eyes closing again and she didn't seem to realize that.

"I know, but It will just take a few minutes." Kara insisted, "I can give it to you if you want."

"No. It's okay." Lena sighed, forcing herself to sit back on the couch. For some reason, her whole body hurt as if her bones were being pressured by her own blood. Her throat felt dry and her head was pulsating, she definitely felt way worse than before she fell asleep, as if laying down gave her sickness a chance take over her. 

"Alright." Kara put the bowl on Lena's hands, watching as Lena put a full spoon inside her mouth. She slightly grimaced, but quickly scooped some more soup and stuffed into her mouth. That, however, wasn't able to hide the obvious from Kara. 

"It's awful, isn't it?" Kara asked, even though she already knew the answer. 

"No, It's not awful-"

"Let me taste it." Kara took the spoon from Lena's hand and tasted the soup, barely feeling something other than salt on her tongue, "Holy Rao. It its awful."

"Don't be so hard on yourself, it's your intention that counts." Lena offered her a small smile as Kara pushed the bowl away. 

"No, not when you needed the nutrients." Kara sighed, feeling useless, until she thought of something else she could do to help, disappearing in a blur. When she returned she had a wet face towel on her hands. She slowly approached Lena, as if asking for permission to touch her. When Lena didn't say anything against it, she held the towel over Lena's forehead and she felt an instant relief, that unfortunately didn't last long since the heat in her body took over the coldness from the towel in a matter of seconds, "Shit, I forgot to bring the water-"

"Kara. Wait." Lena held her by her arm when she was about to leave again.

"What's wrong?"

"Why are you doing this?"

"What?"

"You know what. Being here. Taking care of me. You don't have to."

"I..." She hesitated, not ever doubting her feelings, but unsure if that was actually the most appropriate time for her to come clean about her feelings, "I care about you, Lena."

"I know. I just don't know how. I mean, after everything I did I thought that your forgiveness was pretty much everything I would get." And Lena was smiling as she said that, a smile as sad as her green eyes as she stared at Kara, "You're not real. You can't be." 

"What do you mean?"

"I don't deserve this. Any of this. Yet you're still here."

"You deserve everything." Kara shook her head in denial, "I wish you could see you the way I see."

"What do you see?"

Kara pressed her lips, losing herself in the depth of Lena's green eyes so close to hers.

"I see the woman I love under layers of insecurities and guilt. What will it take for you to understand that it was not all your fault? That you did the best you could? And that I understand the choices you made and don't blame you for them?"

"Kara...." Lena's heart skipped a beat. The woman I love. Which meant Kara still loved her. 

"Do you hate me?" Kara's eyes went down to the floor as she asked that, "For telling you to leave when you needed me the most?"

Because Kara most certainly hated herself for that, for pushing her away days after the most traumatic experience of her life, making Lena lose so much at the same time. 

"No. I couldn't.... I can't." Lena confessed, hating Kara was one of the few things that Lena saw as an impossible task, "But... You said..."

"This is not how I wanted this to go." Kara snorted, frustrated by how she ended up telling Lena she still loved her. She wanted to be a special moment, where she would ask Lena out to dinner or lunch and they would sit together to talk, just like a date, but no, it had to happen while Lena was burning in fever and struggling to keep herself awake, "I'm sorry. I think we should... Talk about it later, when you feel better. Okay?"

"Okay." Lena agreed. She wanted to say that she still loved Kara too, but Kara looked so distraught at the conversation they just had that she thought she should keep it to herself, at least until Kara was ready to talk again. Kara cleared her throat and offered Lena a pill.

"It should bring your fever down."

"Thank you. Really."

"Anytime." 

"How about you sleep a little more?" Kara suggested, in part because she knew Lena needed some more rest but also because she couldn't bear the tension between them. 

"That's probably a good idea." Lena nodded, getting up from the couch, "I'll go to bed. Thanks again, Kara."

Kara just nodded as she watched Lena walking towards her bedroom. She sat on the couch, spreading herself over it as she tried to relax, but her muscles felt as hard as stones. She then decided to do something to occupy her mind and went to the kitchen to clean everything up and get rid of the poisonous salty soup she had made. When she was all finished with that, she went to Ellie's room since she remembered Lena was complaining about her mess. Kara put the toys away where she thought they probably belonged and snooped around a little, getting a closer look at Ellie's things. She had a bunch of all kinds of toys, she was apparently that kind of child who didn't really care about what the toy was as long as it interested her in any way. Her books were mostly children stories, fairy tales, a whole section of cooking books and some comics. Kara couldn't help but smile when she found some Supergirl issues among the other comics. She never really read any Supergirl comics, so it was an opportunity to do something new. She carried some of them with her to the living room and started reading them, laughing with herself sometimes with the inaccuracy or sensationalism of facts, but she mostly enjoyed herself. 

Eventually, her attention turned towards the front door, that was being opened. Kara lifted her head and suddenly Ellie flew towards the couch, her small hands holding a stuffed giraffe that was almost her size, just the sight of her made Kara's face lighten up with a smile.

"Hey, little girl. Are you okay? Did you have fun?" She asked her daughter as she sat on her lap, she smelled like sugar and chocolate. 

"Yeah! Carnival is amazing!" She slightly jumped with excitement and Kara's smile grew into a grin, "I played all the games and got this huge giraffe as a prize and ate a lot of things I've never eaten before. Like caramel apples." 

"Did you like it?"

"It tastes... Different. I'm not sure if I like it or not yet." Ellie's eyebrows were furrowed as she probably analyzed the taste, but then she just shrugged, settling down on her indecision for now, "Why are you reading Supergirl comics?" Her eyebrows furrowed as she looked at the comics that were over the coffee table, she seemed to only have noticed them on that moment. 

"I found them in your room and I got curious. Hope that's okay."

"Do you like them? Did any of this really happen?"

"I do like them and... Well... Some did, like that fight against Red Tornado and Metallo, also Livewire, but.... It didn't happen exactly as it is here." Kara winked and Ellie looked at her with expectancy, probably waiting for her to develop on that, telling her how it really happened, "I'll tell you some other time, because now I need your help."

"With what?"

"You mom really needs to eat something and I tried to make her a soup but... It turned out like I made a bowl of salt with chicken on it."

Ellie laughed aloud and Kara flustered with embarrassment, but laughed too. 

"Okay, I'll help you, but where is mom?"

"She's sleeping." 

"Is she better?"

"Not really. But she will be, specially after she eats something." Kara squeezed Ellie's shoulder to tranquilize her, "Off we go?"

Ellie nodded and the two of them walked towards the kitchen. Ellie gathered the vegetables and what was left of the chicken and put them over the kitchen sink after she washed her hands. Kara thought it was adorable when she put her giraffe sitting over one of the counters in a way that it looked like it was watching them cook. 

"Salt is really important for food, but you have to be careful because it's a very strong ingredient and it will rather make things worse than better." Ellie explained, "Sometimes when I'm cooking I pretend I am a witch making a potion. Makes it easier to understand things."

"That's really smart of you." Kara praised her. Cooking was definitely an adult subject and certainly while Ellie was learning she found herself facing many subjects that were too hard to understand if she didn't make it ludic somehow, "But how can I assure things will have taste?"

"More seasoning, less salt. Chicken is kind of tasteless if you don't put anything on it, but look at how many vegetables we have! All of them have a taste, so we use them." Ellie told her, finishing off her sentence with a laugh that reminded Kara of witches from cartoons and laughed even more. Ellie was a true delight to be around. 

"Got it." Kara nodded, she was still amazed by how much she was learning from a little girl, it even felt weird to ask her questions, but she could see how happy Ellie got whenever people asked her for advice about food. 

"Can I ask you something?" Ellie started, her blue eyes looking down at the onions she was cutting. 

"Of course."

"Do you still love my mom?"

Kara's heart skipped a beat. She pressed her lips and blinked a few times, that question hit her harder than a truck,

"I... I do. I do." She nodded nervously as she answered with honesty. 

"Then why don't you get back together?" Ellie asked her with impatient eyes, "You could live here with us, and you two would be married like aunt Alex and aunt Sam."

"Well..." Kara took a deep breath, thinking about the best way to answer to that as she wished it was that simple, "We have been apart for a while. We need to sit down, talk about it."

"I know my mom loves you too."

"How?"

"I asked her."

"Oh." Kara snorted, not expecting her answer to be that simple. 

"I'm trying my best to bring you together but adults are hard." Ellie confessed and Kara stared back at her with confused blue eyes. 

"What do you mean?"

"I said I was scared of the movie that day but I wasn't, I convinced mom to camp with us, I let you two alone today as long as I could asking aunt Sam if I could go on everything twice but she had to go to work."

"Little girl..." Kara's eyes widened and her mouth was slightly open in disbelief. She was concerned with how easy was for Ellie to lie and how even easier it was for everyone else to believe in her. She took a self note to mention to Lena that they needed to talk to their daughter about it, but she wasn't really angry at Ellie, how could she be? It was Ellie pushing them together that created the best moments Kara had had in a while, "You're unbelievable."

"Are you going to tell her that you love her? Because if you do she'll tell you that she loves you too and you'll live happily ever after." Ellie looked at Kara with pleading blue eyes and Kara sighed, wishing once again that her talk with Lena had been different. 

"I will tell her."

"Promise?"

"I promise." She nodded. 

She couldn't promise a happily ever after, but she could promise to try.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one took a little longer with all this sh*t going on but i hope you enjoyed!


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, kara is reminded of what really matters

Ellie was mirroring Lena's movements as she put her makeup on in front of the mirror in her suite. At least, she tried to mirror them, because what she was mostly doing was sloppily applying the products on her face while standing on a little stool so she could be tall enough to see herself. When Lena was all finished, she looked at Ellie, even though she could see her through the mirror, and bit her underlip trying not to laugh, but gave in when Ellie herself started laughing at her own face. 

"You're way better at it than I am." She told Lena while she made silly faces that got even sillier with the blurred lipstick on her face and the eyeliner that she accidentally spilled on her cheek.

"Come on, let's clean your face." Lena called after she had stopped laughing. She gently held her daughter's chin while she used a wet wipe to clean away the makeup. Ellie always liked to play pretend while her mother got ready for events or parties.

"I wish I could go." Ellie complained and Lena sighed, exhausted to go through that again. For obvious reasons, she never took Ellie with her to parties. This time, she had already planned on making it public that she had a daughter, but she wanted the main focus to be the reopening of her company and the promises for the future, not Ellie. 

"Maybe on the next one, El." Lena told her tenderly, "Besides, you're not going to like this kind of event. It's boring."

"I can't know unless I've tried it." Ellie crossed her arms in front of her chest and Lena gave her a small laugh of amusement, she always found it funny when children used parent arguments to prove their points. 

"Okay, smarty pants, just not this time." Lena caressed her cheek when she was all finished cleaning her face, "Your aunt Sam is waiting for us, so can you put the snacks in a bag as I put on my shoes?"

"Alright." Ellie obeyed, flying towards the kitchen as Lena walked back into her room. It didn't take long for them to leave the building, Lena's driver was waiting for them outside and they made their first stop in front of Alex and Sam's house a few minutes later. They were going to have a movie night together, Alex and Brainy would join them later after the last few hours of their shift, but Nia and Kara were covering the event at Lcorp so they would be busy.

"Bye, baby. Behave, okay? I love you." Lena hugged her daughter tightly.

"I love you too. When are you coming back?"

"Not until later. But I'll be there when you wake up." She promised, and Ellie smiled widely before she kissed Lena's cheek and got out of the car. She didn't leave until she saw the door being opened and Ellie getting inside of the house safe and sound, waving at Ellie and Sam before telling her driver they were good to go. 

She missed the building they had in National City, it was significantly smaller but it felt more comfortable than the one in Metropolis, probably because the latter reminded her of Lex all the time, since she had been there with him while they worked together for years. 

She was there earlier than most of the staff, since she wanted some time to practice her speech. She was good at speaking in public, how could she not be after she had to do it so many times, but that speech was different. She was about to reopen the doors of her company and, as much as she was really good at hiding, she was scared of the backlash. She had worked really hard to get the company back on its feet after everything Lex had done, and people slowly gained her trust again. She got tired just to think about the amount of rumors people would create about her moving back to National City, she was also concerned with how she would be received by the people. But she had prepared the answers to most questions they could throw at her. 

Her phone started to ring when she reached the stage from where she would speak to the guests and the press. A small smile grew on her lips when she saw Kara's name on the screen. They didn't have a chance to get back to their conversation, Kara had actually asked Lena out to dinner after the party so they could finally have a proper conversation about their feelings, maybe that was also a factor on why Lena felt specially nervous on that night. 

"Hey, Kara, you're still coming tonight?" She asked her casually, trying her best to hide her nervousness. On the other hand, Kara sounded nothing other than nervous on the phone. 

"Wait, you're already there?" She gasped. 

"Yeah. I came one hour earlier to practice my speech and check everything- Kara?" Lena furrowed eyebrows when she noticed the line go dead all of a sudden. 

Lena bolted when she felt a hand covering her mouth as another hand gripped around her arm and strongly carried her towards the closest office on the room. As much as she tried to fight back, it was useless, and she was thrown inside the office regardless of all efforts. She tripped on her heels and fell against the cold floor as the man who grabbed her locked the door behind them. She lifted her head to get a better look at him, he wasn't covering his face, it was an average white man with curly brown hair and tired amber eyes, he was wearing the same uniform as the event servers were, probably that was how he entered without being noticed. His hand was trembling as he held what appeared to be a button. A red button. That could never be good. 

His face was red with anger and hatred as he looked at Lena, who slowly got up from the floor and carefully stepped backwards from him, who immediately pointed a gun at her. She lifted her arms in surrender and his finger moved towards the button.

"Wait!" She yelled. It was pretty obvious what that button did and Lena couldn't just watch that happen, "No, don't do it. I'm not alone in this building, there are other people here who are just doing their jobs."

"Your brother didn't seem to care about that when he exploded the Daily Planet!" He screamed, his eyes burning with tears. 

"If you're here to avenge my brother's actions, then you shouldn't do it like this, the same way he did. That only proves you're like him." She tried to reason with him. 

"I moved from Metropolis to start over with my girls after that psycho blew my wife up. And then you had to come too, to follow me. But this time, I'm not going to let any Luthor hurt my family." He hissed at her, who wanted to keep bargaining but couldn't find the words. He was there because of what Lex did. Once more, she was going to pay for his mistakes but, this time, would be the last time, "You're right. No one else needs to get hurt."

And Lena felt the pain almost immediately after she heard the bang, loud enough to make her deaf for a few seconds as she felt the strength of her legs dissolving and she fell on the  
floor, feeling it cold and hard against her back. Her hand instinctively covered her painful wound as she felt the blood ecapinh through her fingers. He was still pointing the gun at her, his finger ready to pull the trigger, but he hesitated when his eyes saw the blood coming out of Lena's stomach, slowly making a puddle of blood bellow her body. It was clearly a desperate measure. He used to be a good man, whose loss and grieve had driven him insane.

That was when the wall on their right broke into pieces as Supergirl flew inside the room. Lena's vision was blurry, but she could see her eyes glowing red as she looked at him. He kept pointing the gun at Lena, but he lifted the button so Supergirl could see. 

"Don't come any closer or I'll detonate all the bombs I've put in this building. I'll kill everyone." He threatened. Supergirl didn't answer him, she just kept staring with her glowing eyes and closed fists. Lena had never seen Kara that way before, so angry she didn't even move. 

"Supergirl... Listen... To him." She struggled to ask her as much as she was struggling to breathe and keep herself awake, but wasn't sure if she was even listening. But she was scared. Of Kara. Of what she could do to that man. Because, somehow, Lena pitied him. And, as much as she knew that Kara was good and would never kill unless she had no choice, that look in her eyes was different. Vicious. 

"Superman was the true hero who got rid of the threat, while you're here defending it." He spitted, "So what is going to be? Her? Or this whole building?"

Kara just kept staring at him. She didn't move a muscle. 

"That's what I thought." He said, before pulling the trigger again. The bullet was fast, but Kara was faster, and, in a single movement, she grabbed the bullet and punched his face with such strength that Lena was pretty sure broke his jaw before he landed abruptly against the wall. Kara was about to keep going for him, even though he was already unconscious, but Lena was able to grab her cape, using most of the strength she still had while she felt her blood slipping through her skin. 

"Supergirl.... Kara... Stop... Don't...." Lena tried, but the words felt heavy and she couldn't keep her grip on Kara's cape anymore, leaning a mark of blood behind. Lucky her, her voice calling Kara's name was enough to snap her out of whatever she was and she blinked multiple times before looking down at lena, falling on her knees by her side. 

"Lena." She gasped, her hands trembling with Lena's blood on them, "I've got you. You're okay."

Lena just nodded, her eyes closing against her will, but she felt Kara's arms picking her up from the floor before she gave in to the dark. 

And Kara bolted to the sky, holding Lena strongly against her chest as she flew across the town, to the nearest hospital she could think of. She landed on the emergency entrance and stumbled her way inside, Lena's body feeling heavier on her hands than the plane she once stopped from falling. She screamed for help even though her presence there called enough attention. In a matter of seconds, Lena was taken from her hands and the doctors carried her body away. Kara was still looking at her hands, red and sticky as she felt a hand touch her shoulder, probably a doctor or a nurse saying that they got it from there, that they would take care of her.

She forced herself to walk out from the emergency room, she couldn't be there as Supergirl or it would raise suspicion over her identity, but the world around her was completely out of focus. She couldn't get past the alley, resting her back on the brick wall as she tried to control her breathing.

Everything was fine. 

She was patrolling at the other side of the city, using her few free hours before she had to cover Lcorp's event to make sure the city was safe, when she intercepted a call received by a police officer that was walking out of a coffee shop just bellow where Kara was passing by. The female voice on the other side of the call reported that little girl called crying, telling them that her dad was going to do something bad to Lcorp. Kara stopped flying immediately, checking the time on her phone. Lena was probably still home, she still had over an hour before the event started. 

But Kara called. Just to check. 

And when she answered the phone, she told Kara she was already there. And Kara flew as fast as she could. But when she got there, it was almost too late. If she hat gotten there a minute sooner, Lena probably wouldn't even have gotten injured. But if she got there a minute later, she would be dead. And all she wanted was to kill him, for hurting her, for almost killing her. If she moved a muscle, she was afraid she could actually break his neck. So she stood still, trying to hold back the heat that crawled through her bones and made her body burn. She stood still. Until she saw a bullet. That was when she moved again, seeing red. 

But Lena's voice brought her back. And she was herself again before she crossed a line of no return. 

Everything was fine, until it wasn't. And Kara was terrified of herself. Of what she could have done to that man. 

"Supergirl?" Alex's voice sounded through her comms, "Supergirl? Can you hear me?"

"Alex..." Kara gasped, trying to speak but the words seemed shut. 

"You have been to Lcorp already, haven't you?" She asked, so people probably knew what happened, or at least some version of it. The policed had been called, so they got there and found an unconscious man, a broken wall, a detonator, blood, and Lena Luthor was nowhere to be found. Kara couldn't even begin to imagine what the news were speculating about all of that. Did they have and ID on that man yet? Did they found out his reasons? How did he manage to get in? Did he actually put any bombs inside?, "Did you take Lena with you? Where are you right now?"

Kara tried really hard to answer, but she couldn't even breathe. She heard her name echoing for a while and the line went dead as she kept standing still on that dark and cold alley, lost even though she knew exactly where she was. 

Gladly, Alex got there a couple of minutes later. She probably used the tracker she had on Supergirl to find Kara, her blue eyes still staring at the blood on her hands. She felt the soft touch coming from Alex's hand on her cheeks, forcing her to look at her sister.

"Hey, I'm here. Talk to me." Alex called her attention back to the real world, "Kara?"

"She almost died." Kara sobbed and Alex pulled her into a hug while her sister buried her face on her shoulders, "She almost- And she could still die and I can't-"

"You got there in time. You brought her here and potentially saved her life. Now the doctors are looking after her. Alright? We have to trust them now." Alex tenderly told her as she caressed Kara's back, trying to calm her down, "I've got you. But you have to be strong, Kara, because there is a little girl that is really scared with all of this and will need her mother."

"Oh, Rao. Ellie... She knows already? How?"

"It's all they talk about on TV right now. Sam called while I was on my way here. They were about to put on the movie when they saw the news... But I'll let her know in which hospital we are so they can come."

"What am I going to say to her?" Kara panicked among her tears, "How can I possibly explain to Ellie what happened? What if she asks if Lena is going to die? I can't say for sure that she won't and I-"

"You don't need to tell her everything but you will need to be honest." Alex calmly replied, "Just say that the doctors are doing all they can, okay? And if you can't, don't worry, I'll be there and I'll help you because I know it will be hard."

Kara tried to answer with words, but all she could get out was a groan and a nod. 

"Now, you need to change clothes so we can go inside and wait for more news."

"Alright." Kara nodded, finally feeling herself again. She wiped the tears from her swollen eyes and fixed her posture. Alex gave her a sad smile as she squeezed her sister's shoulder. When she was dressed as Kara Danvers and got rid of the blood in her hands, she entered the hospital through the front door, Alex walking right by her side. When they were close to the reception, Kara realized she was no one to Lena Luthor. No one but her ex. They wouldn't allow her to see her. 

But, for her complete shock, a familiar silhouette was standing in front of the counter, speaking angrily to the receptionist as she tried to look for whatever it was on her computer at the same time she tried to handle whomever was trying to talk to her on the phone. 

"Lillian?" Kara called her, and the woman turned towards her immediately. She looked at Kara with an unimpressed expression, sighing as she watched the blonde walking in her direction.

"Kara Danvers. Of course." Lillian rolled her eyes. Judging by the makeup and the fancy dress, she probably had been to a party or was about to go to one. Maybe to Lcorp's reopening? Lena didn't mention inviting her. But not being invited would even stop her from going if she wanted?, "Seeing you here explains a lot, actually. Lena wouldn't just move back to this city all of a sudden with only business on her mind."

"Mrs. Luthor, excuse me. I'm sorry for the inconvenience, you're cleared to go. The doctors will inform you on your daughter's state as soon as they have something." The receptionist told her. Lilian just nodded, walking towards the waiting room. Kara's first instinct was to follow her.

"They're with me." Lilian told her when the receptionist was about to stop her and Alex from going any further. She quietly thanked Lilian as they walked together. She had seen her in person only once, when she was at Lena's office back when they used to date, they were having a lunch date on the couch when Lilian entered unannounced. Lena was furious and her temper didn't get any better as Lilian's attitude towards Kara was boastful and hostile, making sure she didn't leave any doubt on how much she disapproved Lena dating a reporter. 

So that nice little gesture surprised Kara. 

"You brought her here, didn't you?" Lilian whispered after the three of them sat down. Both Alex and Kara widened her eyes, "Do not try to fool me. I know exactly who you are."

"I-I did. Yes." Kara gulped. She didn't know how Lilian knew she was Supergirl. Lex told her? Or did she find it on his things, his diaries? One thing Kara was sure of was that Lena would never tell her mother that. But it didn't really matter how she knew, at least not in that moment.

"Thank you." Lilian pressed her lips as she let go of the words with certain struggle, "I haven't... Spoken to Lena. Not since Lex passed away. I tried calling after a few years but I never had the heart of just going to her in person. I was angry out of my mind when I saw everything she was doing to Luthorcorp but... Well, I saw today as an opportunity to finally see her again, and then this happens."

"She is paying for things that she didn't do. For things that Lex did." Kara hissed, and she felt Alex's hand squeezing her right after, trying to stop her from arguing with Lilian. Kara was angry, because Lena had told her how Lilian belittled her regardless of what she did and praised Lex for whatever he accomplished. She was harsh on Lena and the most responsible for the fact that she never felt like home with the Luthors. And Kara grew around so much love that she couldn't believe a parent could do that to their child. 

"I know. And she doesn't deserve it." Lilian's calm answer caught Kara off guard. She was expecting her to defend Lex, but she didn't. She just complied, "Look what it took for me to remember what really matters."

And those words hit Kara hard. Because she had been so worried about making sure the moment she would finally share her feelings with Lena was perfect that she forgot that what she felt was what really mattered and she had to let Lena know, regardless of where they were and what they were doing. What really mattered was that she loved Lena, she never stopped loving her, she was always the first thing she thought about in the morning and before she went to sleep at night. She just had to tell her. 

Their attention turned towards the small TV on the corner of the waiting room when they heard Lena's name being said while air footage of Lcorp was being displayed under a "Breaking News" banner on the bottom of the screen.

_"... And when the police arrived at the scene all they found was a puddle of fresh blood, a broken wall and the unconscious body of Peter Willis, who had worked for the Daily Planet as a reporter for six years before the terrorist attack committed by Lex Luthor, that took the life of many, including Mr.Willis' wife, Molly Willis, who was a colonist for the newspaper. They had two daughters together, one of them being just an infant by the time she died. It is believed that was the motivation for him to threaten the life of Lena Luthor and many others inside the building, as into further investigation the authorities encountered homemade bombs implanted on the elevators, but the police is still waiting for Mr. Willis to recover and give his testimony. It was reported that Supergirl came to Miss Luthor's rescue and took her to the hospital but she did get injured by a gunshot regardless of the hero's efforts. That is still to be confirmed by the authorities as well as the possibility that the person who made the call and let the police know about Mr. Willis plans came from one of his daughters."_

Lilian sighed heavily by Kara's side and started massaging her temples, Alex hugged her sister from the side, silently telling her that she was by her side to walk through all of that with her. And Kara let herself relax in her sisters arms, staying that way until she heard the familiar heartbeat of her daughter getting closer and closer. She got up and could see Sam at the reception, Ruby was by her side, a worried expression on both of their faces. Kara asked herself for a second where Ellie was, but she quickly got the answer to that as she saw the little girl running towards her, despite of the receptionist yelling at her she couldn't go inside the room nor run inside the hospital. Kara kneeled down so she could hug her, and Ellie held her so desperately and strongly that Kara felt a lump in her throat. 

"Where's my mom?" Ellie asked with swollen blue eyes, her face red with the tears, "What happened?" 

"A bad man hurt her." Kara forced the words to come out after a few seconds of just looking back at Ellie feeling nothing but pain for seeing her daughter like that, "But the doctors are doing their best to fix her. Okay?" 

"But why her? She didn't do anything wrong." Ellie questioned, at that point Kara was having some trouble understanding what she was saying. 

"I know." Kara pressed her lips and took Ellie on her arms, lifting her as she hugged her tightly and Ellie burried her face on Kara's shoulder. When Kara turned around, she finally noticed Lillian's horrified look towards them. 

That was when Kara realized that Lillian had absolutely no idea that Ellie existed. 

"When will they finish fixing her? I want to see her." Ellie whispered, her face still hidden as she spoke. 

"We have to be patient, little girl." 

"I'm not good at that, mommy." Ellie referring to Kara as that made Lillian's look get even more terrified. 

"We'll wait together." Kara assured her as she passed her fingers through her daughter's golden hair in a comforting way. Alex, Sam and Ruby were sat down down, Ruby was resting her head on Alex's shoulders as Alex held Sam's hand. They all gave Kara a solidary look as she sat down by their side, with Ellie still on her arms and with no intention of moving. 

And there she fell asleep about half an hour later, Kara gently lifted her head a little when it almost fell from her shoulder.

"This girl..." Lillian started when she noticed Ellie was asleep, "She's really Lena's daughter? Lena actually has a daughter and didn't tell me about it?"

"She wanted to keep her safe." Kara coldly replied. 

"Are you implying that I am some sort of threat to my own granddaughter?" Lillian looked truly offended. 

"She's half alien. Half mine." Kara was careful not to higher her tone and risk waking Ellie up, but she was annoyed that Lillian was being so cynical, as if she would want anything to do with Ellie since she was almost as anti-alien as Lex was. 

"Well, that's not the... Perfect arrangement but-"

"But what? I mean, how could Lena not have known that after she had a daughter with an alien whose cousin killed her brother, your favorite son, you would suddenly become a decent mother to her? Yeah she really should have contacted you."

"Kara." Alex touched her sister's shoulders. She had been listening closely to the conversation, ready to step in as soon as she felt like she needed. Kara sighed deeply and closed her blue eyes, not really sure of where all of that anger was coming from. 

"Excuse me." The doctor's voice called their attention and all of them got up from their chairs instinctively. The doctor sightly widened his eyes, not ready for that reaction, but recomposed himself quickly, "You're all with Lena Luthor?"

"Yes. How is she?" Kara quickly asked, her heart pounding against her chest and her hands sweating as she struggled to keep her balance since she had Ellie on her arms. 

"She's fine. The surgery went smoothly, luckily the bullet went in and out without touching any vital organs so all we had to do was getting rid of the small pieces it left behind, that was what took so long. She won't be asleep for much longer, so you can go see her if you want." He told them with a small smile when noticed the relief in everyone's faces. It was past midnight already and visit hours were definitely over, but Lena was still the owner of that hospital, she had bought it before she moved back to Metropolis, so Kara figured she didn't actually have to follow the rules like everyone else. 

"I want to be there when she wakes up. And talk to her alone. You can go in after I'm done." It wasn't much of a question, but Lillian really tried to sound as amicable as possible. Kara nodded, suddenly feeling calmer and already sorry for the way she talked to Lilian just a few seconds ago. It had all been just the fear of losing Lena out of nowhere. 

"Thank you, for letting us see her." Sam thanked her with a small smile, she had shook hands with Lillian when she arrived, she probably knew her since she was very young but they never had much of a friendship. Lillian smiled back at her and asked the doctor for the directions to Lena's room and he offered to take her there himself. 

"I'm so glad she's okay." Alex sighed as they all sat back on their seats.

"Me too. That was a scare." Sam agreed. 

"By the way, Kara, what was that? The way you talked to Lena's mother, I've never seen you talking like that to anyone." Alex asked her sister with furrowed eyebrows. Kara looked down to the floor, embarrassed of herself, "You even sounded like me."

"I'm so angry, Alex." She confessed, still not making eye contact with her sister, afraid to see judgment in her eyes even though she couldn't remember one time where Alex wasn't understanding with her, "I mean, now I'm better just... Glad Lena is going to be okay but... When I got to Lcorp... I almost killed that guy. Just by the sight of Lena being hurt I... My head just pictured thousand ways I could kill him and all of them would be so easy. I have never felt anything like that before, not even with red Kryptonite. It was almost... Beyond me."

"Kara..."

"I guess I understand Clark now." Kara pressed her lips into a thin line, "And, for a moment, all of the fears that I had when I broke up with Lena were thrown right back into my face."

"You're not going to tell her to leave, right?" Alex asked, worried.

"It wasn't your fault what happened to Lena. Actually, the only reason she is alive now it's because you saved her." Sam added with a frown. 

"I love Lena. And Ellie." Her eyes looked down to Ellie, who still slept peacefully on her arms. Kara focused on her breathing for a few seconds, and that finally brought her peace, "I just need to manage my fear of losing them. I can't let it get bigger than me."

"You are Supergirl." Alex whispered, "And, you're Kara Danvers. The two people I admire the most in this world. Nothing is bigger than you."

"Thank you, Alex." Kara smiled and Alex smiled back at her, squeezing her hand since she couldn't hug her without disturbing Ellie. 

"I'll get us some coffee." Sam announced before getting up. Ruby got up as well, asking if she could get something from the snack machine and Sam nodded before both of them walked out of the waiting room. She was back not much later with the cups and Ruby had what was probably two chocolate bars on her hand. She gave one to Kara, telling her it was for Ellie and Kara thanked her with a smile. 

They were all finished with their coffee when Lillian showed up again at the waiting room. Her eyes were slightly red, what gave away she had been crying, but she had a peaceful aspect, so her talk to Lena must have gone well. 

"She's asking for you." Lillian told Kara.

"Alex, can you-"

"Sure. Hand her over." Alex opened her arms and Kara carefully deposited Ellie on Alex's arms. For a moment, she thought Ellie would wake up since she stiffened a little with the change, but she quickly snuggled herself on her aunt's arms. 

"I won't be long." She assured them. Lillian was still standing there, awkwardly looking at the women, unsure if she should stay with them or leave. 

"I'll get going now. She's on the 202." Lillian let them know. Kara nodded, wanting to apologize for being so harsh with her earlier, but couldn't get it out before Lillian left the room. She decided to leave it for later as she walked across the hallways, her heart was beating in a fast pace.

When she reached Lena's room, the door was open and Lena was looking out the window, thoughtfully staring at the moon across the glass. Kara thought about knocking so she wouldn't startle her, but Lena noticed she was there in a matter of seconds, a wide smile growing across her face when her eyes met Kara's. And Kara smiled too as she mindlessly walked towards Lena and just hugged her, trying her best not to crush her bones as she held her against her chest, feeling the warmth of her skin and listening to her steady heartbeat and feeling just so glad for being able to hear that sound again. Lena's heartbeat had brought her peace and helped her sleep so many times, it was like it sounded different from others, Kara could tell it was hers even if she was in the middle of a crowded place. 

"Hey. I'm okay." Lena whispered against Kara's shoulder, "Thanks to you, Supergirl."

"Lena... I..." Kara didn't want to let go of her, but she had to, because she wanted to be looking into her forest green eyes as she finally told her what she had been wanting to, "I love you. I have never stopped loving you. Everyday I opened my eyes and you were the first thing I thought of, and I had to spend the rest of the day trying to convince myself that telling you to leave was the right thing to do but I was never actually successful with that. And now you're here, you're back, and I can't waste any more time. I want to be with you, I want to take you on a date again, but I can't promise I won't cheat on carnival games to impress you." Kara told her almost in a single breath and Lena just listened with tears falling down her face as she listened, "I want us to raise our daughter together, to take her to places she has never been to and to do things she never did, and we can tell her bedtime stories and she can finally teach us basic cooking. I want to fill your apartment with my stuff and have you yelling at me for making a mess, I want to... To marry you, one day, and I'll be a Luthor, or you'll be a Danvers, or we could be Luthor-Danvers together. I just... I want you, Lena."

Lena just stared at Kara for a few seconds, as if she had forgotten every single word in the english language. She couldn't speak, but she could move and she grabbed the collar of Kara's button-ups and pulled her closer, kissing her deeply and desperately, almost the same way she did when they had kissed the last time eight years ago. 

"I love you too. And I want you too. And everything else you just said." Lena breathlessly told her after they broke their kiss apart. 

"I'm so sorry. I wish... I wish I would've gotten there sooner-"

"Kara, I'm fine. You saved me. And I... I don't even know how I'll ever repay you for that." 

"I can think of something...." Kara smirked and leaned in for another kiss. Lena laughed slightly but kissed her back. They just broke apart when Kara picked up familiar voices on the hallway approaching them, she could clearly hear Ellie complaining that Kara had left her at the waiting room and Alex was trying to reason with her as they walked. Both Kara and Lena looked towards the door when Ellie and Alex appeared, Alex giving them an apologetic for not being able to hold Ellie for long after she woke up, but all Kara and Lena did was smile at the sight of their daughter. 

"Mom!" Ellie yelled when she saw Lena on the bed. Kara lifted Ellie so she could climb on the bed and Lena opened her arms to wrap her into a hug. She closed her eyes, relieved to be able to hug her daughter again. She had been scared too, of dying, of leaving Ellie behind. She knew she would still have a family, an amazing family, but she also knew the feeling of losing a mother so young and she didn't want Ellie to go through that, "Mom, are you okay?"

"I'm okay, El." Lena assured her. She looked a little pale, but she had just been through surgery so it was to be expected. 

"I was so scared."

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. But everything is fine now. Mom is fine." Lena kissed Ellie's forehead. 

"And you came here without bringing me!" Ellie accused Kara, her eyes glowing with tears as she was probably tired and overwhelmed with everything happening around her. 

"I did, I'm sorry." Kara apologized, "But I made a promise to you, remember? And I kept it."

A smile grew on Ellie's face as she remembered what Kara had promised her and she hugged Lena once again, but this time she pulled Kara along, the three of them hugging each other with closed eyes and a loving grip. After a few seconds, Kara glanced at Alex above her shoulder, and her sister was watching that scene with a genuine smile on her face as she stood in front of the door.

And Kara knew that, from that moment on, she had everything she could've possibly ask for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've been having a hard time with life lately, but i still managed to get this (huge) chapter out for you guys!


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, they start over from where it all ended

"Hey. Good morning, Supergirl." Lena greeted Kara when she flew inside the apartment through the balcony. She was standing at the kitchen, an apron shielding her clothes from the oil as she fried a couple of eggs, making sure they didn't mix inside the pan. 

"I feel like you love calling me Supergirl." Kara arched an eyebrow with a small smile on her face as she watched Lena putting the eggs on a plate just above two pieces of bacon. Kara smile grew wider when she realized the food had been placed to form a smiley face. Close to that plate was also a bowl of fruit, another one with chocolate cereal and some toast, probably enough food to satisfy the small alien.

"I do. I like the name, it's probably better than anything I could ever come up for you." Lena confessed as she wiped her hands clean with the dishrag that was on the kitchen counter. 

"We have Cat Grant to thank for that."

"Why are you in your suit? Everything okay?" Lena asked her with worried eyes. 

"Yeah, just an emergency in the middle of the sea, It's all settled now." Kara waved off her worries, leaning over the counter that was between them and giving Lena a quick kiss then stealing an apple from the fruit bowl in front of her. Lena couldn't help but smile as Kara adorably stood in front of her as she mindlessly ate her fruit, "You're up early."

"Yeah... I couldn't really sleep much."

"Why? Are you okay? Are you feeling pain?"

"I'm fine." Lena gave her a reassuring smile. She still felt pain sometimes, like a pinch from a needle where her wound was whenever she walked too much or sit in a bad position, it had been a couple of days since she was discharged from the hospital, under strict instructions to not pull any weight or engage in any other extreme physical activities, "I was just... A little bit anxious about today. The interview with Cat..."

"You don't really have to go. We can call it off."

"No. I want to do this. I owe it more to myself than to the curious people out there. More importantly, I owe this to Ellie." Lena firmly told her. She had asked Kara to arrange that interview with Cat, wanting to just get rid of as many rumors, assumptions and lies about her life as she could. Also, she couldn't bear hiding Ellie's existence any longer, she wanted her daughter to be able to live a normal life, even though she would forever be a Luthor, she would be at least free to do many things that for so long she couldn't. 

"Okay."

"And there's also leaving Ellie with my mother."

"You're not sure about it?" Kara carefully asked. 

"It's not quite that... I guess it's new. Feels weird, to have a normal relationship with her." Lena told her as she poured a cup of coffee for both of them. Kara took hers with a grateful smile. When Lena woke up at the hospital after the surgery, the last person she had expected to see was her mother. But there she was, her light green eyes overflowing with tears as she held Lena's pale hand with a strong grip. And when Lena looked at her, she gave in to the tears and crashed down by her side, begging Lena to forgive her. For all those years of mistreating her, dismissing her, and treating her like she was less than what she actually was. Lillian told her how scared she was to lose another child. And Lena didn't think twice before believing in her. She had never seen Lillian show any kind of fragility, and seeing her just pouring out her heart like that was enough reason to give her a chance, "And, to be honest, I don't know if my mother knows where she's getting into."

"What do you mean?"

"Ellie is... She can be... My mother is not good with children. But she insisted so much and Ellie was so excited to spend more time with her..."

"Lena. Listen, it's going to be fine. They'll... Probably get along. And you're going to get everything you need out of your chest at that interview, and after that you're going on a date with your brand new girlfriend."

"Will my brand new girlfriend go get changed then?" Lena grinned and Kara nodded slowly. 

"She was hoping she could shower here and, if she remembers correctly, there are still some of her clothes from the past week here." Kara asked, she had actually left some clothes there from the nights she had spent in Lena's apartment with Ellie while Lena was at the hospital. Ellie couldn't spend the night with her mother during those days, so she refused to be anywhere but her own bedroom. 

"Well, she is more than welcome to take a shower and yes her clothes are washed and folded inside my closet."

"Mom?" They heard Ellie's sleepy voice coming from the hallway. 

"In the kitchen!" Lena's tone was high even though Ellie could hear her even if she whispered. Seconds later, her daughter was rushing towards the kitchen. She flew and jumped on Kara's back, hugging her from behind. It always made Lena's heart grow bigger whenever she saw how happy Ellie was to see Kara every time. 

"Mommy!"

"Good morning, little girl." Kara smiled as Ellie let go of her and sat on the stool by her side, "Sleep well?"

"Yes. I dreamed of dinosaurs trying to eat pizza but their hands were too tiny."

"Sounds fun." Kara laughed as she told her. Lena then pushed the plate she had prepared for Ellie towards her. 

"Here, your breakfast."

"Thank you." Ellie smiled as she noticed the face that her food formed. Her smile turned into a grimace when Kara stole one of her pieces of bacon, "Hey! Don't steal my food. Mom, tell her not to!"

"Kara. Don't steal our daughter's food, please." Lena playfully scolded her and Kara laughed. 

"Sorry."

"Is grandma coming?"

"She'll be here at any moment now." Lena assured her, still a little surprised at how easily Ellie liked Lillian. They had spent a few hours together at the hospital, Ellie had been very clingy of Lena after what happened and spent long hours at the hospital with her, not that Lena felt bothered by that in any way, it actually brought her peace to have Ellie on her sights, but, somehow, Lillian always managed to visit Lena when no one else was around. Lena asked herself if it had been a coincidence or if Lillian had been avoiding to see Ellie. 

It happened eventually, when Ellie had taken a Monopoly board to the hospital one afternoon and had asked Lena to teach her, so she could be ready to game night. They were in the middle of it when Lillian arrived and, somehow, Ellie convinced Lillian she would teach her Monopoly. Lillian, who had never got close to a game that wasn't chess. 

"Okay."

"I'll take a quick shower then. So I'm ready before she gets here." Kara announced before kissing her daughter's forehead. She pretended she would steal more food from Ellie's plate and the girl groaned. Lena laughed at them, feeling grateful for that small moment as she watched Kara walking away. Not long after she left, the doorbell rang. Ellie looked at the door excitedly as Lena walked towards it after taking off her apron, opening to reveal her mother standing outside with a handful of bags.

"Mother?" Lena arched an eyebrow at how many things her mother dragged inside as she entered.

"Lena. How are you feeling?"

"I'm alright. What is all this?"

"I'm starting my job as a grandmother. Beggining with spoiling the child rotten." Lillian told her as if it was obvious. When her eyes met Ellie's, a smile grew on her lips, "Hey, Ellie."

"Grandma!" Ellie exclaimed as she got down from the stool, running towards Lillian. She stopped between her and the bags, seemed usure if she should hug her or not. She did when Lillian opened her arms, welcoming the strange but warm feeling of affection. Lena blinked a few times, but ended up giving her mother a small smile when she noticed her mother's expression of fondness. 

Lena could tell that Ellie was loving to see her family, that used to be only herself and her mother, grow so big all of a sudden. 

"These are all for you."

"Gifts?" 

"Yes." Lillian nodded while Ellie looked at all those bags with wide eyes behind her round glasses. Lena pressed her lips, she never really denied Ellie anything she wanted but she also didn't just shower her with gifts as much as she was perfectly capable of doing so. She wanted her to value things. But... It wouldn't hurt to let her be spoiled once in a while," I... Don't really know what you'd like but-"

"Thank you!" Ellie hugged her again, before she even saw the gifts, "Can I open them?"

"How about you finish your breakfast first?"

"Okay..." Ellie agreed, not happy, but obedient. 

"Then, please make sure she takes a shower and-"

"Lena. Don't worry. I got this." Lillian assured her. And Lena had to bite back a snark comment about how Lena was mostly cared by nannies while she was a small child so Lillian probably wouldn't know what to do. 

But, she was trying to give her a chance, so she kept it inside. 

"Lillian." Kara greeted her with formality as she walked back in the living room. Lena knew that Kara was still taken aback by Lillian and she understood her. Before they broke up, Kara was the one there for her after countless arguments Lena had with her mother, after all the times she had made her feel miserable. But Kara was trying really hard to believe she was actually willing to make things work between them. 

"Kara." Lillian greeted her back in the same tone. 

"Are you ready?" Kara looked at Lena, who nodded. 

"We'll be back tonight. If you need anything, you can just call us." Lena said, unsure if to Ellie or to Lillian. 

"Can we play Monopoly later? I want to practice a little for game night." Ellie asked Lillian, "And now that you like games, you could come too, Grandma!"

"I... I wouldn't want to intrude."

"Actually, she's right." Kara agreed and Lena looked at her in surprise, "You should come. My mother is coming over from Midvale, I think you would like to meet her."

"When is it?" She asked, probably thinking about her trip back to Germany. She had moved there shortly after Lex death, to start over in a new place, where being a Luthor didn't matter. She told Lena she had found herself again in science, working at a research lab. She promised she would come to visit as much as she could, but she should head back before Sunday, they needed her back there to help with their current work. 

"Friday."

"In that case, sure. I'll be there." Lillian nodded and Kara offered her a small smile, like a peace offer between them. And Lena felt her shoulders so much lighter at the sight of everything falling into place. 

"Okay. Bye, El. I'll be home soon." Lena wanted to kneel down and hug her daughter, but she couldn't do so because of her bandages, so she just caressed her warm cheek. 

"But you really will this time, right?" Ellie looked at her with worried eyes and Lena felt a lump on her throat, tears threatening jumping out of her her eyes, but she kept them inside. 

"Of course." She weakly told her, and Ellie seemed to easily believe her, rushing towards the kitchen to finish her breakfast like Lena had told her. 

Not longer after that they were at CatCo, walking side by side as the attention was fully turned towards them. Cat Grant was sitting on her table, as dominant as always with a drink on one hand and a printed article on the other, her glasses almost falling down her nose as she read the words with focus and interest. Her eyes lifted when Kara softly knocked on her glass door and Cat looked surprised at them even though she was already expecting them there. 

"Lena Luthor. It's good to see you again." Cat got up from her chair to shake hands with Lena. 

"Likewise."

"I'm glad you decided to come here to tell your story."

"Kara insisted." Lena lied, just to make Kara look good in front of Cat and Kara, of course, was immediately flustered, "And you're the second journalist in this city I trust the most. Losing only to her."

"Of course." Cat rolled her eyes, faking disgust at Lena's affectionate words. 

"I'll leave you guys to it then." Kara told Lena, squeezing her shoulder slightly before she left, closing the door behind her. 

"Have a seat, please. Can I offer you a drink?"

"No, I'm good, thank you." Lena told her as she sat down besides Cat on the sofa inside her office. She lost herself for a few seconds, her eyes staring at the multiple screens behind Cat's desk that displayed many different news channels. 

"I'll be recording this, so I can be as accurate as possible in my words." Cat explained as she put her phone down on the coffee table with the recorder app on the screen. Lena sighed, preparing herself for whatever questions Cat could throw at her.

At first, it felt invasive. Cat was straightforward and cared little if she was opening old wounds with her direct questions about Lena's past. But Lena was nothing but honest, making it clear that she did not resent people who saw her as a threat because of what her brother did. Instead, she focused her energy on using what he left behind to create things that would bring everyone advantages, most importantly the environment. When she was asked about the reasons why she was moving the company to National City, she mentioned her daughter, not saying her name but using the cover story she had decided with Kara when they talked about it, fertility treatment before the breakup. She told Cat that her and Kara were going to raise their daughter together from that moment on. 

The interview ended with Lena giving Cat a glimpse of the future for Lcorp, the projects Lena had in mind for the next few years of her company. They shook hands once again when it was over, and Kara was waiting at her own desk outside, looking expectantly at Lena when she heard her heels echoing CatCo's floor. 

"So, how was it? Are you okay?" Kara asked her with worry on her blue eyes.

"You weren't listening?" Lena furrowed her eyebrows and Kara grimaced, shaking her head rapidly, making Lena laugh louder than she'd want to, "You're helpless."

"Sorry." Kara gave her a guilty smile and Lena wanted to kiss her, but she didn't want to be inappropriate at her work's environment, so she stopped herself, "But how are you feeling?"

"I'm... Okay." Lena told her, really feeling like she was free of a heavy burden, "But I could use a drink."

"Aren't you lucky, because I know just the place." Kara smiled, grabbing Lena's hand and walking her towards the elevator. 

And Kara took her to her apartment. A place where Lena used to think she would never see again. She stood in front of the door after Kara entered, feeling the air around her heavy as she stared at the inside. It had barely any changes since Lena had last seen it, it had the same cozy combination of furniture and colors, just different pictures on the shelves and different pillows on the couch. And she remembered all the moments she lived in there, all the good memories the place that once felt most like home than everywhere else. 

But there was also the worst memory her head could think of. Herself, years ago, hugging her own legs as she cried until she didn't have any more tears.

"Lena?" Kara asked her, saving her from the dark places her mind wanted to drag her into, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Lena gasped, going inside in hesitant steps after closing the door behind her. 

"I'm sorry. I thought the best place for us to start over was here but..."

"No, Kara, please. Don't apologize. It's just... Been a long time. And I think you're right. There's no place better to start over than here." Lena reassured her, giving Kara a warm smile as Kara looked at her with worry and guilt, but then she nodded, trusting Lena's words.

"Okay... I.... Well, sit, please." Kara told her, babbling nervously as she gestured towards the couch. Lena smiled slightly as she sat down as Kara asked, watching her put on the coffee table a bottle of wine and a tray with cheese and fruit that had certainly been prepared before, making it clear that Kara had planned that. Her cheeks were as red as they were on their actual first date, and Lena couldn't help but stare at her, wordlessly and lovingly, "What?"

"Nothing." Lena looked away, feeling her own cheeks burn, "So, I see you planned this."

"Me? No. This was a totally spontaneous thought I had just now." Kara awkwardly told her as she smiled shyly, "I haven't even been thinking about this moment since I mentioned going on a date with you a week ago."

And Lena just laughed, she couldn't think of anyone who made her laugh as much as Kara did. 

"Wine?" Kara offered, taking the bottle with gentleness, then face palming herself when she realized she forgot the glasses, "One second."

And it literally took one second as she rushed in and out of the kitchen faster than the blink of an eye. She then filled the cup, offering to Lena, who took a small sip after she laughed slightly.

"It's a shame you can't actually enjoy a drink with me." Lena told her as she felt the sweet taste of wine on her tongue. They had drinks before, but, after Kara told her she was an alien, she also told her that she couldn't get drunk on earth, and Lena had always wondered, at least until the moment she knew, how Kara could possibly drink as much as she did and not get even a little bit tipsy. 

"Well..." Kara then rushed in and out of the kitchen again, bringing with her a glass bottle with no label on it, which carried an orange liquid.

"What is that?"

"Alien beverage!"

"You're kidding. Really?" Lena's mouth fell open in surprise as her eyes studied the bottle, "Where did you find this?" 

"It's a long story, actually." Kara started while she filled her cup the strange liquid that had a sweet smell and a texture similar to honey, "I bought it at an alien bar that I discovered through J'onn, a man that works at the DEO. He has been like a father to me and Alex all these years."

"The DEO... I've been there but I didn't quite understand what is gong on."

"It's a... Secret organization, focused on protecting National City from alien threats. Alex had been working there since before I met you. And I have been working with them since I became Supergirl" Kara told her, then added with a bothered tone, "Otherwise they wouldn't let me work at all."

"Really?" Lena asked, interested in knowing more about what she had missed on Kara's life. All she knew was about Supergirl's battles, when she didn't watch them, she read about them on the newspapers, with her heart on her throat every time her eyes went through the words even though she knew Kara was okay. 

"Not only that but I had to work really hard to prove myself even worthy of working with them." Kara sighed, "I'm sure my cousin didn't go trough that much trouble when he wore the cape."

"I wonder why." Lena didn't really have to wonder and neither did Kara, both of them had to fight double standards their whole lives, "Speaking of which... Have you heard from him?"

"Barely." Kara told her after taking a bigger sip from her drink as she thought of her cousin, "He sends messages sometimes, pictures of the places he visits. He's traveling around the world using human ways of transportation, spends like, weeks from one place to another. But I think he's happy. That's what matters. I just... Wish he would show up once in a while. He would be happy to know that we are not the only kryptonians in the world anymore, but I don't want to text him that."

"I'm sorry, Kara." Lena touched her shoulder gently and Kara gave her hand a quick squeeze.

"It's fine." She shook her head as if she didn't care, but Lena could see through it. She knew how important her cousin was to her, "Sometimes I wonder how things would have been if we got to be Superman and Supergirl, fighting side by side... But there's no use in thinking about things that we can't change."

Lena stared at Kara's blue eyes and lifted her glass of wine, thinking over all the things she also wished were different. Her mother, her brother, her life with Kara.

"To all the things that we can't change." Lena offered, and Kara raised her glass too, clinking it with Lena's. They both drank all the content of it at once and filled their cups again. 

"Lena, I have to tell you something." Kara started with a small smile on her face, "I get drunk very, very easily."

"Oh no." Lena pressed her lips in concern but they both laughed immediately after, "Actually, I should have foreseen this. It matches your personality."

"My personality?"

"Yeah. A walking ray of sunshine would obviously get drunk after two shots."

"I don't know if this was a compliment."

"Towards you, darling, it always is."

"I missed you." Kara let out, her blue eyes staring deeply into Lena's eyes as she spoke, "You can always cheer me up. It's like magic."

"Want to see a trick, then?" Lena smugly asked and Kara's eyebrows furrowed, but she nodded. Lena then scooped closer, holding Kara's jaw gently as she pulled her head closer. She then kissed Kara, slowly, feeling the taste of honey mix with the grapes of the wine she had, "Abracadabra."

"I like this trick." Kara contently told her, the words slipping slowly through her mouth. 

"You can't be drunk already." Lena shook her head as she laughed.

"I warned you."

"Is it possible that I feel like I'm falling in love with you all over again, even though I have never really fallen out of love?"

Kara's face was brightened with a wide smile at Lena's words and she pulled her closer to another kiss. And that was how they spent the next hours, laughing at some silly thing Kara said and kissing each other, just like it used to be before everything was ruined. 

And, when the night came, they made their way back to Lena's apartment, opening the door slowly, trying to not make any noise, but failed when they started to laugh after Kara tipped on her own shoes. Lena had seen her being clumsy before, but that one time it was funnier for some reason, it was probably the wine. Lillian then cleared her throat, making her presence known by that, and Kara and Lena looked at her, guilty in their eyes as they stared at Lillian.

"Mother. Hey." Lena awkwardly greeted her. Lillian had a smirk on her face, watching the two women as if they were both teenagers getting home after curfew. She had a book on her hands, the living room was dark except for a single light that was making it possible for her to read, "How was the day?"

"Fine, as I told you in all those texts." Lillian rolled her eyes. Lena had sent her messages during the day, asking for updates about their day together, "Ellie is a lovely girl, very intelligent. We engaged in many activities together. I'm sure she'll tell you all about it tomorrow."

"Great. Good." Lena nodded repeatedly, "Thank you for watching her."

"She's asleep in her room. I should get going-"

"What? Of course not. You can take the guest room." 

"Alright, thank you." The smirk was still on Lillian's face as she closed the book and got up from the chair she was sitting, walking slowly towards the hallway that took to the bedrooms, "Goodnight, girls."

"Goodnight." Both of them said in a low tone as Lillian disappeared from their sights. They looked at each other and laughed again, both embarrassingly drunk as they also walked towards the hallway. They traced their way to Lena's bedroom, stopping in front of Ellie's door and poking their heads inside, just to check on her. She was sleeping peacefully as she hugged the stuffed animal she had gotten at the carnival as a prize. 

After that, they finally reached their destination, and Lena just threw herself on the bed, half tired from the lack of sleep she had the night before and the other half was most certainly the wine. 

"What are you doing?" Lena asked when Kara just stood there.

"I just wanted to make sure you would get here safe." She told her, "I'm going home now."

And, when she turned her back and was about to leave, Lena held her arm with a strong grip, that for Kara was obviously not strong, but she let it be as Lena pulled her towards the bed.

"You are home, Kara."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi there, i'm still here!! my classes started again and my course kind of takes most of what's supposed to be my free time, that's why I took so long  
> just a disclaimer here, I remember that "alien beverage" is supposed to be poisonous for humans and all, but i just wanted them to kiss so pretend with me its not,
> 
> thank you all for reading and until the next one!


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, they solve a mystery

"All of our guests confirmed they're coming tonight." Lena informed, walking towards the kitchen as she put her phone inside her pocket. She had a small smile on her face at the thought of having a full house for the first time, she had never been the host to anything and this time she was about to have almost ten people over for game night, "How are we doing here?"

"It's all good." Kara answered as she handed the pizza toppings while Ellie effortlessly yet carefully flattened the dough. Lena would rather just order food for everyone, but Ellie insisted she wanted to make the food herself, as always, she jumped at opportunities to cook. Also, Kara was excited with the idea of cooking with her daughter, so Lena didn't feel like talking them down, "But we might need some help."

"Okay. What can I do?" Lena walked to the sink and washed her hands so she could touch food. 

"Can you get me more flour?" Kara asked, her eyes looking down at the wooden board as she cut the pepperoni into small slices. 

"Sure." Lena nodded before she started looking for the flour sack. As soon as they settled down at pizza as the food for the night, she bough maybe twice as much flour as they would need to make all of them, yet she couldn't find any of them, "I could've sworn I put it here..."

"I think I saw some of it down here." Kara mindlessly told her. 

"Where?"

"Just below me." She pointed at a closed cabinet bellow her. She could've easily just gotten the flour herself, but her hands were occupied, so Lena willingly approached the cabinet, she didn't have to lean down to open its door but, before she could get her hands on the sack, Kara quickly crumpled the bottom of it with her hands and Lena's face was suddenly covered in white flour. Kara and Ellie burst in laughter while Lena spitted flour from her mouth.

"Yeah... I see it now." Lena told Kara, who laughed even more as Lena lifted the flour sack from the cabinet and put it over the counter. She didn't even try to be fast as she got a handful of flour and threw it over at Kara's face, getting a lot of it on her hair. Kara stopped for a second, shocked at the comeback while Lena and Ellie laughed at her. 

"Oh, so you're laughing?" Kara looked down at Ellie, whose eyes widened as she feared she would be attacked with flour too, "There's something on your face as well." 

Ellie furrowed her eyebrows in confusion before Kara smudged her face with the tomato sauce she was spreading over the pizza. That was when the real war started, Ellie stole the flour sack from Lena and started throwing handfuls of it at them, who tried to dodge as they thought of what to use to fight back, making a complete mess on the floor and on the counter, as if the latter wasn't messy enough with all the bowls and the sauces spread haphazardly over it. 

Kara ran after Lena with her hands covered in sauce, giving her a chance to at least run from her but then Kara grabbed her by her waist anyways, spreading sauce all over her checks while Lena laughed so hard that she started to struggle for air. Ellie took that opportunity to squeeze a ketchup bottle over her mothers, who screamed and tried to shield themselves from it.

"What the hell are you guys doing?" Alex asked while standing in front of the kitchen counter, holding a beer box that looked significantly heavy. The door had been left open since they knew Alex would be there, she had told them she would stop by to leave some drinks before she went to the airport to pick up Eliza, but Lena wasn't sure of how long she had been standing there, watching them, though the fact that none of them noticed her there, not even the two aliens with super hearing, was quite funny. 

Ellie looked over at her with a embarrassed smile, her Chef's hat almost falling down her head since she had been running around on the kitchen, that was now in ruins and the three of them would need a good and long shower. Ellie and Kara had aprons over their clothes but that didn't really spare them from getting all dirty, while Lena was pretty sure that her shirt was permanently ruined.

More embarrassed than the child were definitely the two adults, all covered in flour and tomato sauce as they straightened themselves, as if that would help hide anything.

"Uh... Kara started." Lena turned Kara in, receiving a hurt look from her, even thought it was true that she was the one who started.

"I'm.... Just... Going to leave this here and pretend I didn't see anything." Alex put the box down on the floor, "Good luck to whomever is cleaning this."

"You're not leaving before giving me a hug, right?"

"Don't you dare." Alex warned, but Kara was already running towards her sister with arms open and a smug smile on her face. Alex, however, was able to run outside and close the door before Kara actually reached her. Kara turned towards Lena and Ellie with a sad pout as she walked back to the kitchen.

"Come on, let's finish this, because now we also have a kitchen to clean up." Lena told Kara as she squeezed her shoulders. 

The three of them worked together and eventually they were finished with the pizzas. Kara and Ellie were the ones on cleaning duty, since they could get it finished way faster than Lena possibly could, so she just washed the dishes while the two aliens flew around the kitchen, that was back in its normal state within minutes. Before the first guest, Lillian, who wasn't really sure at what time she should go for an event like that since she never attended to one, arrived, they had taken their showers and set up the living room with the rest of the snacks and the boxes of board games that Kara had brought from her place. 

She had been practically living there with Ellie and Lena, and her presence left traces behind. Such as many of her books on the living room shelves, the ones that she always took to read while Lena was busy with paperwork, she never got to finish any of the books but appeared with a new one days later, the handmade blankets over the plain white couch that Kara used to cover Lena with whenever she fell asleep on the couch, and Lena always wondered how could they be so warm and fluffy, better than all the other blanket she had at home, the many clothes sharing the space of Lena's ones inside the closet and, somehow, even some of Kara's themed mugs found their way inside the kitchen cabinets. 

By seven, the house was full already.

Brainy and Nia got there with loads of ice cream and a card game about solving crimes and mysteries that Nia saw at a store and was really excited to play, Alex, Sam, Ruby and Eliza were next, taking with them two pies, one was Kara's favorite and the other one was nuts safe so Ellie could also enjoy. J'onn was one of the last ones to arrive, from all of the other guests he was the one who saw Ellie the least but that didn't stop him from falling in love with her within minutes in her presence, as it happened with everyone else, and Lena was pretty sure J'onn could melt where he stood when Ellie referred to him as grandpa. 

When they were all sat around the table with the games, they realized there was way too many people for Monopoly, they could always make teams but everyone would want to team up with Lena, so they decided to try the game Nia bought since that one didn't have a limit of players.

"Okay, so, it works like this." She started as she opened the box, taking out the card mount and putting it on the table, all the eyes were on her with full attention, "Every card has a small story, that tells what happened in a very cryptic way. The objective is to find out how it happened. The person who holds the card knows the answer, and you guys have to ask yes or no questions until you find out what is behind the mystery. Everyone got it?"

"Sounds cool. But, just so it's out there, I'm FBI so..." Alex bragged after everyone nodded, the reactions of the group were between eye rolling and slightly laughing. 

"It may surprise you, because it's never what it seems. I'll read the first one" Nia warned before drawing a card. She cleared her throat dramatically before reading what was written on it, "A woman gets to her building and walks to the elevator. The elevator isn't working, and that's when she realized her husband is dead."

"Interesting." Brainy put his hands together as he always did when he was thinking. 

"How exactly the elevator wasn't working?" Sam furrowed her eyebrows as she drank her glass of wine. 

"Yes or no questions." Nia reminded her.

"Okay, so, was the elevator broken?"

"No."

"Was her husband inside the elevator?" Kara asked. 

"No."

"Did she kill him?" Lena's mind was on the darkest scenario already.

"No!"

"Is it night?" Ruby offered.

"It doesn't really say here."

"Come on. How could she possibly know her husband is dead just by the elevator being out of service?" Alex complained as she ate her slice of pizza. 

"The elevator must be related to his death somehow." Lena analyzed as her green eyes stared at nowhere, "Maybe he got in and then it became out of service."

"But for that he had to be inside the elevator." Lillian remembered Nia specified that he wasn't. 

"Is he inside his house then?" Ellie asked and, for the first time, Nia nodded.

"Yes." She gave Ellie a small smile. 

"Did his wife call him and he didn't answer?" J'onn suggested. 

"She didn't have to call. I mean, no." Nia pressed her lips when she realized she gave them a small tip.

The doorbell rang and everyone instinctively looked towards the main door. Lena already knew who it was, so she got up and told them to keep trying as she walked towards the door. When she opened, she was greeted by a wide grin and then a warm hug from her friend. Jack had to work around his busy schedule a little bit to be there, but he made it work since he already missed Lena and Ellie even though it hadn't been a month since they left. 

"I'm so glad to see you. And in one piece, look at that!" He told her, then offered her a bottle of expensive wine.

"Thank you for always bringing me wine." She smiled as she closed the door behind him. He peaked at the living room, his dark eyes widened slightly when he noticed how many people were there. 

"Full house, huh." He commented with a smirk. This time, his voice called Ellie's attention, she lifted her head so she could see for sure who had arrived and, when her eyes met with Jack's, she bolted from the couch and ran towards him, who had his arms open to catch her. Lena had decided to keep it a secret from her so she could surprise her daughter and to see her so happy like that was always worth it.

"Uncle Jack!" She exclaimed as she hugged him as tightly as she could without hurting him. 

"Hey! It looks like someone is happy to see me."

"I am! I missed you."

"I missed you too, princess. I heard you have been a little brat, as always."

"Just a little bit." Ellie closed her fingers together to illustrate that and Jack gave her a light laugh. 

"Oh, yeah, just a little." Lena sarcastically agreed. 

"I have so much to tell you, but it will have to wait until we find out how the woman's husband died." She told him as he put her down on the floor. Jack laughed with confused eyes as she pulled him towards the living room where everyone else was still trying to figure the mystery out. He was welcomed warmly by everyone, even though he only really knew Sam and Kara. There was no awkwardness when Kara shook hands with him as he sat down by Ellie's side, both of them were smiling and the tension that was present during the first time they met had disappeared completely. 

"Okay, what did I miss?" Lena asked as she sat back down where she used to be, leaning her back against Kara's shoulder as the group quickly summarized to Jack how the game worked and what information they had so far. 

"Not much, since everything we ask Nia answers with a no." Alex answered her with annoyance, but it was clear she was actually devoted to finding out the answer, "But we know that the man wasn't murdered nor did he kill himself."

"Maybe he was sick." Lena shrugged. 

"Yes! And that's precious information, by the way." Nia told them, and they were all hopeful again after so many shots in the dark. 

"Okay, so he was sick. How does that relate to the elevator in any way?" Kara held her chin as she analyzed the situation, "Maybe it's about why the elevator is not working."

"The power?", Lena suggested, turning towards Kara as both of them thought about it together, "The elevator wouldn't work without it, and, depending on how sick he is, he could need some kind of life support-"

"Yes! You got it! That's it!" Nia cut her off as she slightly jumped on her chair, "He had an artificial lung, so, when she saw that the elevator wasn't working because the building didn't have any power, she knew he was dead."

"Oh my god. I need a drink." Alex got up from the couch and walked towards the kitchen, probably looking for something stronger than beer. Everyone else just looked at each other wordlessly nodding as they slowly accepted that, as specific as that was, it actually made sense. 

"You didn't like the game, babe?" Sam teased her, her tone high so Alex could hear her from the kitchen. 

"I hate it. Draw another card." She asked and the house was filled with laughs. 

They spent the next hour trying to figure out the next one, that had to do with a bar, a gun and hiccups. They were really annoyed with the answer to the mystery, as obvious as it was, it was kind of stupid, so they decided to move on to a different game, Pictionary, a long time favorite of everyone. The rest of the night was filled with laughs and playful teasing, Lena found out that Jack, as much of a great scientist he was, he definitely didn't know how to draw and Ellie was frustrated for choosing him as her pair. 

They were surprised with how well Eliza and Lillian were doing together, but the strongest pairs were, of course, Alex with J'onn and Kara with Lena, always close to each other on the leader board but, during the tiebreaker round, Kara and Lena were victorious.

It was around eleven when the house was empty and quiet again. Jack was the last one to leave, promising Ellie that he would take her to the mall before he went back to Metropolis so he could buy her any noisy toy she liked with the sole intention of annoying Lena with it. 

They were almost finished with cleaning everything up when the doorbell rang again. Lena was walking around with a garbage bag as she picked up paper towels and beer cans that were left on the coffee table, while Kara washed and put away the dishes, that were mainly just cups, and Ellie was taking a shower to get ready for bed.

Lena looked at Kara with her eyebrows furrowed, not having a single clue of who could possibly be out there so late at night. No one had forgotten anything, at least not that Lena had noticed. Kara then pulled her glasses down so she could see through the door. Her blue eyes widened and she was frozen in place for a moment. Lena's heart raced as she asked herself why Kara had been so astonished towards whomever was outside. 

Then, Kara ran to the door, almost breaking the hinges that kept it on the wall when she opened it. Lena's heart jumped to her mouth when she saw the man on the other side, his hair was bigger as well as the beard he never really let grow before. He had a backpack on his back and a small smile on his lips.

"Hey... I guess I'm late for the party-"

"Kal!" Kara jumped on her cousin, hugging him strongly as she hid her face on his shoulder. He took a deep breath before wrapping her in a hug too, closing his eyes as he felt her touch, "I can't believe you are here."

"I should have come a long time ago. I'm sorry." He apologized, his blue eyes had as many tears as hers. She gently pulled him inside before she closed the door. His eyes met Lena's, who was standing between the bigger couch and the coffee table unsure of what to do. 

Not that she didn't like Clark, he had always been warm and welcoming towards her during all the times they met before the breakup. But they didn't really have time to create a bond, before everything went wrong Kara and him didn't actually see each other in a regular basis, they both had their separated lives in different cities. 

And, much as she tried to shove it down in her mind and chest, she felt intimidated by him. She was the one who looked him in the eye while he killed her brother with a single shot of his laser eyes, burning through his body, exploding his heart, Lena felt the hot temperature of it through her clothes even though it didn't touch her. 

After doing that, he stared at Lena coldly for a few seconds as she screamed for her brother. He did so many undoubtedly terrible things, yet, she didn't want him dead. She didn't want him murdered. 

And Clark just flew away, leaving Lena behind, tied to a chair, crying for her brother.

But she knew Kara loved him dearly. So she shove it down. 

"Lena. I've seen the news. I'm glad to see you're okay."

"Thank you. I'm glad to see you're okay too." She finally took some small steps to his direction, giving him a brief hug that he ended up making longer than what she felt comfortable with, but she hid it well.

"Can I get you anything? Let me take your backpack." Kara offered, not really waiting for a response before taking the worn out blue backpack from his back and hanging it on the rack beside the front door. 

"Maybe just some water. I won't be long, I'll actually go see my mother from here, stay with her for a couple of days." He explained while Kara guided him to the kitchen, he sat on a stool while Kara took a bottle of water from inside the fridge. Lena sat by Clark's side, enlacing her fingers together as she rested her hands over the kitchen counter. 

"Where have you been?" Kara asked, her curious eyes staring at her cousin.

"Everywhere." He smiled, "I mean, not everywhere, not yet at least."

He took a map from inside the pocket of his flannel. As he opened, he revealed many red dots in every single city he had been to. Kara's blue eyes widened while she realized how much her cousin had traveled, he probably would be finished with the whole world if he flew to each place, but he told her once that the magic was on the path between one place and the other. 

"Whoa, Kal. This is amazing." She told him, impressed, "I'm sure you had all kinds of experiences."

”I did. This world is just huge, so many places to go, so many people to know. And no place is like the other, ever." 

"Yeah, Krypton wasn't even close to being this big." Kara said after a heavy sigh, "What... What exactly made you come here? National City isn't really on the way, according to the red dots."

"No, it's not. And I flew here, after almost ten years without doing it, because I had to talk to you. I had to apologize for what I said back at the Fortress of Solitude."

"What are you talking about?"

"I know I poisoned your mind back there, projecting on you my own trauma, my own loss. I shouldn't have done that to you, specially because I knew you would do whatever it took to help me, even if that meant giving up the one thing you loved the most. And I made you think that you would most certainly lose her, even though it wasn't true." He explained, Kara's eyes glimmering with tears as she took in his words with a lump in her throat, "All those years I was able to move on from everything, but this. This feeling of being responsible for your breakup."

"You didn't make my choices for me, Kal. It was my fault."

"Would you have broken up with her if I didn't terrorize you about Lena dying because of you?" He questioned her and she bit her lips. That was actually new information to Lena. She didn't know Clark was the one who basically convinced Kara that breaking up with her was the best option. 

She looked at him, her green eyes flickering with anger even though she knew it wasn't worth it. It wasn't like him being responsible or not changed anything. 

And Lena finally felt happy besides Kara, so she just wanted to leave the past behind. 

"Does it matter? It has been years, Kal. And I'm just happy to see you. I don't blame you for anything that happened, so please, don't blame yourself." Kara begged and Clark sighed, his blue eyes staring at the counter below him. 

Lena then looked away from Clark and towards the hallway, from where she could hear her daughter's footsteps coming closer.

"Mom? Mommy?" She called them as she sleeply rubbed her tired eyes and approached the kitchen, wearing her baby blue pajamas while carrying a stuffed animal under her arm, it wasn't the one from the carnival anymore, this one was some kind of dinosaur, Ellie never stuck with only one of them for too long, she said she wanted all of her stuffed animals to feel important, "I'm ready for bed."

"Okay. But first, Ellie, I would like you to meet someone." Kara told her, holding one of Clark's shoulders, "This is your uncle, Clark."

"Superman?" She widened her eyes as she walked closer. 

"Not for a long time now, kid." He told her with a calm voice and a small smile. Ellie offered him a hand and he politely took it, squeezing it a little bit. Ellie laughed, squeezing it harder and, judging by Clark's wide eyes, he was surprised by her strength, "Wow. You're stronger than me."

"Did you hear that, mom? I'm stronger than Superman." Ellie proudly told her, and Lena gave her a smile overflowing with love as she caressed her curly hair. 

"Well, Ellie, right?" He asked and she confirmed with a nod, "You're really lucky, Ellie, to have two amazing mothers who will always take good care of you." 

"I know." She told him with a smile, "Are you going to stay here?”

"No. I'm actually going to see my own mother. I haven't seen her in years." He blinked, "And I wouldn't want to mess up with your bedtime, so I'll be on my way."

"You're leaving already?" Kara groaned and Clark slightly laughed, pulling her for a hug.

"I will stop by before I start traveling again."

"But you won't take eight years to come back, right?"

"No. I promise."

"Okay." She closed her eyes, tighening her grip around him for a few seconds before she finally let go. He said his goodbyes to Ellie and Lena, retrieved his backpack, then walked towards the balcony and took off from there. 

"He's nice." Ellie commented, her eyes still staring at the place Clark was before he flew away. 

"Yeah. He is. Now, come on, let's get you to bed now." Kara said, holding her daughter's shoulders as she guided Ellie to her bedroom, Lena following close behind. 

Ellie jumped on her bed and patiently waited for her mother to cover her with her blanket. 

"Sweet dreams, El." Lena kissed her forehead.

"I love you." Kara gave her two kisses on her warm cheeks.

"I love you too. And I love having you two at the same time." Ellie told them with blushed cheeks, "It's my favorite thing in the world."

Lena felt her heart grow three sizes bigger at the sound of that, and, judging by Kara's tender smile, she probably felt something similar. They said goodnight before leaving the bedroom, the door was left with a small gap by Ellie's request. She didn't even ask for a story, but the day had been long and she was visibly tired, so they didn't overthink that small detail much. 

"Are you okay?" Lena whispered after they were inside their bedroom, touching Kara's back. Kara turned towards her and sighed with relief. 

"I am. I'm really glad he came. I could see in his eyes that he is finally in peace, you know? I think it was the last thing I needed to feel completely happy right now."

"Then I'm glad he came too." Len gave her a genuine smile, relieved to see that Kara was feeling good with herself. 

"And what about you?" Kara's eyes were deeply into Lena's, "I've never really asked you how do you feel about Clark. After everything."

"I'll never forget, Kara. But I don't really resent him. That's not the right word, even though I don't think I even know the right word." Lena confessed, "But he's your family. And I could never hate him."

Kara then softly pulled her into a hug and Lena felt completely safe on her embrace. 

"I'm really sorry" She whispered into Lena's ear.

"Kara, I'm okay. I survived the worst time of my life. I have an amazing daughter with you, that brought us together when the time was right for both of us. And now, you're here, holding me. There's nothing to feel sorry for." 

"I'm so glad to have you again that I don't feel like ever letting go of you."

"Then don't. Just keep holding me."

"I will."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry if i made the game night part too long, i just felt like i teased it so many times that i had to make it complete and detailed (btw I'm sorry that you didn't get to play Monopoly Ellie)
> 
> and it's almost time to say goodbye.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter, Kara receives a printed note.

TWO YEARS LATER

Kara squeezed Lena's hand when she heard her heartbeat fastening its pace as the car went through the white gates of the Luthor estate. The manor was huge, as expected, yet Kara's eyes still widened as she realized the actual size of it all, not only the house but the land around it. She asked herself if Eliza's neighborhood in Midvale was even that big. 

"Whoa. Look at how big it is!" Ellie exclaimed with excitement, her hands touching the glass of the car window as she tried to get a closer look at the manor, that seemed to get bigger as they approached the front garden, covered in snow. Lillian had insisted that they spent that year's Christmas there, not only them but also Kara's entire family. And, since Lillian had been nothing but great towards them lately, why would they say no?

Kara had never been there. And she was pretty sure that Lena hasn't steeped foot in this place in a long time. 

"I thought you didn't like big houses." Lena reminded her, and Kara also remembered Ellie saying something like that, like how she liked Kara's apartment for it's smaller size compared to where she used to live with Lena in Metropolis.

"I don't. But big yards are cool." Ellie explained, and it was clear she was the only one actually excited to be there, "Can't we live in a small house in the middle of a very big yard?"

"I'll keep that in mind." Lena had a small smile on her face as she looked at their daughter through the mirror. She was the one driving, guiding the car behind them with the rest of their family. The car stopped in front of the main doors, and Lena took a deep breath before turning the engine off. 

"Are you okay?" Kara softly asked her, and Lena nodded slowly, not really reassuring Kara of anything if she was honest. Lena was visibly nervous since they left home earlier that day, and Kara was worried with the possibility that Lena's past still got to her so heavily. 

The three of them left the car, Ellie instantly having fun with the fluffy snow bellow her feet, jumping to mark her footsteps on the ground. Both her and Kara were wearing winter clothes even though they didn't have to, more for appearances sake. Ellie didn't complain though, she finally got to wear her boots that were like dinosaur legs, it even had small claws in the front, so she was actually pretty happy with the situation. 

"Should we turn on the GPS before going in?" Alex asked with a smirk on her face as she left the car that was parked right behind theirs. Lena laughed while Alex approached them, followed by Sam, Ruby and Eliza. 

"No, but stay close or you might actually get lost." Lena warned her, and Kara wasn't sure if she was joking or not. Lena was the first one to start walking towards the entrance, leading the group to the front door, that was opened by smiling Lillian before they finished climbing up the concrete stairs. 

"Grandma!" Ellie greeted her with a grin as she sprinted towards Lillian, who leaned down so she could hug her. It had been a couple of months since Lillian saw them for the last time, so Ellie clearly missed her.

"Hello, my dear." Lillian softly caressed Ellie's hair, then she looked up to the rest of her guests, "I'm really glad you all actually came." 

"Of course." Lena smiled at her mother before she was wrapped in a hug too. It took them a while to stablish that kind of intimacy, but it became natural with the time. 

With Kara, she still wasn't so close and Kara honestly didn't know if she ever would be. She probably looked at Kara and still remembered Superman, the one who killed her son, but she squeezed her arm in a caring way to greet her, accompanied by a small smile that Kara gave right back to her. With all the niceties out of the way, Lillian guided them inside the Manor after ordering the house staff to go outside and get their baggage, that wasn't really much since they would only be staying until the 26th, but they had brought a fair amount of presents. 

Kara noticed her family's discomfort at that, they were not used to have someone do things like that for them and they were planning on taking their things inside themselves later. That discomfort didn't get any better when a Butler politely took their coats from them, but none of them wanted to be rude to Lillian, so they just played along, following her through the hallway that took to the living room. 

The living room was fully decorated with Christmas ornaments and lights, what made Lena gasp by Kara's side. She remembered her first Christmas with Lena and how unfamiliar she was with the traditions and the love that the Danvers put into it, so it didn't take her much to guess that the Luthors weren't very fond of Christmas celebrations. At least until that very moment. 

"This is the biggest Christmas tree I have ever seen!" Ellie's blue eyes grew big as she got close, standing a few steps away from the huge tree that touched the ceiling. It was nicely decorated, matching the color palette that was mostly beige and brown. The pile of presents below it was impressively big, and those were just Lillian's. 

"I'm glad you liked it. I was afraid it was too much, I never really went... Tree shopping." Lillian pressed her lips, the last phrase in that sentence struggling to come out. 

"You did great, mother." Lena assured her as her eyes studied her surroundings, just like everyone else's. 

"Thank you." Lillian said, seeming genuinely happy, "So, I've arranged guest rooms for all of you. Lena, I wasn't sure of what you wanted to be done with your old bedroom so I didn't touch it, you and Kara could stay there or in another guest bedroom, you let me know what you decide."

"Wait, we're not sharing rooms?" Ruby asked wide eyed and Sam slightly poked her arm.

"No, that won't be necessary. There's plenty of space." Lillian smiled proudly, and Kara remembered Lena once mentioning that they had eleven bedrooms in that house, all of them with their private bathrooms, "Which reminds me, Ellie, I had a room decorated specially for you."

"I have my own room? Can I see it?" Ellie jumped excitedly as she asked. Kara was impressed with the gesture, since Lillian didn't even live at the Manor anymore, so they wouldn't really visit a lot, at least didn't intend to. 

"Of course. And It's just one of your many Christmas gifts. I'll take you all to where you'll be staying." Lillian nodded and started walking towards the stairs. Kara looked at Lena and had to hold a laugh, she had the very same face she always did when she though Lillian was spoiling Ellie too much. However, she didn't make any aloud complaints about it as they followed Lillian upstairs. 

They were shown to their rooms, all of their things already there when they arrived. Kara was impressed once again by how carefully made each of the guest rooms were, if it weren't for the lack of personal items inside and for the obvious pattern between one another she would think that any of them could easily be the main bedroom. After a small tour, Eliza, Lillian and Ellie went to the kitchen to start the food preparation, Alex, Sam and Ruby were exploring on their own while Lena was showing Kara around.

She held her hand as she guided her trough the hallways, making a first stop in front of double sliding doors. She opened them, revealing a library so huge that Kara asked herself if National City's public library was that big.

"This was where I met my mother and my brother the day I got home. They were both here, playing chess when we arrived." Lena told her, and Kara stared at the room, trying to picture Lena with four years old facing the new reality that was abruptly thrown at her.

"And how was it?" She asked. Lena knew in details about Kara's arrival on earth, yet Kara didn't know much about Lena's introduction to the Luthors. 

"We arrived at night, and I'm pretty sure my mother had no idea my father was going to bring me home that day. She was... unpleasantly surprised to see me. But she smiled anyway. And Lex invited me to play chess with him, completely unbothered by the circumstances that brought me here" Lena's eyes looked around as she recalled her past, "I remember to feel scared. Even though my father kept assuring me it would be alright the whole way here, it wasn't like I knew him enough to trust him at the time. They were all strangers."

"You were always brave then." Kara put her arm around Lena's shoulder, pulling her closer before kissing her forehead. 

"Not much to be honest. I also used to think this room was haunted. I don't really remember why." Kara gave her a small laugh and Lena smiled, closing the doors and proceeding to the next room. 

They actually went inside this time, and Kara studied the surroundings of what was clearly Lena's bedroom. The walls were sage green, same color as the window seat, that had multiple pillows over it, as well as an unfolded blanket. The bed was in the middle, its grey sheets looked like had been recently changed, and the desk on the corner had many electronic parts spread haphazardly over it. The bookshelf didn't have any free space, nor did the glass display that stored trophies and medals that Lena had earned through the years. 

She went closer to the display and started to read the labels on the awards, a smile on her face that grew bigger at each label she read. 

"You're amazing." Kara gasped after she found the oldest trophy, that Lena was awarded when she was only seven. 

"Yeah. Why play like a normal child when I can create a robotic car that drives itself on a circuit." Lena rolled her eyes but she had a small smile on her lips. She opened the doors that took to the closet, that was still filled with her teenage clothes, "On my first days here I used to sleep inside the closet, bellow this shelf." Lena pointed at the lowest shelf in the wall. The space bellow it was narrow, but it was probably enough to fit a small child, "It felt safer there, I don't know why. When my mother found me here she started locking the closet doors before I went to sleep."

Kara sighed heavily. 

"And how long did it take for you to sleep well in your bed?"

"After one night I was exhausted enough to sleep anywhere." Lena shrugged, then walked towards the window seat, a small smile growing on her face as she pointed to something outside, towards the window. Kara leaned closer to take a better look at it. A tree house, "My father gave it to me as a welcome gift. It was also the source of my first broken bone."

"What happened?"

"I was in there... Drawing, I think, and then it started to rain all of a sudden. I tried to leave as quick as I could but I slipped and fell over my arm." Lena giggled as she remembered and Kara giggled too, not thrilled over Lena getting hurt in any way but glad to see she wasn't as tense about being home as she had been a few hours ago.

The next room they visited was the workshop. Kara noticed Lena's heartbeat peaking as she opened the door, the inside wasn't what Kara would call messy, but it did look like someone had left unfinished work there, with a few parts over the table along with some tools. That space looked out of context inside the Victorian styled house, with the amount of monitors and displays, the strongboxes that probably kept their projects safe. Even though they were children, it looked like science was never really just a hobby for the Luthor siblings. 

"Here is where I spent most of my time with Lex." Lena explained, standing still in front of the open doors with no intention of going inside, "Even when he wasn't home I would stay here, trying to build something to impress him when he returned."

"And he was never impressed, was he?"

"Of course not." Lena's smile was bittersweet. She then closed the door, walking towards the end of the hallway and opening the last door on the left. There wasn't much inside this room except from a few books and a piano on the center, black with golden details on the sides. Kara couldn't believe they had an entire room in the house for a single piano, but then she remembered Lena mentioned the fortune that piano was worth once, so maybe it made sense. 

"In the beginning I hated it here." Lena started, "I was a natural with science and robotics, piano on the other hand took some time to grow on me."

"You didn't like it?"

"It was too frustrating. I guess I wasn't used to not learn things fast. But, eventually, I learned and started to come play even when I wasn't being tutored."

"Are you finally going to give me the honor of hearing you play?" Kara asked her, pleading blue eyes that she knew Lena would never say no to. Lena sighed, but didn't look really bothered as she walked towards the piano, sitting on the bench in front of it. Kara went closer, attentively staring at Lena, waiting for her to start. Her fingers ran through some keys before she paused for a few seconds, eyes closed as she looked in her head for a song to play. 

"I'm going to try something... I'm sorry if it doesn't work." Lena told her, sparkling Kara's curiosity. 

She then started carefully playing the notes, the sweet and familiar melody filling the empty room. Kara couldn't take her eyes off Lena, that looked ethereal as she played the piano so graciously and confidently. And Kara's eyes widened when she felt the familiarity of the sound, that made her heart skip a beat. It was a song from Krypton. A song that Kara used to hum all the time around the house while she did her shores or took a shower, without ever actually realizing it. She didn't remember the lyrics, it got lost among many other things about her home planet she had forgotten, but the rhythm never left her mind. 

It looked like Lena not only still remembered it but also memorized. 

And Kara once again knew she was in love. It wasn't the first time that she was struck by the absolute certainty of her love for Lena, she was reminded of it all the time, specially during those moments where Lena didn't need to say the words "I love you" to make Kara feel completely and undeniably loved by her too. 

The song finally slowed its pace and after the last note was played, Lena opened her eyes and it took three seconds of them staring at each other before Kara couldn't bear it anymore and kissed Lena strongly, feeling the sweet taste of her lips against hers. Lena ran her thumb over Kara's cheek as they kissed, slowly and lovingly. 

The spell was broken when a phone started ringing, startling both of them since they were so focused on each other they even forgot they were still in the room. Lena's eyebrows furrowed in confusion and she turned her phone towards Kara, showing the screen that displayed Alex's name on it. 

"Hello?"

"So... Can you please tell me how to get to the kitchen?"

"What? Are you serious?" Lena looked at Kara, covering her mouth so she wouldn't laugh while Kara was already doing it. 

"I think I'm... On a... living room? Not that one with the tree, a different one. I don't know. I have been to three rooms that look like a living room already. Why would you need that many?"

When Lena and Kara finally stopped laughing, they went to Alex's rescue, but of course they didn't let her live it down for the rest of the day. When the night came, they all had dinner together, sat around the enormous wooden table that, when asked by Eliza, Lillian mentioned it had been on the Luthor family for generations. They talked during the whole meal, Ellie, much to Kara and Lena's relief, was excited about her school, mentioning the amount of projects they had to do on that semester. They found out she was a practical learner, that was the main reason why her old school back in metropolis was so hard for her. Alex and Sam announced they were starting the process to adopt a child, they had been thinking about that for a while and after Alex was promoted to Director of the DEO and a Sam was back to work with Lena as her CFO, they finally felt settled enough in their lives to raise another child. Ruby's opinion on that was... Cryptic, she kept just watching as everyone cheered and hugged her mothers, but maybe the idea would grow on her with the time. 

And that subject, of course, sparkled ideas into Ellie's mind, and a sibling was all she talked about when Kara and Lena put her to sleep on that night. But, to be honest? Kara wasn't opposed to the idea at all. 

"Come on!" Ellie insisted as Lena covered her with a blanket, "You both got a sibling. Now Ruby gets a sibling. I want one too."

"El... It's complicated..."

"You always say that when you want to say no." Ellie huffed, and Lena gave her a pointed look. 

"Look, it's way past your bedtime and I know you want to be up early tomorrow to open all of those presents that are waiting for you." Kara bargained and Ellie nodded, laying her head down on the pillow, but didn't look very motivated to sleep, "Sleep well, little girl."

"Wait, I made up a joke with aunt Alex." She started, grabbing her classes from the nightstand and putting them back on, "Look, I'm Ellie", she smiled and took the glasses off, "And now I am Super Little Girl!"

Both Lena and Kara started laughing, Kara shaking her head as she imagined Alex and her daughter mocking her disguise together. 

"Go. To. Sleep." Lena told her, kissing her forehead, then her cheek, then her forehead again, making Ellie laugh. Kara would always cherish those moments, where those small things on her routine with Ellie and Lena made her feel so happy, "Goodnight, Ellie."

"Goodnight, mom. And mommy." She sighed, realizing that she couldn't really escape and would have to go to sleep against all the energy she apparently still had in her body. 

"Love you." Kara said before closing the door behind her. Lena tangled her fingers on Kara's hands as they walked together towards the room where they would be staying, Lena said she would just feel more comfortable sleeping somewhere other than her old bedroom, that didn't really hold that many good memories. When she opened the door, Kara put her eyebrows together when she caught the rate of Lena's heartbeat skyrocketing out of nowhere. 

"Lena? Are you okay?" She asked her, worried blue eyes looking down at Lena, who walked to her suitcase on the floor and opened the front pocket, taking off from it a red envelope.

"I... Today was special, you know. You always shared with me everything about your childhood, at least as much as you could. I remember the first time we went to Eliza's place in Midvale and every inch of that house reminded you of a story to tell. I wanted to do the same today. Let you in my past too." Lena started, her fidgeting her finger as she held the envelo I know it's against tradition... But I wanted to give you something."

"An early Christmas gift?" Kara's eyes sparkled with joy and curiosity just like a small child, making Lena slightly laugh at that, her eyes staring at Kara lovingly as she walked closer to her. 

"Not quite. But kind of." Lena offered Kara the envelope, her heart beating even faster as Kara opened it up, taking the soft piece of paper inside it. 

It was a printed note with four words on it:

"Will you marry me?"

"You believing in printed notes it's kind of an inside joke now." Lena said as she got down on one knee, opening the little velvet box to reveal the white gold ring inside. Kara pressed her lips, trying to hold the tears even though she could already feel them going down her face, "Kara, for a long time in my life I didn't believe in love. I used to see it more as a powerful word than an actual feeling. And I guess this was just one of many things you changed my mind about when you got into my life. You changed my mind about animated movies, that can actually carry deeper meaning than many movies out there. You changed my mind about hamburgers, that are worth the calories if you consider the taste. You changed my mind about carnivals, and board games, and Christmas, and Valentines Day, making everything that I once thought was useless, matter. But, most importantly, you changed my mind about love. You made me believe it. You made me feel it. And I never felt something as strong as the love I feel for you. So... Will you marry me?"

Kara just looked at her for a moment, speechless before kneeling down in front of Lena too, who laughed with tears prickling on her green eyes. Kara gave Lena a teary smile as she nodded, not able to say a word but, if she could, it would be a thousand times yes. She couldn't think of anyone else she would rather spent her life with than with Lena. 

They both had tears falling down their cheeks as Lena put the ring on Kara's finger, pulling her closer to kiss her right after. 

On the next morning, they were woken up by a very excited Ellie, jumping on their bed while yelling "Merry Christmas! Wake up!", eager to go downstairs and open her presents. Lena grumbled, trying to hide her face on Kara's chest, but Ellie was surprisingly insistent, specially for someone who was up that early in the morning. She was only satisfied when Kara got up from the bed, Regardless of Lena's protests. 

"I'll be waiting downstairs, but come, quick!" She jumped her way out of the room and Lena sighed, her green eyes still closed as she did so. She was tired, it wasn't like her and Kara had too much time to sleep at night anyways, they went straight to bed after Lena proposed, but not to sleep. 

"Good morning, fiancé." Kara smiled as she leaned down to kiss Lena, who smiled too. 

"Yeah, suddenly it's a good morning." Lena finally opened her eyes, holding Kara's face between her hands and stealing one more kiss from her, "Merry Christmas, fiancé"

"Merry Christmas."

"We need to go, before Ellie comes back for us."

"Right." Lena mumbled, getting up from the bed too, stretching her arms before she actually followed Kara to the door. She stopped midway there, something inside her bag on the floor catching the attention of her eyes. 

"What's wrong?" Kara asked her, trying to follow Lena's gaze and finding a white box falling off the bag, partially covered up by Lena's pants and sweater that she took off last night. Kara's eyes widened, because if that box was still inside the bag and it hadn't been opened... It could only mean one thing. 

"I forgot the red sun lamp."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started writing this one night after watching The Game Plan for probably the 10th time (and I don't know about you guys but I'm able to place Supercorp in almost every movie I watch) and suddenly I had a 6k of words first chapter of something that I thought maybe was worth sharing here, and I really didn't expect people to read and comment and I felt really motivated to move on. It's really magical for a writer when there's someone out there, even if it is one person, that appreciates the work we put on our stories and that shares the same love for the world we created on our minds. 
> 
> Special thanks to Barbara, who read every chapter beforehand, helped me fix all the erros, gave her opinion on the narrative and was there to support me during all the times I thought about just deleting the story and pretending that it never happened. Thanks to my girlfriend who listened to the whole plot of this thing and gave me an outside view of everything that was going on even though she doesn't even read fanfics and it's still watching season 4 of Supergirl. And, of course, thanks to all of you, to the ones who were here since the beginning, to the ones who are here now and to the ones that maybe will be here on the future. 
> 
> See you in the next one. Hopefully.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!


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